Miscarriage/Loss General Discussion #1

**Saffy** · October 28th, 2011, 03:20 PM

Hi girls, hope everyone is going ok.

tellytubby- gosh thats hard to be babysitting while she goes to OBs appts- I would be too embarrassed to ask if I was her- you are kind to do that xx

pakrakmg- I have been dreading christmas this year, I can't bear the thought of not being pregnant either. That is really a hard one that xmas day is your EDD, big hugs to you. I hope you get lucky before then.

hi everyone else

I had some blood tests recently which may have shed some light on my miscarriages- my FS rang yesterday to tell me I tested positive to anticardiolipin antibodies, so I need to take clexane, aspirin and high dose folate next cycle. I really hope this is going to be the answer to my prayers, but feel a bit sad that I lost all my babies because of something in my body. I asked my old Fs earlier this year to test me but he wouldn't- it might have made the difference to save my last bubba. I guess we will never know and I have to look to the future. I still have a high risk of m/c due to being nearly 40 -it makes me feel a bit panicky at times, I still can't imagine being hugely pregnant- will it ever happen??

**Diamond Girl** · October 28th, 2011, 03:33 PM

Saffy, just wanted to let you know that I tested positive for anticardiolipin antibodies about four months ago. I was put on daily clexane injections and asprin at the start of this pg. After three m/cs in a row I finally have what looks like a healthy bean growing. I just wanted to tell you this because I had no hope that I would ever carry another baby again, but this treatment seems to be working. I hope and pray you have the same results.

I regret too that I didnt push testing more after my second m/c and it still upsets me that my body failed my little ones too.

**Freya** · October 28th, 2011, 03:51 PM

Saffy, Ive been where you are as well after testing being done! When I finally had a world renown miscarriage specialist tell me why Ive had 5 miscarriages and that Im lucky to even have had 3 successful pregnancies I felt like such a failure. Its easier to think it was out of your hands than the fact it was your own body sabotaging your efforts. Doomed before they even started.

I will be on a clexane and asprin regime when we get pregnant again (but I have antiphospholipid syndrome) and I am trying to be confident that it will be the right fix for a term, healthy pregnancy! Its hard to stay positive though (although DG I am so happy to hear your doing well!!!! Gives me alot of hope!)

**Freya** · October 28th, 2011, 04:04 PM

I want updates from everyone! How are we all going?

How are our babies-in-waiting going?
How are our TTCers feeling?

Is anyone else playing the waiting-to-ttc game with me? Was it you Pak?

As for me, well I had a panic moment a few weeks back and actually told DH I didnt want anymore children. Im just so tired, physically and mentally these days (although I guess our situation influences that) and I just didnt feel I had anymore fight in me to ride the pregnancy merry-go-round again. I see newborn babies and my heart melts and breaks at the same time. He was really upset because I worked so hard convincing him to be cool with another baby (and he keeps mentioning "well and maybe one more" after that!) and then I go and yank it out from under him. But I worked through it, with the help of a couple of friends new babies, Im clucky but scared, which I suppose is normal. We'll definately go one more but if we have another miscarriage I am done. So Dh is home very soon and should be in time for the start of my cycle sooooooo we'll be TTC a little European souvenier

**Miss.September** · October 28th, 2011, 04:22 PM

We're TTC I thought last month may have been a success, even though I knew it wasn't possible, I allowed myself to hope and get excited only for AF to turn up and shake her fist at me.

I'm feeling excited and anxious. More anxious, me thinks. In a blink of an eye it can all be over. All the hope and dreams. And yet it can go so right too. I'm being positive. I'm going for a walk, eating well and the moment that bit of self pity and sadness creeps in, I find something to do. So I have very clean walls, a nicely pruned front garden and clean light fittings in my kitchen

Telly - How are you going beautiful?

DG - I'm so happy for you. Loved reading your other thread, you must be so relieved.

Saffy - Got my fingers crossed for you that now you have some answers, you'll have a bubba soon!

Freya - Not long to go now! I think things get harder the closer it gets. DH must be excited too! Hope you get your BFP during your travels!

Maruschke - How are you going hun?

Hi to anyone that I've missed. Hope you're all okay

**Freya** · October 28th, 2011, 04:57 PM

DH is beyond excited. Its all he talks about, which is actually really annoying because for me; yeah I am excited and I get butterflies when I think about picking him up at the airport but Im also so nervous because 8mths is a long time to be alone, raising the kids and running the life that suits us. Im also in a bit of a holding pattern, I know its coming and its not far away but it just doesnt seem 'real' if that makes sense? We've got tons happening between now and then; halloween parties and birthdays and to start getting the christmas stuff organised, packing for Europe. Hopefully it makes time fly but right now its draaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagging on.