Hi Becky, welcome to BellyBelly!

Firstly you need to ask yourself a few questions. Did you find your first birth to be a positive experience? If not is there anything you would want to change? There are many different sources that could help you if you do want to have a vaginal birth. Kelly has some amazing resources that she can recommend including multimedia and books, and sites, experts you name it to help you achieve the birth you want. As much as it is helpful to hear other peoples experiences regarding their c/s vs. their vaginal births realistically their own reasons for doing so in most cases are going to different from yours. So I'm not going to talk about my beliefs or my reasons for the births I chose (I had one emerg c/s & one vaginal birth after C/S) because I don't want to sway you in your decision but help by offering you the information you might need to reach a decision that is right for you. There are plenty of ways to help prevent tearing in birth. If you are after more information about tearing and how to prevent it there are plenty of resources. An active birth, and the position you give birth can also help prevent tearing, pushing when you are ready rather than purple pushing (which is pushing without the pushing urge) also prevents tearing. There are lots of things you can research. But ultimately you need to make the decision as to which is more preferable to you.

I would really want to know more as to why your Dr thinks you should have a c/s as IMO a risk of tearing isn't really a big enough risk to warrant major surgery. Having said that if C/S is something you want regardless it can be a positive experience. Yes there are risks involved and it is wise to research them, but at the end of the day if you absorbed all the information you can (or want to) and find that for you in your situation a C/S sounds like the birth experience you want to have then there are ways to help ensure that you get the most positive C/S birth you can. Brooke (B456) had an awesome C/S experience. She is definitely someone to talk to if you do wish to have a C/S. Recovery time/pain for c/s is going to differ from person to person. And it also depends on the Dr you have and the form of suturing they use.

So let us know what you want and what information you are after and I'll be happy to help.

Goodluck!

*hugs*
Cailin