thread: To find out or not find out ????

  1. #37
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    In my own private paradise

    This is EXACTLY the same as us... Though we've already decided we're finding out, when I tell people at work we are, they're always saying 'Why find out?! It'll just spoil everything and you won't be too "into it" on the day!' We're happy to find out, for sure, but I would be fine with the fact that if bub was too stubborn or shy and we had to wait, I'd be ok with it too.

    In the end, it's yours (and DHs) choice and yours only and whatever you say goes
    i can't believe people think you won't be as "into it" on the day your baby arrives!! what the hell do they think you're there for - just to see if it's pink or blue?? we're going to become parents to our princess later this month and THAT is why i'm giving birth. for me, it's going to be so much easier knowing that SHE is coming. we already refer to her by name, daddy talks to her every night and we've bonded with her so much. my family know, and even my bro's kids refer to her by name - they have, for so long, been the only grandkids on my side of their family so it's good for them to know that their daddy will have his first bio niece and that they have to share my parents with a new little girl.

    so yes, we found out - i'd guessed at first scan based on dates and things (assisted conception so i know when i ovulated and whn we conceived and the science behind swimmer survival) - DH had kinda wanted a boy (he's the only Mr B left in his line) and it has been great for him to bond with his princess and not have to go through gender disappointment when she arrives...

  2. #38
    Registered User

    Jun 2005

    Firstly congrats on your pregnancy....

    I am the most impatient person there is so part of me wanted to find out what I was having but DH wanted the surprise so we waited and wow what a surprise it was just waiting for the middy or OB to say "it's a ?????" is so exciting...sure you can find out so oy know what colour to buy but it is just so easy to buy neatrul coloured bonds suits which is what my kids lived in for the first few months anyway and then add colour after you find out so much more fun buying stuff with a little person in mind who is sleeping quitly in the pram along side yo at the shops....

    With my 2nd samething my impatients tried to sway me but i stayed strong and again the biggest surprise on the day when you find out what you have been feeling you kick for the past 9 months....

  3. #39
    Registered User

    Feb 2009

    I found out with the first 2 - didn't with the second two, and then did with the last two.

    Having gone both sides of the fence - knowing what I know now and feeling how I do now, if you dont mind buying a couple of white bonds baby suits, putting the rest of the money away until baby is born and just getting neutral big things... then I'd go for the surprise. It felt more natural. I didnt notice with Angie, but with Harry I felt like I had been ripped off part of the birth experience - and no doubt will now too but I needed to be better prepared as money is tight all over and I have two other siblings expecting around the same time. One is having a boy and so we can now send Harrys baby clothes to them as we need girls stuff. Its a village thing.

    But if I could have gone the surprise without pondering costs and the like....

  4. #40
    Registered User
    Add ElleJay on Facebook Follow ElleJay On Twitter

    Jun 2007
    Western Australia

    BG - That's the kind of thing that I thought - That your not there just to see if its a boy or girl (at the birth)
    I can't wait to read you BA too BG

  5. #41
    Registered User

    Apr 2009
    in the garden

    I found out with all 4 of them...
    I'm surprised this time at the number of people who have said 'but why?' or who have said 'oh I guess if it was your first you would leave it be a surprise'...uh, no.
    Glad to know there are more like me out there! Like the others I just had to know! to plan etc, (and I'm totally with BloominRoses on the yellow, white & green thing).
    I can't imagine not knowing... it's just not me... my sister is due 10 days before me with her 1st & she isn't finding out..
    I really think it's up to you, I don't think it will matter once bub is here (and I always keep in mind that the scan might just be wrong!)

    Good luck, whatever you decide

  6. #42
    Registered User

    Mar 2006

    We haven't found out with either one and wouldn't have it any other way. I will never forget the look on DH's face after our DD was born and on my chest he looked at me with tears running down his cheeks and told me we had a little girl. Our gorgeous little Olivia was here. It meant the absolute world to me that he got to tell me when he did and not a stranger who just happened to be doing my 20 week ultrasound.
    I understand people who need to be organised though. I'm usually like that but I was still organised and I have a full wardrobe of pink and blue. All my DH had to do was wash it. DD was only in white for the first day. We returned all the blue stuff.
    I know some people think will I be disappointed if I know the sex or don't know the sex. Best of luck making the decision.

  7. #43
    Registered User

    Apr 2008

    (and I always keep in mind that the scan might just be wrong!)
    Yes this is very important! I have a friend who has been told the wrong gender TWICE - with her last 2 babies! She was told they were girls and she had boys both times. Only an amnio or cvs will give you 100% accuracy. So it is good to keep in mind.

  8. #44
    Platinum Member. Love a friend xxx

    Jan 2008
    hoppers crossing

    I had to find out,am too impatient but with my first they got it wrong anyways so it was still a surprise and this being my 2nd i had to find out and its obvious its a boy...that probably didnt help lol

  9. #45
    Registered User

    Apr 2009


    My hubby wants to know but will respect my decision either way. Next ultrasound we can find out but I have a feeling it will spoil my pregnancy .....make it longer and not as exciting...I don't know why I feel this as the whole thing is exciting but something is telling me to just wait...

    Did anyone wish they didn't find out the sex ???

  10. #46
    Registered User

    Nov 2005
    Sunshine Coast

    I loved having a pronoun - referring to him not it. We didn't share the name, but between DH & I we referred to him by name. So no regrets about finding out.