Morning All. Sorry kittykat for the probs you are having right now. The best thing for your dd is to keep her with you. This is a tough few years and if you give up on her now she will remember it when she is older. However she will remember who was there for her when she is older as well. She will eventually understand that she has a loving mother and that nobody can ever replace her. You will be so glad that you did not give in to her, when you see that everything that you have been teaching her comes out thru her. When that day comes I will be so happy for you. It is so hard to raise teenagers and have a son still going thru it at almost 16yrs and another son 12 well on is way. If your ex is letting her get away with everything, you can be safe to say that that is why she wants to go be with him. Kids don't like rules and want to do whatever they want, but the only prob is someone has too be the responsible parent otherwise where could our kids end up.... Too scarey to comprehend. She will be so grateful that you took the time to protect and guide her thru the most diificult time of her development, and that you had rules in place for that reason. One thing tho that you cannot forget, and that is your dd really does love you and she really does know that you love her. They just like to make us feel bad at times, especially if we don't let them get away with everything.

Do not doubt that you are a great mother because you really are. You have got all your children with you and have given them a caring home with your dh.

Take care