Maggie, Milly - good to see you both feel good enough to get on to BB. Well done. Enjoy the moment. Even if I don't always remember to ask how you are, I do think of you.

AFM - well, I have decided to have the cerclage and go in Thurs 25th March. It was a really tough decision to make, as you all know from my tortured posts, but I am really comfortable with the decision I have made. It doesn't mean I am not just a wee bit anxious about the risks involved, but if things don't go to plan, I am am reasonably confident that I won't tie myself up in knots with self recriminations and guilt. I might for a little while, but not long term. I just really feel it is the right decision for me. Filled out the hospital admissions forms and spoke to the ob today.

It's odd though, despite feeling really comfortable with the decision, today I am feeling really sad and lonely.... I suppose just feeling a wee bit sorry for myself. I am teary and flat and just want to shut myself away from the world. Probably precipttated by some different feelings in my lower abdoment this morning which turned out to be wind but had me on the verge of calling the doctor after only the first different feeling. The feelings were distinctly different from the feelings Ihave had associated with pre term labour, but still enough to put me on edge and burst that lttle bubble of invincibility I somehow manage to build. Oh well its to be expected, just have to get through it.

If I ever didn't know it before, I do today, I am an emotional eater. I just feel like getting all the naughties I can and just eating them. Pure decadence and indulgence. I haven't though