Obviously it depends on the degree of tearing but i was REALLY worried before birth about tearing and i did tear a tiny bit (it was through the skin and just nicked into the muscle, one midwife said she'd stitch it, the other said she wouldn't bother, i opted not to bother, it healed brilliantly) but it is seriously laughable to me now how worried i was about it compared to how "bad" it actually was.

I didn't feel the tear at all when it happened and i didn't feel it afterwards over the general hot swollen feeling down there from birth itself. I only felt the little cut specifically when i was putting my peri-gel (made up for me by my aromatherapist midwife) and it hurt WAY less than i'd expected (and the peri-gel felt SOOOOOOgood ).

I think i was really worried about damage to my vagina before birth but after birth i saw my vagina in a new way. It had gone from being a really sensitive and delicate part of me to being an enduring, strong, amazing organ. Somehow the little cut was a manifestation of my triumph during birth, a little war wound from the challenge me and my body and my baby met head on and rose to triumphantly. Like tearing gave me the realisations that vaginas are designed to birth and even if they tear a bit, they are designed to heal too. I guess it's part of my Pollyanna syndrome (hopeless optimism) but i am SO unworried about tearing next time around. Before it felt like a big thing, but the achievment of birth afterwards was so much bigger.

Bx