Definately sit down and have a talk with her, after my second m/c my friend was a few weeks off birth, and after hugging me and me stopping the tears, the first thing she said was - If you don't want me here, I can leave... she felt so bad that she had a cruisey pg, and I had lost my second. Just her being there was enough, she told me soooo many times that she understands if I can't go to the hospital, or be around her, but for me it was good, I could see that I do have a chance and her baby brought so much healing for me it was strange.

I think just talk to her, tell her how you feel, and make sure she knows that you are there fore her if she wants you to be there, and if not, she knows where you are when she is ready. No pressure... HTH