I'm going to be a single mum....

[Arimeh]

Hey Jessey congrats on the birth of your beautiful girl.

If you ever need support or a room until you get on your feet, my door is always open. I'm on the Sunshine Coast too.

[smiles4u]

CONGRATULATIONS ON THE BIRTH OF YOUR PRECIOUS DAUGHTER

I LOVE HER NAME " LYLA " ... SO BEAUTIFUL & WHAT A BEAUTIFUL MUMMY SHE HAS

I have a little story for you Jesse, ... I hope it helps you at least a little about your situation

I too know a little girl named LYLA she is from my previous Mother's group, she is a May baby too. She turns " 2 " later this Month. Sadly her Daddy (who was only 25) passed away last November from an 8mth battle with cancer And also sadly she will never know her Daddy as she is too young to remember him

... I guess what I'm trying to say is that your little LYLA is so lucky that her Daddy is on this planet & hopefully he will be part of " her " life in someway as she so deserves that right

HE is so not worthy of you, & like some other members have mentioned - maybe you could get some HELP from the SALVOS, etc inregards to accomodation & some sort of support. You should NOT have to feel ' trapped ' living with him, even it's for a short time.

We are all HERE to help you with any advice & support that we can

... ENJOY YOUR GORGEOUS BABY GIRL !!!!!!!

[Blixie]

once again thank you all for your supportive posts.

smiles4u - cancer is a horrible horrible disease especially at such a young age, poor little girl not being able to know her daddy

Gudism - your a very kind person

[smiles4u]

JESSEY ... I too so agree that GUDISM would have to be the " Kindest " member I have ever come across on this site

... Anyone, who happens upon her advice & loveliness should very much consider themselves lucky :goodluck2:

Heartfelt wishes to you JESS, enjoy these precious times with your little baby girl

... It truely goes so fast, ... in a blink of an eye my own daughter turned " 2 " last Tues & I so miss those baby days ( especially that sweet bubba smell )!!

[Arimeh]

Aw shucks guys, you'll make me blush!!!!

I'm no kinder than anybody else. I mean, if you can't help out someone in need... why are you on this earth? That's just my way of thinking anyway... always happy to help if I can!!!

And Jess, my offer was genuine. We have a spare room

A couple of other girls on here and me try to get together at Cotton Tree Park some weeks, so if you are near there, please come and join us

[Maree]

Jess,

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful daughter. I have been thinking about you too! I know exactly what you mean, about being in a 'house' but it not feeling like home. I'm sorry you feel that way; I know it hurts. You are grieving the loss of one relationship and enjoying the beginning of a new one. Plus, with hormone changes, your feelings are bound to be all over the place at the moment. Well done for keeping in touch with all of us here. We are thinking of you and sending you many positive thoughts and wishes.

[Blixie]

How do you stop loving someone you thought you were going to be with forever?
I am so damn sick of everyone expecting me to be over it by now! I don't just have a switch to turn off my feelings, i have loved him for a long time and its going to take a while for me to let him go, i do my best not to get upset and cry because i don't want to upset Lyla but its so damn hard seeing him all the time and knowing he's not mine.
I want to hug him sooo bad, sometimes i forget we aren't together anymore and then i remember and it hurts so much.
I am getting more and more down everyday, i've lost my apetite (sp?) completely so i have to FORCE myself to eat... I want to stop loving him but i don't know how...

[Blixie]

ashleajayne - my sister was pressured into a termination almost 3 years ago now and she thinks i just had a baby to make her feel bad why i would do that i dont know but that's what she thinks...

And just letting everyone know, i'm moving in with my dad until i find a place of my own, i wont have access to the net for a while though so yeah... Am really scared that me leaving is going to cause Geoff not to spend any time with Lyla though, i feel like i'm taking her away from him... I just dont know what the right thing to do in this situation is. I dont think there really is a "right thing" but i'm pretty sure this is as close as i'll get

[Lulu]

Oh babe - HE is taking himself away from her. Not you.

I'm glad you can get away from the situation for now, if you can, try to think about yourself a little more. It might sound weird but YOU are the most important person here - you need a clear headspace to make the right decisions for you and Lyla.

I gotta hand it to you, you are doing a great job amidst a cr@ppy situation, it can only get better from here. We will miss you when you are gone, please come back when you can for some BB love!

[melham74]

hope things start to look up for you soon hun if you ever feel like comming to Brissy we have a spare room aswell and you and lyla are both welcome anytime

[BhoysGirl]

Jessey,

I'm a bit like Sarah, I've been reading through this thread & I just can't get it out of my mind. So I figured I'd give you my 2cents of support as well.

Firstly - congratulations on birthing Lyla, she's an absolutely beautiful baby. And I love her name

Secondly - I think that the right thing to do is to look after yourself & your needs, and by extension, Lyla. I've kissed my fair share of "frogs", and I know exactly how heartbreaking it can be when you think that you've found the love of your life & they decide they don't feel the same way, although I didn't have the extra emotional stress of having a baby at those stages. But I can say with almost 150% certainty, that there is never a good reason to stay with someone who doesn't love you, and that in time, windows & doors always open. Geoff will always be Lyla's dad, but he needs to grow up & accept this responsibility, which IMHO, is unfortunately a place that he has to get to by himself, and from what you've written, it doesn't sound like he really wants to be involved in the way a dad should be, at least not yet. But I hope for all your sakes he works it out.

Staying with your Dad sounds like a good plan. I don't (obviously) know what your relationship is like with him, but in my experience, the grandparent/grandchild relationship is really special, so it could be a fantastic chance for Lyla to really experience "family", at least I hope it is. And hopefully your Dad will be able to support you emotionally as well, even if he's not necessarily so good at nappy changes (I know my dad isn't).

Anyway, take great care of yourself, I hope that it all starts to look up for you, and come back to BB as soon as you can.

[Arimeh]

I'm glad you have made a decision for you and Lyla, Jess.
My offer will always stand, and my door will always remain open (and you wouldn't be a burden, please don't think like that).
If you want to catch up on a tuesday or thursday for coffee and a chat let me know...
Take care.
xx