Miscarriage/Loss General Discussion #1

[tellytubby]

Ahh forshelby... I know how you feel. That is such a beautiful message, gave me the most wonderful warm fuzzy's. I really appreciate your friendship, and am so glad that we have reconnected and share a special connection, even in such horrible circumstances.. thank you x

Freya, ahh I hate unwanted, snoopy family. I hope you have once again found a safe place in bb. I don't know what I'd do without this community.
Hi diamond how are you going? I've thought about you a bit lately, hoping you're staying strong. I'm so sorry your friendship isn't as it used to be, just as you need a shoulder to cry on too . August is so close too .. so tell me, will you be trying again? I'm sure there will be a sticky babe waiting for you gorgeous, I pray your next pregnancy will be the one x

Pak, hope your planning is going well,and the special days are marked on the calendar remember the pattern. Angel baby, healthy baby, angel baby, HEALTHY baby.

Afm, I started painting again. I stopped painting midway through uni. But these past few weeks I've been wanting to express myself through art once again. I did a basic painting the other day as my brushes weren't the best. But have since bought some good ones, so am hoping to get the creative juices flowing this week. I am focusing on the theme "spring". Inspired by the John butler trio song, spring. Ladies, please. If you haven't already please YouTube this song. It is just beautiful. I know you will all love it, google the lyrics too

Love to all x

[Miss.September]

Thanks Tellytubby - I keep telling myself that this one is going to work. Everything is going to be fine. Hope you're finding painting cathartic.

Diamond Girl - I'm sorry for you loss. It's really difficult when you see someone who is at the stage you were supposed to be. I worked at a children's bookstore before DD, and after my first m/c, I went to work three days later. It was horrible. All these beautiful bellies seemed to come into the shop, one after the other. I hope things work out for your friendship

[Diamond Girl]

Pac - Thanks for your kind words. Goodluck on your TTC journey. I hope it goes quickly for you and that it results in a gorgeous baby at the end. Im glad you are thinking positively, because you are right - this one is going to stick.

Tellytubby - Thanks. We will TTC again when the time is right. I want to TTC straight away but I have to wait for test results first . I think its great you've gotten back to art. Ive found my solace in gardening and decorating my home and its really helped me to focus my energy on something else other than this.

Hi everyone else

[LuluHB]

Hi ladies. I thought I might join you if that's ok.

I've just had my fourth miscarriage from five cycles trying to conceive #3. My DH is overseas working at the moment so I'm here alone feeling so miserable. I've now had 7 losses at various stages and for various reasons, and I'm just so weary of the whole process. I have two beautiful daughters and I am so grateful for them, and I know I am a lot luckier than so many lovely ladies, but I am so desperate for another baby. I feel as if someone is playing a cruel trick on me - "yep, you can get pregnant at the drop of a hat but it won't stick". We are supposed to be starting with a fertility specialist when my DH gets home but I just don't know I have the strength to keep trying.

I come in and read this thread and it just makes me so sad. So many women with broken hearts. It all just seems so very unfair.

[tellytubby]

Diamond, you were getting your bubby tested to see what went wrong, right? Just trying to get my memory sorted. Let us know how the tests results go, k? So glad to hear you will be trying again, I honestly believe your time will gone, you've got two healthy children now, so we know your body can do it. . Just a matter of when. I like to think of it like, our body's will only accept the very best, absolutely perfect sperm and egg combination, when that will happen - who knows, but it WILL happen. Hang in there... I wish our friendship hadn't begun over such sad circumstances, but at the same time I'm glad we have "met", itms. We can support eachother on this road x ( ps I've been gardening alot lately too)

Hi lulu . I recognize your user name! I always seem to notice it floating around . I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time getting a sticky babe, it really does suck. Glad you've decided to join in, having someone to talk to, I've found, really helps. have you been waiting a cycle between attempts? My ob told me it's best to wait a cycle, otherwise the chances of another miscarriage rise. Sorry to hear your hubby is overseas, you must be feeling so lonely . Do you have any family nearby to rely on?

Pac how have you been going gorgeous?

Freya? Are you still reading? Hope you're feeling okay x

Afm, not much to report on. It has now been 4 weeks since my d&c, still no af. How long did every ones cycle take to return? Or how long until the first period? Having this miscarriage has made me realize how much I want this. I really want to complete our family. I'm so excited... Yet so incredibly nervous. I'm sure you all know the feeling. Love to all x

[tellytubby]

Damn auto correct. Diamond that was suppose to read " your time will come" x

[Diamond Girl]

Telly - I am just waiting to see my OB and then I'll get the results. Thanks for your support and of course your friendship, it has meant so much to me during this difficult time. My AF has not returned yet either and my cycles are usually 25 days. Im pretty sure I O'd last week though. With my previous D&C I had AF after just 24 days. Im glad you are excited about completing your family and I def know the feeling. Im sure it will be smooth sailing once you get your BFP.

Hi Lulu - Im sorry to hear about your losses. I too am weary from this. Its been 13 months since we started TTC and 3 losses, I cant imagine another. I hope you are ok and I'll be here if you need to talk

[Miss.September]

Lulu - I wish I had words to say something that would take it all away. I'm so sorry for your losses. I feel the same, I can conceive easily, but feel like its a battle to hang on, even though I haven't had many m/c. I hope you can have a sticky baby hun

Tellytubby - After my D&C, AF returned like a normal cycle, but it was once I finished bleeding from the D&C. So 28 days after it all ended, AF arrived, ITMS. We waited for a full cycle before we tried again. I had the D&C at the beginning of April, and we got a BFP in July. I hope it happens quickly for you

Diamond Girl - I hope the test results give you something conclusive so you've got something to work with. I think for me, if I was to have testing done and it was inconclusive, well it'd drive me crazy. Hope everything goes well

Nothing much from me. I feel like my body has returned to normal now. I guess when it happens though, I won't feel pg until I get to 12 weeks. It's too hard. And on top of that, we have a few of our loved ones TTC, but all having difficulties and I feel a bit messed up that we can conceive easily and I feel like that very few will be genuinely happy for us, given that so few know about this recent m/c. But I don't want to announce it like some kind of trophy, "Hey we're having a baby, after we lost one". It's wrong. I know I'm thinking too far ahead, not even pg! But I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place in regards to that. I hope I haven't offended anyone saying that, it's something that's been playing on both DH and my minds lately. Because I know when we get to 12 weeks (and we WILL ), we're going to want to scream it from the rooftops.

[Diamond Girl]

Pac - Im glad your body has returned to normal, because now you can put your energy into TTC when you are ready. When you make it to 12 weeks you should scream it from the rooftops. If I ever get that far again I sure will be

AFM - I found yesterday hard for some reason, and was really depressed. Sometimes I really feel the weight of it all and its difficult to cope, but then Im totally fine the next day. I guess its all part of the process. Today is a better day so far.

[LuluHB]

Thanks for the lovely welcome ladies.

Tellytubby - I have only needed two D&Cs but both times I was like Pac - bleeding from the procedure which lasted for about 10 days or so from memory, and then a month later AF. I hope you're back to normal soon so you can get back on your journey, as scary as that journey is!

Pac - I agree with DG - you are entitled to sing it from the roof tops when you get to 12 weeks. I understand your reservations though - one of my dearest friends had been trying for years to fall pregnant when I had to tell her that I was pregnant again with a 3 month old. Try and remember that you are entitled to your happiness, even while others have grief. I've learned that we usually don't know just what road each of us has travelled to get to motherhood, and I would hate to think any woman doesn't feel the joy and support from loved ones when pregnant, no matter how many bumps I've had on my own road.

DiamondGirl - I hope your day is continuing to improve, and that you get test results soon that give you some answers.

I'm feeling a little more together today. It is certainly harder to deal with all this on my own. I really wish my DH were here and think it was almost as painful as the miscarriage seeing him on skype so upset and helpless so far away. I guess it also reminded me of just how much I want another little piece of my lovely husband, so once he gets home we'll be trying again.

[Miss.September]

Diamond Girl - Hope your day has been a good one. I know what you mean when you say that the weight of it is there. It just sits on your shoulders every now and again. Hope your next few days are good ones too.

LuluHB - Thanks hun. I hope your DH comes home soon.

My mum got home from a trip to Vietnam and Cambodia today, and she said they went somewhere and they were blessed in an un-religious way. She said she felt at peace and just sat down and said a few quick quiet wishes for both me and my SIL, for us to both have happy and healthy pregnancies. Nawww.

[Miss.September]

Just popping in to see how you're all going and to send out a

[dantri]

Oh I didn't realize this thread existed. I feel as though I don't belong anywhere at the moment. I'm almost ready to start looking forward from my missed mc last week but can't TTC yet until my first cycle and of course its too painful to be in my belly buddies group. I told my friend about the pregnancy and miscarriage yesterday. She was the first person outside of my immediate family. She was really good expect is a few years younger, not in a relationship and nowhere near ready to have kids so ah just doesn't get it. Not her fault but it was frustrating you know. She kept saying, you'll get pregnant again, it will happen. And I know that but it hurts so much that i was pregnant and now I'm not and my longing to be pregnant again hurts physically. I have a knot in my stomach that won't go away yet I feel empty.

I was going to see another friend, while not as close, is very open and has had a miscarriage.l herself. She also has 3 kids.

I woke up this morning though feeling like crap. I feel that overwhelming sense of despair again. So glad DH hasn't gone back to work yet.

Sorry to be doom and gloom. It's just so hard talking to people irl about this that are as supportive and understanding as you guys.


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[LuluHB]

SOrry you're having a bad day today Dantri. Its all just crap isn't it - just when you think you're starting to get on top of it something else happens and you feel like you're back to where you started. If its any consolation, it does get easier with time.

I've just found out my SIL is pregnant so feeling pretty sorry for myself too. We would have been due about the same time so its especially hard. Have an IL family function on Sunday and just don't know that I can face it, especially without DH.

[Diamond Girl]

Dantri, I still have more bad days than good, but I know the good days will outnumber the bad someday. Hopefully it will happen sooner rather than later for you.

Pac - Hugs to you too

Lulu - I hope you are able to get through Sunday ok. Hugs.

Telly - I hope you are doing ok.

AFM - Still waiting for AF to arrive.

[toomanyshoes]

Hope it's ok if I pop in here.

Have just found out we can't TTC for at least the next 6 months and I just don't feel I "fit" anywhere else at the moment.

I have so much trouble keeping up with these on going threads, I seem to fall off the bandwagon because I feel silly complaining about my situation when others have gone through so much worse but I will try to keep up.

I'm really not coping with all the pregnancy announcements and belly photos on facebook at the moment.

We're getting close to clocking over to our 5th year of TTC #3, I'm starting to kick myself for not pushing harder to find out why my m/c's happened and didn't bother with follow up appointments.

I'm also certain that within the next few months we can expect a pregnancy announcement from my SIL (the one I can't stand). Really don't know how I'll cope with that.

Dantri - I hope you're feeling better soon

lulu - Anyway you can get out of Sunday? If not, hope it goes as smoothly as possible.

Diamond Girl - hope AF is here soon.

[tellytubby]

Hi beautiful ladies

Sorry I hadn't posted for a while, didn't get a notification until the latest post.

PAC, that is so beautiful that you were "blessed". What a humbling feeling, knowing that message is in the universe, you will go on to have a healthy pregnancy! I love that.

Dantri ( hope I got the name right I'm on my phone). Welcome to the group I'm so sorry for your loss x

Lulu, I know how hard it is hearing those pregnancy announcements.. Dies your sil know that you were also expecting? X

Too many shoes - sorry to read it is taking so long to get a beautiful sticky babe. Do you know any reasons why at all? Did you have any troubles with your eldest two? When you read your sil's announcement, try to keep your chin up.. Your a gorgeous woman x

Diamond, sorry to hear you're still having more bad days than good hope time heals your heart. x

Afm- first period since my d&c. Looking forward to successfully creating a beautiful, healthy, sticky bubba. Can not believe we will be a family if five next year. Optimism. It will happen! And will for each if you also! X

[tellytubby]

Too many shoes... Are you the member with high thyroid levels?? I had a similar experience. Please fill me in on your experience? I had a high level too, miscarried. Am planning on seeing my gp to ask about them before ttc again. My level was just slightly high, 3.4 if I remember correctly..