The first time it happened, I was 22. DP was 30. We'd only been together for about 7 months but stupidly used no protection. Due to an accident when he was little and TTC for years with his ex to no avail meant he was infertile. Wrong! Bigtime. He freaked out. Threatened to leave me, threatened to disappear so I couldn't seek child support... told me to terminate, the works. I was devastated, of course. In the end, he was just acting out of fear. After he came to a decision to support me and the pg, I suffered a mc. It was sad and ironic.

The next pg was planned, and DS was born 10 months ago.

Most recently, I experienced a chemical pregnancy. Again unplanned. This time I was taking my birth control religiously.... but a tummy bug rendered it useless, it seems as when AF was late I got suspicious and tested. DP was surprised, but by no means freaking out. I suppose because we already have one child it wasn't a huge crisis, even though the timing would have sucked financially.

I think what I'm getting at here is that the same person can react differently to two very similar situations. I hope her DF is just speaking out of fear and shock. If not, she is going to need your support. Best of luck to her.