Oh gosh, you definately need some hugs!
I can't believe that your Mum thought that your personal trauma was suitable "news" for her generic xmas newsletter... I am really gobsmacked... what did she say, 'Well, I've made the xmas pudding and my daughter has miscarried..." it's horrible, and then to say it was your fault for not telling her not to.... what?!
I am afraid I don't have any suitable advice but I totally feel for you & would be just as upset if I were in your situation, just wanted you to know that there would be alot of people that agree that this was totally unacceptable behaviour on her part & even if she hadn't realised (how this is possible I don't know) she should have atleast apologised once she knew how upset you were... *more hugs*
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