PB- hun, just for the record, i was one of those people who PM'ed you with support. It wasn't because I was afraid of retribution. It was because I wanted to give you the support I could see you needed, but I didn't want to publicly contribute to a thread that was effectively slandering someone who was not online to defend themselves, and probably not even aware such a discussion was taking place. Now pb I know that was not your intention. When I read you OP, i was not aware that it was a specific comment that upset you, it was someone else's post that alerted me to that. But that seems to be what this thread turned into.

I understand what was said was hurtful- like I said in my PM, that would have devastated me. But this would also devastate me- if I made a thoughtless comment, after a long and stressful day, (who can say they haven't done that?) that was interpreted the wrong way by a lot of people; then there is a public thread about how insensitve I've been, without me having a chance to explain myself. That would be quite hurtful as well.

Just my two cents. i think it's important to take everything everyone says online- no matter who they are- with a pebble-sized grain of salt. I hope you can find some peace with this pb- it almost seems like the person who is being hardest on you about ff is yourself. You did the right thing for you and your baby, deep down you know that- take it, own it, be proud of the mummy you are