Rouge not at all over the place hun - all makes sense and is spot on how we want this household to run, we just are at a loss at times as to what we are doing!! Today has been awesome, I have stayed calm all day, DD has been great and I have really been praising the good behaviour which I have been forgetting to do as well because I have been so focused on the negative.

I have also used the choices for them today and it's worked really well, so I think I have just forgotten some of these things over the last few weeks (DH was away for 4 weeks, been back for 3 but things still haven't been in a great routine since).

Anyway thanks again all - I really appreciate the advice and will definitely be continuing on. I agree about the manners thing Rouge, that is one thing we are on top of constantly.