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Thread: Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ August 2006

  1. #19

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    You do inspire me, and best of all you all make me laugh, which is what I need more than anything at the moment! I'm starting to realise that this is one hard road, and I can't just pick myself up, dust myself off, and move right along like I thought I could. I gave myself a period of time to grieve and then thought I would be okay. WRONG! I don't think I am depressed, but I am finding life a bit hard. I fainted at work on Monday, was semi-concious for awhile (don't remember it myself). There's nothing wrong with me, but work think there is, so gave me today and tomorrow off. I said yes, not because I'm sick, but because I need some 'me' time. I feel a bit guilty, but I'll just have to get over that, they'll be fine without me.



    It gives me hope to be in here with all you wonderful girls, and makes me feel much more normal about my own emotions. Thanks so much for your concern Lisa. You're right, being sad doesn't lessen the desire for a baby of my own, I want one so much sometimes it hurts! As I'm sure you all know! I am just watching out and waiting for those who will be testing soon......... It's nice to share others' joy!

  2. #20
    goldilocks Guest

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    Thanks Keen, so do I!

    Sez, isn't it funny how differently our bodies are behaving considering we both had D&C's on the same day! LOL The spotting is really annoying...it's been 30 days & counting :eek: WTF??!!! I hope that AF arrives for you soon, sweets. So you're going to wait for another cycle to pass before TTC? That's scary about passing out at work! Do you have any idea what happened? I think it's a good thing that work told you to have a few days off. You'll feel so much better for it, so don't you dare feel guilty!

    I completely understand how you're feeling about realising the road is harder than you first thought. I thought I was OK too but the last few weeks have been awful...one minute I'm ok, the next I'm desperately sad. DH took me out on a 'date' last night to cheer me up. Such a sweet man I don't feel depressed either but sometimes the pain in my heart is almost too much to bear. We will get there together, honey. Remember we're all for each other to make the journey easier to bear!

    Lisa, your symptoms sound great! A lot of women 'feel' pg very early after conceiving and I'm hoping you're one of them. It's amazing how many women get colds around the time they conceive too...I remember how run down I felt! I have everything crossed for you this month, my sweet!

    Love
    Belle
    -xxxooo-

  3. #21

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    Lisa, I am holding out all hopes that you are not suffering from flu symptoms but the lovely symptoms we are all hoping for !

  4. #22

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    Sez, it is a long road, and its not something you really 'get over' you just learnt to live with it over time. Its good that work has given you some time off, so you can have 'you' time and rest up, your body too needs time to recover. I find all the women here really inspiring and Im so glad that I have them to come to in my times of sadness and happiness too. It brings a sense of comfort knowing that we all understand each other, as that is often hard to find in our normal lives. Take care of yourself sweety, and just know that its ok to be sad and its ok to feel good and positive about ttc again.

    Belle - still spotting after 30 days! Have you talked to your gp or you going to just ride it out and hope its clears up itself soon? I think you are such a strong and positive woman and you really are a treasure to have around (although I would have preferred to meet you in the pg threads IYKWIM?) Your dh sounds soo sweet and date night sounds like fun, me and dh do that occasionally and its a nice change from day to day life.

    Keen - thanks hun, and even if im not pg its good to feel a little hope every know and then. When are you due for testing? If you do get a bfp, im going to throw the biggest party this thread has ever seen! Im praying with all my heart that you a growing a little one in there.

    Jayne - PMSL at pinching your nipples!! I think Im going to be exactly the same as you, and its so wonderful that you have made that first step in buying something for your little one. Ive never bought anything even when I was pg - so I cant wait for that!

    Oh I forgot to tell you gals....I had a coffee reading by this little old lady the other day...within two seconds she looked at me and said 'your going to have a baby', 'the stork is here, you cant escape it..it will happen within 3 months'... although it was great to hear, im a little sceptical though , but I hope she was right,a nd one of my friends called me the other day asking if I had any 'news' for her, when I asked why she would ask that, she said she'd had a dream about me and had the feeling that I was pg. A little bit freaky I think but again, not something to pin your hopes on.

    The thread has been quiet these two days..I hope everyone is undertaknig some serious baby making or getting bfp's that they are too busy to come and play!

  5. #23

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    Hello everyone,

    Just popping in to see how everyone is going and hoping I will see some BFPs in here soon.

    Lisa, I have everything crossed that you may be pg. There a few girls who will be leaving the PAML ark soon so there will be a few empty seats. Good luck.

    Belle, I hope the spotting eases up soon for you. I rmember spotting for just over a month after I had a D&C with my first m/c.

    Keen, I have everything crossed for you too matey. You really deserve a BFP with a sticky little bean. i am thinking of you.

    Sarah, congrats on becoming an Aunty. How are you going??

    Tanya, how are you going??

    Michelle, how are you?? Any sign of a BFP for you?? I hope so.

    Naomi, how are you going matey?? I have been thinking of you lately, hope all is going ok with you.

    Hello to everyone else.

  6. #24

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    Lisa!! Wow!! Sounds like you may be due for a BFP veeeery soon!! I hope so!

    Keen how are you? We won't be cycle buddies this cycle... I am still to O...

    A BFN on the OPK again for me today... I only have one left (but I'll make it two ) so hopefully I get a ++ on one of the two. I am hoping for a Sunday O as I know a lady who does gender predictions and she says that Sunday is a very stong 'Boy' day . Sounds weird I know, but worth a try.

    TL
    Tanya

  7. #25

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    Hi Girls,

    A big thanks to everyone on your congratulations on the birth of my neice! May we all be so blessed with healthy and happy babies in nine months time!

    Lisa, I was reading about your symptoms and thinking maybe you are right that you could have a flu or something coming on (i know that you are pregnant - you just have to be) and then i thought about the sore bb's...there is no way that this could be related to illness lol so bring on more symptoms for you chicken!!!!! How many days until you test?

    Keen, How are you going with the 2ww...everyday feel like its going forever? I really wish that your testing day arrives in the blink of an eye and of course that you get that BFP and are holding your precious baby in 9 months. Good Luck i will be thinking of you.

    Belle, Grrrr at that naughty spotting it must be driving you mad. LOL about you asking your DH when AF was due for you. Mine used to know roughly the week but i have him fooled and now he reckons he doesnt know where we are at. My SIL has twin girls, they are great. I came into the family when they were 4 years old so i have known them most of their lives.

    Sez, I really feel for the way you are feeling at the moment. Sounds as though these couple of days off work will be good for you. Lisa is right, we never stop greiving for our babies, we just somehow manage to find a way to remember them with love and sadness in our everyday lives. It has only been such a short time since you lost your baby so go easy on yourself. All of your feelings are normal, you lost a baby which you loved dearly so you cant expect yourself just to pick yourself up and get on with it. Loving and losing that baby was a life changing experience for you...one which we are all here to help you get through. I lost Katelyn over 2 years ago (its her due date at the end of this month) and there is not a day go past that i dont remember the miracle of her life. I give her ashes a hug and a kiss everyday and tell her how much she is loved and missed. Over time i have written several letters to her telling her my feelings and maybe this is something that could help you...its just a suggestion but just know that all of your feelings are entirely normal, there will be good and bad days (there always will) but we are here for you all the way. Hang in there.

    Hi to everyone else of you who are MIA...Michelle you must be testing soon how are you going chook?

    Lots of Love Sarah xx

  8. #26

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    Hello Ladies,

    Lisa - I have got butterflies in my tummy for you. Excited and happy butterflies. I have a good feeling for you. Sometimes when I dream things they come true, so your gf could be right about you being pg! I had a dream that my sister's bf was pg and about 2 weeks later she told my sister she was!!!! Lets look at this realistically, there is NO way that little eggy could have slipped away from the tens of thousands of horny little wrigglies that were waiting to catch her!

    Sarah - I think that's a fantastic idea about you writing letters to Katelyn. I have to admit, I shed a little tear when I read about you giving her a little kiss and a huggle and whispering her a little promise. That just breaks my heart. Nobody should ever have to do that, let alone such beautiful people like yourself and too many others that I have met through BB. It makes me so angry that our children are taken away from us, but I just try and tell myself that they are destined for better things than this world and only the best are chosen to go.

    Belle - March yourself off to the doctor my lovely. Spotting for 30 days must be giving you the willies by now. Come on, get it sorted, the woman in PAML are vacating very quickly at the moment and there is a chair marked for you!!!

    Keen - Yay on the TWW! WOO HOO! Lets hope we have a double-eviction very soon with you & Lisa. I hope everybody else comes too, but at the moment you two are in the TWW.

    Michelle - Where are you my possum? I'm really thinking about you and hope that you're ok. I want you to know that you're in my thoughts and I wish good things for you.

    I'm feeling quite pleased with myself but a little bit worried about when DH comes home. I bought myself a pair of $140 sunglasses. :eek: Wish me luck! LOL.

    Jayne

  9. #27

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    Hi Again Guys,

    Lisa, Forgot to tell you that a few days before i was due to test with Lucy my Dad (whom i worked with at the time) told me that he had dream that i was pregnant again..i just laughed lol but was thinking holy C**P how would he know i didnt even know but then i tested a few days later and well as you know now i have Lucy. Throughout her pregnancy he had 3 dreams that she was a girl (we didnt know until she was born) along with other weird things like she could tuck herself in when she was a newborn and at 2 months of age ate sandwichs for lunch lol funnily enough she has always been a great sleeper and eater. I wonder if he will tell me again this time that i am pregnant before i even get that BFP. I also had a dream after i had Katelyn (only about 2 weeks after) that i was on the operating table holding both Katelyn and another newborn baby girl that had just been born by CS. Weird i know because Lucy was actually born by CS...but it gave me hope in the mean time that i would go on to have another baby. Anyway i hope that your dreams comes true in about 7 or so days!!!!

    Hey Kazz, Missed your post before, I am doing just fine thanks, what about you? You lovely chook for popping in to support everyone! Declan is such a little cutie.

    Tanya, Bummer on the -OPK. How do you make them two? Did you cut it in half? Hopefully you will O on Sunday then! and bring on that BFP.

    Jayne, I meant to say before about your sore nips, I used to push on my BB's to see if they were still sore (they were never really sore) and when they were i used to think are they just sore because i was pushing on them lol its a double edged sword all this stuff isnt it. Maybe i should shut up about that now...sometimes i can be too honest LOL. Thanks for what you said about Katelyn. You are right our children should never be taken from us. It has just come to me now that my grief for Katelyn is an ever evolving thing, it changes from day to day and also from year to year but the essence of it is still the same. I know its hard to have her ashes there and not her but then i am so thankful that i do have her ashes to talk too, makes me feel like she is sort of still here IYKWIM.

    I must tell you guys that everyday of my life i feel so blessed to be mum to my little Lucy she really is the light of my life and i just dont know where i would be without her. I feel that after having Katelyn i didnt actually breath until Lucy was in my arms. I wish all of you the very best in getting your BFP's. You all deserve them above me because i have already been blessed with such a wonderful, gorgeous little girl. At times i think that i might just be tempting a bad fate trying again when i am already so lucky to have my girl. She just came up and gave me a huge hug and lots of kisses which are just way to cute to even describe and i had a tear and thought of my Katelyn who is with me each day but not here with me. None of us should have to travel this road we all deserve the babies that we lost and i wish that you all experience the joy of holding your own living breathing baby very soon...if i could give it to you in a heartbeat i would. Good Luck girls BRING ON THOSE BFP'S

    Love Sarah xx

  10. #28

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    Hi girls!!! On night shift and distracting myself from even thinking about the 2ww I have been working some extra shifts because we are so short staffed and with sick leave because of winter. And it is a good excuse not to think about testing coming up fast.

    I am fine and not experiencing a single symptom to speak of So .... I have no idea what is happening. I am due for AF around Monday so I will not be testing before then. I hate the let down feeling of a negative.

    Lisa - oooooh, those symptoms could be positive. Maybe you should work as many shifts as me to distract you from the torture of waiting LOL. I have also had a friend at work ask me this week if I am pregnant because she had a dream I was. She tells me she has been accurate previously in dreaming before so I can only hope. This is the 4th cycle of clomid which is when I conceived with Caitlyn. Fingers crossed.

    Jayne - it is so sweet you miss me and are sending me lots of good thoughts (and all the other girls who have noticed my MIA) We miss having you around here too. It is good to see that you are starting to *enjoy* this pregancy. I am sending you positive vibes for the next round of tests and the U/S. Time is really flying by (from this end anyway). I hope the sunnies didn't get you into trouble!!

    Sarah - you just made me well up with tears (and I'm at work!!!!) Your journey is so much like mine and I aspire to have your blessing. Lucy sounds like such a sweet little thing and I am sure her big sister is very proud of her. I also give Caitlyn's ashes a hug regularly. I am sure there are people who think it is a little odd but it makes me feel like she is still with us and a very special part of our family. She sits on the sideboard in the lounge room near a photo of my niece and nephew.

    Belle - off damn spot(ting) (only makes sense if you know Shakespeare ) I hope things start to settle for you soon.

    Keen - thinking of you in the TWW

    Tanya - when do you think you are due to O or are you irregular?? Keep testing (or just keep BDing!!)

    A big hello to everyone else and I'll be back later (got a patient to attend to!!!)
    Last edited by Michelle71; August 11th, 2006 at 07:47 AM.

  11. #29

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    Good Luck Michelle, Keen and all the rest of you lovely ladies that are testing soon.



    Belle i hope all the spotting slows down soon and you are giving us some wonderful news soon. Always thinking of you.

  12. #30

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    Hey girls...

    Michelle, the passed two cycles I have O'ed on CD 15 and 16 (in reverse order) this cycle I am not Oing until day 20 something... My cycles have always been a bit like this... bit annoying!!
    Glad to hear that night shift is keeping your mind off the tww.... that and the money would be the only up sides to night shift?

    Sarah.... awwwww, don't our kids bring out the best in us!! I have to admit that since my m/c I feel even more blessed to have my girls!! And the loss has made me want another little bundle soooo much more!!
    Oh, and yeah, I have a habbit of making more tests for my money...

    Jayne, how did the sunnies go down with DH?

    Kazz, sorry I missed your post earlier... We are all doing well thank you How are you? How's Declan? Sleeping through yet?

    Belle, how's that spotting? Maybe it is due to the low levels of progesterone in your system. My first AF after my m/c was ultra heavy and I think it was because of the same reason. Fingers crossed it stops soon or maybe you should go see a dr.

    As for me... My cervis has firmed up a bit and I have creamy CM... so I think I still have a bit to wait for O... urgh!! I was sure it was very close... Oh well I'll have to keeeep on waiting.

    I had a dream last night that oprah was pg, and she hosted 'the price is right'... LOL

    Tanya

  13. #31
    goldilocks Guest

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    Morning ladies!

    Lisa, I completely believe in psychics, etc. There was a thread about them recently in which I wrote about how I do my own tarot readings...they told me I'd fall pregnant in April and I conceived on 27 April So it wouldn't surprise me if the tea lady AND your friend are right! Ooooh, I'm sooooooooooo excited for you, honey! I just KNOW it's going to be your month!

    Kazz, thank you...it's good to know that I'm not the only one!

    Sarah, you made my eyes well up with tears too! That is unbelievably sweet how you remember Katelyn every day. I'm sure she is with you everywhere you go. Please don't think that you're any less deserving than the rest of us just because you already have a beautiful daughter. That's so untrue! You are just as deserving sweetie, and I want to see you get a BFP just as much as everyone here.

    Jayne, woo hoo @ the $140 sunnies! When I first met DH I told him I'd bought some jeans for $170...he thought I'd bought about five pairs for that much, but it was only one pair! LOL How are you feeling, hon? I hope the m/s fairy is being kind to you!

    Michelle71, ooooh I'll be keeping everything crossed for you when you test on Monday! I'm telling you, we're due for a mass exodus in here!! And btw, lack of symptoms doesn't mean anything - lots of women don't get any until 6 weeks+ How funny that your friend also dreamt that you were pg. I'm sure she's spot on, sweetie!

    Michelle, thank you so much...I'm always thinking of you too honey. I miss my Jan belly buddies! But I'm always stalking you all and checking your progress I bet you can't wait for your scan in a few weeks. I know you've been having a bit of rough time lately but please cheer up, everything will be just fine with your perfect little bean!

    Tanya, welcome back! PMSL @ a pg Oprah hosting the Price is Right! I hope you catch that eggie when you O soon!

    Same old, same old over here. Everytime I think the spotting has stopped, it starts up again. I'm thinking that maybe I should go and see a doctor about it. I haven't had any pains, cramps or unusual CM so I know I don't have an infection. I'm not bleeding very much but I tell you, I'm so sick of wearing panty liners every day! LOL Aaaaanyway, I might go and see a doc over the weekend. I don't have a regular GP which makes it difficult. Think I may need to find one!

    Have a fabulous weekend everyone!

    Love
    Belle
    -xxxooo-

  14. #32

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    Good morning girls!

    Lisa, thanks so much for your support, it really means alot. I SO believe in psychics etc too! (That's not to say that some of them aren't dodgy!) I really think everything is pointing in the right direction for you.........quietly for you! Although, you're so sweet, I'm not sure i want you to go just as I'm getting to know you!

    Sarah, your kind words mean so much to me. It feels good to admit that losing my baby WAS a life changing experience. Thank you so much for sharing your story. My eyes well up with tears every time I read that post. I think it's just beautiful that you hug and kiss your Katelyn every day. I'm sure she knows she is well loved and missed. I agree with Belle, you are no less deserving of a baby because you already have Lucy, I really hope I see your BFP here soon! BTW, your dad is freaky! Eating sandwiches at 2mths!!!! PMSL

    Belle, I really think you should go and see a Dr about your spotting. For your own peace of mind, if nothing else. I'm sure it must be sending you up the wall by now! They may not be able to help you, but then again, they just might! I really hope it's all sorted out for you really soon

    Tanya, PMSL at Oprah preggers hosting the price is right! Not to be mean, but surely she is just too mature to be pg now?!!!!

    Michelle, thinking of you over this LOOOOONG weekend. Looking forward to seeing your post on Monday!

    Keen, hope the tww is flying by! When are you testing?

    Jayne I hope you survived your confession! I'm sure the sunnies look absolutely fab!

    To everyone else, I hope you all have a great Friday!

    Love Sarah xoxo

  15. #33

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    Hey there gals,

    Tanya.. hello, well if that Sunday theory works, I think I O'd last Sunday so if I am pg then it could well and truly be a boy! Hope you O soon matey and catch that little eggy! And your dream about Oprah absolutely cracked me up! Hopefully its you that will be pg and NOT Oprah!!

    Jayne - PMSL at the horny little spermies, hopefully the eggy was feeling randy too and they had a nice little orgy and created me a little bean!! You sound so much better and much more confident with your pg now. Cant wait for you to have your 12w scan and see little bubba growing as strong as ever. How did dh take the news of your $140 glasses? I lie to dh all the time about that stuff, he figures it out in the end but im very naughty like that!

    Kazz, great to hear that the PAML thread is clearing out to make room for all of us. Thanks for you wishes for a bfp, im quietly hoping that this is the one.

    Sarah - oh you are such a wonder, and little Katelyn can feel your love and hear everything you say. She will always be close to you in lives you heart forever. I really hope that you can bring a new sibling for both your little girls soon. And your comment about not being able to breath until Lucy was in your arms, really touched me, I can only imagine how you felt and im glad you shared that with us. And isnt it fascinating that others can actually have prophetic dreams about us! My brother knew I was pg the first time before I even told him, when I did tell him, he said 'I know .. I dreamt of it'.

    Michelle - mmmm is that a coincidence or what? People dreaming of both you and I being pg, ohhh im praying my heart out that we can be belly buddies, oh heck I hope all of us can be belly buddies together Lets hope af symptoms stay away and she takes a hike for the next 9 or so months! Good luck for testing on Monday. Praying we can all start the week with a bfp from you!

    Belle - good idea to go and see a dr, it must be so annoying, and I would recommend that you find a regular gp - it really helps not having to explain your whole story all the time and have a care giver that really knows you. I hope it clears up soon as its annoying me know too!! I want you to be able to start ttc so you can get your bfp soon! Wow you do your own readings, thats amazing. Im not huge believer but I like to explore the unknown at times.

    Sez, thanks honey your sooo sweet. And dont worry if by some miracle I get that bfp this month, im taking you all with me. I wont go until your all ready to come along! But even though I have some promising signs, I still doubt i'll be announcing a bfp this month. And you are right, there are some dodgy psychics out there. My mum went to one not long ago and she told my mum that Id had a loss and that I would be pg again between the age of 28-29 and I would either have twinnies or have two close together. Hope she was right! Twinnies run in my family, how scary!!

    Keen - ive got everything crossed for you my sweet . Like Kazz and Jayne said, there are spare seats in PAML which are destined for some of us, I hope you and Michelle can be our first grads since Jayne boarded the ark. How are you going with the tww?

    A big hello to anyone I may have left out, will try and catch up over the weekend though.

    Well me - the sickly feeling has eased so maybe it was a virus, but I still have indigestion and heartburn, and tingly bbs that are very itchy today! Ive also had some cramping on and off in the past few days and have been really tired. Ive got another week till testing so i'll wait and see if af symptoms appear over the next few days. My BF is 6.5wks pg and she had some brown spotting yesterday on a few occasions, she hasnt had any since but I am worried out of my brain for her. She is fine and confident that its nothing, as she has been having pretty bad m/s, but she did experience a fair bit of pain last week in her left side. She has an ob appt on Monday, but I think she should see someone earlier. Am I just overworried because of what happened to me? I dont want to push her, but Im just worried for her. Praying that her little bubba is ok and sticks it out for the next 8 months

    Hope you all have a great day...omg what a long post - ooops sorry!

    Love and baby dust to you all.

  16. #34

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    Sorry me again - forgot to mention that I had creamy cm today (cream in colour too TMI I know ). Is that normal, it probably is, guess ive never really paid attention to cm after O day.

    PS Moglie - how are you doing hun?

  17. #35

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    Twinnies Lisa! Wouldn't that be exciting, I really hope you do, and (according to your mum's psychic) it's the right time......

    I said to my dh recently that it would be nice to have twinnies, I was thinking up names and all. He just said 'let's concentrate on having one first'! I guess that's fair enough, but a girl can dream can't she?

  18. #36

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    Lisa, the boy predition is only for this Sunday, and she goes by the days you BD. If you get pg and want more info just pm me and I'll give you details of how to contact her .

    Sez... LOL at DH telling you to concentrate on have one baby first!!

    TL
    Tanya

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