i agree hun - don't obvioulsly omit your children - they are a part of your life - just tell her from the outset that if things are getting uncomfy with something you say, then she needs to tell you. you'll have things about your life that you can't help but speak of - like the convo we had earlier where you're still wearning mat clothes ( ) - if you happen to say "i wish i could find every day pants as comfy as my mat pants" then it's no biggie - but don't then have a full on conversation about the hell of finding the best pants etc.

try to remember what it was that made you and her friends in the first place - what did you have in common? if either of you have something big coming up, discuss it - but if it revolves are kid things, minimise the kidlet aspect, and talk about how it impacts YOU! you're thinking of moving - that's about you and your DH and the opportunities for the two of you - the kidlets just go with you - so talk about that kind of thing kwim?

it's never possible to not discuss your children at all - if you did, you'd be a pretty cruddy mum - what you have to do is read her responses to the conversation, and if she doesn't engage you, change the topic. so, i guess what i'm saying is if you mention the kids and you get yes no, uh huh responses, she's not comfy - if you get "wow, that's fantastic, how is Mehkelti coping with day care" then you can see she wants to encourage that convo....

If she decides to talk about the fertility stuff, you do have a vague idea of what it's about - you don't have to know the facts and figures, but you can empathise (and you do it pretty well) - and if she chooses to divulge her reasons for not pursuing any treatment, that's up to her. if she mentions trying things, i'm pretty sure you have a reasonable understanding of things like PCOS, endo, IUI, IVF so will at least get what she's saying...

Enjoy your time out with your friend - and just see how it goes - if you don't have that same degree of comfort with her that you had before, itmight truly be that you're in different places in your life - it's damn hard to admit it, but sometimes it's just not possible to maintain friendships when your lives are so very different - esp when one has what another can never have kwim?

hugs babe

BG