I lost our baby in July 2003. I think of that bub all the time, especially on January 20 which was my due date. My rels think too that I should put it behind me and to some degree I have but it will always be there. I had to have a termination because I needed chemo for a breast cancer diagnosis when I was 9 weeks pregnant so it wasn't a miscarrage as such. I still greive for what could have been and feel desperately guilty that I couldn't save my baby and that I had to choose it's life over my own.

Don't listen to people when they tell you you'll get over it or once you have another baby you'll forget. I don't believe you ever do. The grief changes to acceptance over time but the hurt is always there. It's wondering what the baby would have looked like, who nose would she or he have had, what would be her first words....

Feel sad, cry, yell, do whatever you need to do to process your grief, let it come when it comes and allow yourself to feel the loss.

In time the paiian will lessen but you'll always remember your precious angels. It's all part of being a Mummy.

Be kind to yourself and take care. My thoughts and understanding are with you.