Wow, thanks so much to everyone for the great advice.. Decision is not quite made yet but your information has brought a lot of information I had not thought of beforehand.

Looks like DH and I will have to sit down tonight and discuss this seriously as he is the best man as well which will only make it more difficult. Luckily, my MIL and SFIL will both be at the wedding and may be able to support me a little as hubby won't be able to but the reception is not in a hotel, it's at a surf club and that only makes things more difficult as I won't have a room to go back to but was going to have a chat to the surf club and see if they can be of any help at all.

Thanks so much for your feedback and keep it coming if anyone has any other suggestions or thoughts. I'll obviously need to sit down with my friend (bride) as I am not sure she is understanding the full implications of what me being a bridesmaid and a new mum at the same time and all your replies will help us make a decision...

Thanks for all the warm welcome and congratulations, it's so hard when you can't tell anyone!!!! and believe me if you knew me, you knew how hard this really is for me

Moose