when ryan was born after a c/s his father was with him in special care till i could get there and over the next day he seemed to settle whenever his dad stroked him, then they transferred him to nicu 2hrs away and i couldnt get there till the ambulance came for me in the morning (what a nightmare ride less than two days after a c/s!) but at least i was with him but i found that although he would react to me stroking him he definitely seemed calmer when dad did it. so i just concentrated on getting him milk, got to know the machine very well! now ryan is 11mths old and he loves me i know but he is a real daddy's boy and thats ok as i can go to work and know that his dad is there for him and i dont have to worry.