hello chicken well on the work front the meeting was a total waste of time they still dont no what they are doing they said VW might buy us or another department might take us on or get rid of us completley but even if we go to another department they want at least 3 to 4 people to go so we will see they have to tell us leagaly what is going on in the next 2 weeks so for now just sit tight i suppose. as to puppy i am loving it apart from the play nipping he just doesnt stop biteing it is really annoying but he is still young and i am taking him to puppy classes which will be good also the lady who runs the puppy classes asked if i had any children and i said i have a 4yr old boy and she said brilliant as i am looking for children aged 4 to 8 to do a tv programme on cbeebies with the there dogs so fingers crossed it goes a head and harvey will be a little star on the childrens tv programme i hope it all goes to plan.
I really hope that those eggs are ready and that it can happern on the wednesday or thursday i have everything crossed for you that it all works and you get your BFP this month it would be so good if we got BFP on the same month ah.
and sofy how you doing today honey i am thinking of you and sending lots of to you hope you are ok and that the day isnt to upsetting take care.
17th was okay like you said, but its been worse since. i feel crap all i wanna do is hold my baby but no i cant i no DH feels it to cos he seems really quiet.
O my god you might have a little star on your hands (harvey) how exciting you will have to let me know what happens with that. are you still taking the ovulex?? are you seeing any signs of them working? just think in 2 weeks time hopefully you will know whats going to happen with work?? i really hope nothing happens to you and you get to stay, its bloody terrible timing its soooo close to christmas, what a great time to be doing this to your employee's, what idiots.
Sofy
thank you sweetie for letting us know how the 17th went
i wish there was something i could say or do to take away this pain your feeling, i am so sorry darl. go and look into dh eyes and tell him that you love him and feel the pain that he is feeling too and just hold each other and love each other like crazy to help you both through this tough time. please know that we are here for you no matter what.
Well i am on my last day of clomid tablets, my scan is monday so hopefully something is happening down there, i am a bit worried that there wont be any eggs there or something as i am only on 25mg of clomid because i ohss on 50mg so i have been stressing out that cos i am on half the dose i wont make eggs, hahaha silly i know, either way i will know monday. Dp went back to work today so its back to stressing and being scared, i know i say this all the time but god i miss him, i really dont know how much more i can take, i am not handleing this very well i am sick of being alone i miss being apart of his life and he is missing out on alot in mine and dd lives, i would do anything to have him home EVERY NIGHT. ok i will stop there other wise i will just keep going on and on.
i feel for you so much it is hard and like i said its after the day that you feel it most you just keep imagineing what it would have been like to have this new baby in your arms to look after to hear it cry to change its bum to feed it to take it for walks to watch its first steps and first words god i am getting choked up its just so upseting life is just crap at times and you always seem to think why did it happen to my baby well we are hear when you feel ready to talk just take time and make sure you and DH give each other all the cuddles in the world and talk about how you feel take care. xxx
Mummy2chloe
Yeh i am still taking ovulex almost finnished mt secound tub going on to the 3rd not sure if they are working but i strated taking them when my periods were all over the place and since taking them they seem to be getting back on track i come on on time this month then i think they have helped with that also i am less stressy and i am sure i ovulate for longer than usual so i do think they might be working but untill i get that BFP i cant say for sure hopefully i will get one this month i am due on around the 1st to 4th of nov. So how did it go today with the scan i really hope you have some good new to tell me and that the eggs are all good i have my fingers crossed for you. and as to DP i feel for you i would hate it you are so brave to stay on your own i would go crazy is there anyway he could change job to be closer how good would that be him coming home every night you would feel so much better anyway i had better do some work let me know how scan went.
It"s good that your still on the ovulex tablets and its good that your seeing some results with your af becoming more regular. Hopefully you will recieve a beautiful bfp this month
Do you have any news about your job?? my god you poor thing you must be sooo stressed
Well had my scan yesterday and i have one egg that is 20mm in size (biggest one i have made ever) and another one that is 16/17mm in size, so i have to have my injection tonight and we inseminate thursday, so happy that i actually made some eggs as i was pretty worried that only being on 25mg of clomid i wouldnt make anything, but i have 2 gorgeous little ones waiting there for me. and fs told me that by thursday the 2 eggs would of had another two days of growing so they should be bigger and busting to get out
i might not be on for a few days as i have to go away after getting inseminated, but as soon as we get back i will tell you how things went.
yeh i am so happy you have some good waiting i have everything crossed for you and the biggest ones yet how good is that well make sure you let me know how it all goes hoe good would it be if we both got a BFP i really hope we do i have a feeling i wont i think that i am to big to get pregnant i still havent being docs so i am gonna try go today and mention about having a blood test and that i have now being trying for a yr and if there is anything they can do to help me lose weight i just feel a little fed up with myself and when i get down i eat its a visous circle that i need to get of. i will find out 2morrow or thurday if i am getting made redundant so fingers crossed i dont as i dont want the hassel of it all. i do feel a little stressed but i will try my hardest not to i went and done loads of xmas shopping yesterday which made me feel good if i feel stressed or upset the things that help is eating and retail therapy anyway i am gonna go done no work yet i just cant get into it at the min but everyone is the same. good luck with everything
i am back and everything went well, nathan's sperm count came back perfect which is awesome, so now i just sit and wait for the next 2 weeks and with any luck will have a bfp at the end of it. how are things with you?? did you end up getting into the doc's? i know what you mean about emotional eating, i use to be like that but then something just clicked in my head one day, i got the ****s with myself and just started to change my life, started weight watchers and playing tennis and just stuck with it and ended up losing 25 kilo's. i really hope the doctor can help you, and just know that i am always here for you if you ever want to chat, please feel free to pm me anytime. anyway i better go i have had a huge day ( hopefully with any luck, our swimmers have found my fat eggs)
take care chicken
Glad to hear it all went well i really hope you get that well deserved BFP in 2 weeks you will have to let us all no. I didnt get made redundant which is such a relief so i can relax a bit now and not panic about it also i didnt get chance to go docs as my sister rang me at work telling me her youngest daughter amy who is 3 got taken to hospital cos she swallowed a penny and it was stuck in her chest so i had to go to hospital and get her other daughter abi but she is fine now they had to operate on her but when they did the penny had moved into her tummy so we are now waiting for her to poo it out but it has been 4 or 5 days and it still hasnt come my sister has to take her back to the hospital if it doesnt come out int he next 2 days bless her. i will have to go docs sometime this week as i really want to get some answers. i really hope i get what you got where something just clicks and i loose the weight i was thinking about getting the stomache band i no its a bit extream but i feel like i need to do something. anyway let me no how those swimmers get on ha ha
sorry haven't really been up to doing much the past week, feeling much better now and have been keeping up to date with you guys.
mummy2chloe,
so happy for you, i you have the very soon. this may seem like the longest 2 weeks of your life i know i did, but fingers crossed it will be well worth it.
munchy,
its great to know that you are not being made redundant. at least you can relax now maybe this will help your cycle aswell. did you say af is due 1st nov? i'll have my finger crossed for you aswell. i hope to see 2 when i go online next week!!
not a lot has been happening with me lately. iv'e had my good days and bad days. i've started my weight watchers diet today. iv'e put on loads of wieght round my belly and for my injections to work well next month i think i should lose a bit. i just hope i ca stick to it.
i'm still on mat leave but really missing work. i can't go back just yet cos i won't get paid when i start my fertility treatment again and have to be off every other day with scans. i'm too used to my luxuries to try and budget on DH's pay! hopefully if i do get pg then 30 wks of bedrest for me.
it's been so good hearing your positive news. take care
sofy x x
its great to hear from you was woundering where you had got to glad to hear you are feeling better about things i pray we all get a BFP real soon as to work take as much time as you need i went back after 8 wks from the day of finding out all her problems which when i look at it isnt a long time really considering i had to have lots of scans at a special hospital in london and have the needle thing put through my tummy to stop my baby girls heart (that was the hardest thing ever) and then give birth and have the funeral and move house it was hard time when i think back to it. well i hope it all works out for you honey i have everything crossed for you aswell and hope the diet goes well i was with slimming world but gave up ages ago i realy need to loose some weight i just find it so hard.
Mummy2chloe
i went to the docs at last and i have a bt booked in for next tue which will look at my hormones and everything and then on day 21 of cycle they want to do another bt to make sure i am ovulating if they all come back good then there is no reason for me not to fall pregnant i said to him what about my weight and he said i am only 23 so it shouldnt matter he said if i was in my 40s and was overweight then maybe it could be my weight so that made me feel a little better but i still really do need to loose a couple of stone at least i want to loose 7 in total but start off at one at a time i suppose also i hope you have some good news to be telling me soon.
Munchy thats great news about the doc, with any luck the bt that they are doing will reveal something so they can get you back on track and making gorgeous babies again. please let me know how you go, i will be thinking of you. how is the weight loss going?? like you said take it one step at a time i am so proud of you
Sofy how are you going hun?? its great to see you back in here posting
thanks so much for your best wishes and i totally agree with you the tww sucks big time
well as for me, not much to report really. i have been using the pesseries and they are still yukky, i have put on 4 kilos in one week, i have cramps i am bloated and my boobs are huge. but these are all the side effects of the pessaries. I dont think we are pregnant, i have been through a few iui now and i feel the same as the others cycles, so i dont think we are pregnant. but in a way a feel ok about that. i sort of feel like i am coming to the end of my road with ttc, i have been at it for almost 6yrs now and i am sick of it, i want to get my old life back. i should be focusing on the gorgeous child i have and not focus on the one i cant have. i am so god dam luck to have such an awesome daughter so i think its time to give up on ttc and just enjoy my life with my dd & dp, does that make sense??
will stop talking now sorry
i totally no what you mean about coming to the end of your TTC i have only been trying for a yr and there has been times where i thought i just want to give up it takes over your life i find all i do is talk about it saying to everyone i wish i was pregnant it is hard maybe you could take a break for a yr and think about trying i really really hope you get your bfp 6 yrs is a long time you deserve it so much i have everything crossed for you. i cant wait to find out whats going on with my i came on on fri but my af are so much better not as heavey they seem to be different the last 2 af's now have been good not to heavey and only lasting 5 days instead of 7 so fingers crossed it means that my body is sorting itself out. as to dieting havent started yet my friends mum done a diet through her gp it costs 1000 pounds which is an awful lot but it is for 14 wks and you can loose like 4 stone you cant have any food only the sahats they give you which are shakes and soups and nut bars and you have councelling every week and group theropy and they train you how to eat peoperly so i might do it just need to have a serious think about it. also i had to go docs again as my hand swelled up i have RSI repetative strain injury so have to wear a splint it is very annoying also i decorated my kitchen over the weekend and guess what colour it is PINK i thought it was cream with a hint of pink but now it is on the walls it is deffinaltly pink but looks so good i love it so much just need to do tilling now anyway i keep talking so i will shut up now ha ha let me know how your getting on also when can you do a HPT?
If there isn't no AF there still could be some good news. with regards to giving up trying to conceive. i totally understand where your coming from. my dh and i decided to stop after 5yrs of trying, just before we started our last cycle and guess what we conceived with Mustafa our little angel! maybe he was a sign not to give up... but, only you and dp can decide what you want i know it kinda takes over your life and you talk to everyone about pregnancy. iv'e got great friends who tell me to shut up when i get to the annoying point. who knows maybe the brerak might relax you and being stress free is being part of the medication cycle if that makes sense.
just a quick one from me to let you know that af arivved today
i knew she was coming for last few days, could just feel it
definantly giving ttc a break for awhile, but will come on bb everyday and will still be in here talking to you lovely ladies
cant go anywhere yet anyway, not until you girls get bfp and then i might have to stalk you over in the preggers section, wont be able to post in there cos i am not pregnant but i will still be able to read your post and keep an eye on you
oh honey i really thought this was your month i had everything crossed for you hope your not feeling to sad it is so dissapointing when your AF arrives well i dont blame you with giving the TTC a little break as it does get in the way of everything you will probably start to feel a little better and feel like you are starting to get your life back again iykwim. well i feel a little down today i have been feeling a little down for a few days and then realised what day it is today it is a yr that my little girl should have been born 12 nov was my due date so if only she had being born it would have been her 1st birthday just cant stop thinking about her and feel like everyone has forgotten about her does that make sense. also i went through all of harveys toys to make room for christmas ones and i came across alot of baby ones so i was putting them all in the loft and harvey asked why i said to save them incase you have a brother or sister one day i just feel sad for him as well that he is missing out on having his little sister around god i am chocking up sorry guys just wanted to say how i was feeling i had better go now at work and dont want to be crying. also my doc said my blood test for hormones were all normal which i was really surprised at but its good news i suppose just gotta find out if i am ovulating now.
:hugs: today must be a hard day for you, wish i could be there for you, i completely understand what you are saying about your gorgeous little girl and not wanting her to be forgotten, but with everything you have told me about, with the tattoo and the christmas present you wanted dh to get you that would remind you of her, with all that there is no way your little girl will ever be forgotten, maybe the people that are close to you might not want to mention it incase it makes it harder on you, as it is they would already know that your having a hard time with ttc and your work plus your trying to lose weight, they might not want to make things harder on you by bringing it up, so they might be waiting to see if you bring it up and if your up for talking about it and stuff do you know what i mean??
as for feeling sad about not having a bro/sis for harvey i truely understand what your saying, chloe is always saying to me, "when we have a baby i am going to bath it and feed it and push the pram" and it just breaks my heart cos she is nearly 6 by the time i have a baby "if" i ever have a baby chloe will be grown up, i always wanted to have my kids close in age but that was taken out of my hands many years ago.
its good that your hormones are fine, thats something you can cross off your list, like you said lets see how or if your ovulating, you know how to tell when your ovulating and stuff?? you know with your cervical mucus? are you into charting your cycle?? do you have any ovulation kits?? if you dont maybe you should buy some so you can keep an eye on when your going to O.
best of luck please keep in touch i am always thinking about you sweetie
Thanks for your reply you have said all of the right things my family are probably waiting for me to say something the thing is i hate crying infront of people as i dont want to make people around me feel sad i think its my problem and i dont want to burden them with it i am the sort of person who puts on a front and acts all happy when deep down i am falling apart. i think i am just having a bad day and will probably feel alot better 2morrow. what you said about chloe i would cry so much i feel like you that harvey will be all grown up by the time i have another baby i always wanted 3 yr between my kids which would have been if brooklyn was healthy but hopefully i will fall pregers soon i had a couple of O tests that my friend gave me and i done them for the first 2 months and they came up that i was O so i think i still do but i might go and buy some and start doing it again. well tonight i am going to help my sister decorate but i want to avoid it cos i think i will just be feeling upset and will drag her down with me but i no she really needs help decorating her bedroom so i think i will go.
i know what you mean about putting on a front, i am doing it now ( not with you of course) i just had a failed cycle AGAIN and none of my family or friends understand why i am STILL upset, they must think that you just get over it in a matter of a day or two, i mean oh my god i still have af so every time i go to the toilet its a bloody reminder that it didnt work, it just seems easier to put on a happy face and pretend that your fine rather then let them see that your heart is breaking to the point that it hurts to breath, and not just that the replies that you get from people when they find out that your not pregnant just p*sses me off, i hate people say "oh well just relax it will happen eventually" my god i could just slap these people for saying that, but anyway i wont keep going on, i think you understand what i am saying ha ha ha
as for getting more O kits, thats a great idea it will help and you wont have to do the guessing game when your close to ovulating, i think you can buy like a 20 or 30 pack on ebay for cheap
and as for going to your sisters to help decorate her bathroom, it might be a good idea to go over there, at least it gets you out of the house and you never know it might be your sisters way of trying to help you get through this very tough day, plus it might give you an opportunity to have a heart to heart with your sister about everything thats going on in your life and about brooklyn, you never know you go over to your sisters feeling very sad and down and you might end up leaving feeling alot better and maybe a little closer to your sister, but darling if you feel that your not up for going out and you would rather be at home, then i understand that aswell, maybe you ,dh and harvey could do something tonight, to show brooklyn that she is still very much appart of your lives and that the love and bond that you feel for her is still VERY much there.
sweet heart if you want to pm me please feel free to, i will always be here for you ok no matter what.
let me know how you go, i will be thinking of you mate
stay stong darlin
Reply With Quotei no DH feels it to cos he seems really quiet.
Registered User
to you hope you are ok and that the day isnt to upsetting take care.
so its back to stressing and being scared, i know i say this all the time but god i miss him, i really dont know how much more i can take, i am not handleing this very well i am sick of being alone i miss being apart of his life and he is missing out on alot in mine and dd lives, i would do anything to have him home EVERY NIGHT. ok i will stop there other wise i will just keep going on and on.
i am so happy you have some good
waiting i have everything crossed for you and the biggest ones yet how good is that well make sure you let me know how it all goes hoe good would it be if we both got a BFP i really hope we do i have a feeling i wont i think that i am to big to get pregnant i still havent being docs so i am gonna try go today and mention about having a blood test and that i have now being trying for a yr and if there is anything they can do to help me lose weight i just feel a little fed up with myself and when i get down i eat its a visous circle that i need to get of. i will find out 2morrow or thurday if i am getting made redundant so fingers crossed i dont as i dont want the hassel of it all. i do feel a little stressed but i will try my hardest not to i went and done loads of xmas shopping yesterday which made me feel good if i feel stressed or upset the things that help is eating and retail therapy anyway i am gonna go done no work yet i just cant get into it at the min but everyone is the same. good luck with everything
you have the
very soon. this may seem like the longest 2 weeks of your life i know i did, but fingers crossed it will be well worth it.
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