Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ March 2009

[coco1411]

Hey there everyone sorry for being MIA!

I am 12dpo today and no af and no bfp so Im ambiguous as to what to expect at the moment.

How long was your first cycle after your m/c? This was my first pregnancy that didn't to go plan and not Im unsure (as everyone else probably was the first time) as to what will be happening. I don't know about the feelings Im having like ovulation pains or something going on but it isnt like the begining of AF. I dont want to be overanalysing every little thing and I can't belive Im back to this point after trying for 12-18 months and finally seeing the little second line and a little heartbeat

My temps are still high and they've spiked again today so im hanging out to see it drop or see a bfp argrgrhhrhhh!!!

How is everyone else feeling about their cycle? Mummy_of_3 have you tested??? So exciting!!

My Luetal phase is normally 12 days according to my past tests so Im waiing with baited breath..as Ive said like 4 times this post..Ok im going now. Having a little meltdown here..

[Tuesday's Child]

cherised1 - Glad you are feeling so positive and determined to look after yourself. Goodluck with the weightloss.

sally - Goodluck with the acupuncture today. Let us know how it goes.

erybery - I'm so sorry hun . I really don't know what to say. My heart is breaking for you that you have to go through this. Its just so cruel after everything you have already been through. But I am still for a good outcome. Slim is not impossible.

possums - Good to see you're back but I'm sorry you are feeling down .

babymiracles - Since you are taking a break from BB, I will offer my congratulations on your wedding now. I hope you have beautiful day . I'm glad things are going smoothly and that they continue to do so .

MO3B - I'm hoping AF is not on her way - she should realise by now that she is not welcome. 8 days late though! Have you POAS yet?

AFM - I saw my doctor and have gotten a script for Zoloft. After posting last night, my mood took a downhill turn and I feel absolutely wretched today. I'm not happy about the decision to start meds - I feel like I'm admitting defeat. But I'm so tired of fighting.

[Tuesday's Child]

Eliza - We must have posted at the same time. AF took 5 weeks to return after I had a D&C. Hang in there though. It may still be too early to test.

[coco1411]

Question...Would it be unreasonable to ask for a blood test at 12dpo?

has anyone ever done that first cycle after m/c to take the ambiguity away? Im thinking of doing that..

[coco1411]

Hannah: I didnt have a d&c I had a "labour" from the tablets that they give to full term women to induce labour. No surgery or anything so when I had a scan a week later and they said it all looked healthy.

Just having a cry to mum on the phone, the days between crap days are getting longer and longer so when I have a bad day it really hits me.

[meh]

Hello everyone,

I too have been MIA. I'll try to catch up, but it'll take me longer than this post. My apologies for my omissions....

Hannah - choosing to take medication is not admitting defeat, but being proactive in finding the solution that fits best. Please don't be discouraged. I hope that you start to feel more in control very soon. Thinking of you.

erybery - my heart goes out to you. I work in early intervention with children with developmental delays and disabilities. Sometimes we see children at work with terribly long lists of 'congential malformations' that were detected before birth and despite these heavy labels, the children themselves do magnificently. I'm hoping with all my might that your small person might be an exception to what your specialists seem to be saying at this stage.

babymiracles - I hope I haven't missed you. Good luck for your special day. I completely understand the need to look inwards leading up to a wedding, particularly as you nurture your growing small person as well. Take care.

coco1411 - I've learnt the hard way how much bad days can leap out unexpectedly. I'm glad you have your mum to cry on the phone with. Hang in there, it really does get easier. To answer your other questions, our m/c was a natural one. I bled for 7 days, and counting from the day of the first day without bleeding, I went straight back to a 24-25 day cycle. I hope this helps to clarify where you can sometimes count from. I guess I was just lucky (???!!) that my body was able to clean itself and settle back into a routine again so soon afterwards.

karen van - I'm so hoping the cooperation between body and spirit kicks in better this month! Thank you for popping in to give us a pep-talk.

AFM - I've kept a low profile since AF arrived (on time) last week. I spoke with a friend on the weekend who used to be an infertility nurse and is a midwife. We're going to try to go with her advice to "go to bed to have fun, not to make babies". I'm not sure if I'm even going to do OPKs this month. Maybe we might just wing it? Last month was a bit stressful with our small boy being sick, and TTC, so maybe the low key approach might work for us?? I feel like I need to try some different approaches so I don't go nutty counting days and second guessing the 'best' time to BD. I'm into my wheat-free, dairy-free diet, and noticing a difference all over and in my head-space too. Maybe the synergy of spirit and body is coming closer??

Hope I don't sound too loopy! I might not post very often, but putting my thoughts together to 'talk' to you all is quite cathartic. Thank you for listening.

Take care,
M

[nicjay]

Just a quick post from me today......

erybery - I wish I knew what else I could say but will still hope that somehow everything turns out OK.

babymiracles - I hope you change your mind about the break, but if you don't then all the best for your wedding day! I hope you have a lovely day and stay positive above all, you are doing so well!

Big to everyone else especially those who are having a rough time

[Mandy1318]

Hay.
I'm new here and am wanting to speak to ppl in the same situation as I am. I don't know anyone else that has so I've got no one to talk to that understands.
DP and I have been TTC for 9months, been together for 2yrs and suffered 1 m/c together.
I've had 2 m/c at 6wks and 1 m/c at 8wks...2 of which were missed m/c and required d & c.
Every month I'll think I feel something and get excited only to have AF come along which seems to get more dissappointing each time.
Had numerous tests done and have seen a specialist only to be told that everything is fine and I need to suffer another m/c before they will investigate more.

Mandy 20 and DP 19

[Mandy1318]

Hi
I posted a reply on this thread a while ago now but it doesn't seem to be showing up.
Help plz.

[Mandy1318]

>TTC after recurrent M/C
>Hi. I?m hoping to chat to people who are or have been in the same situation as me. I don?t know anyone that has had trouble conceiving or that have suffered m/c so I have no one to talk to about it so I?m so glad I found this site.
Feeling more hopeful since reading other posts on here. A lot of strong and courageous people on here.
>TTC for 9months
2m/c at 6wks and 1m/c at 8wks, 2 of which were missed m/c requiring d&c
DP and I have been together for 2yrs.
Had numerous tests done by GP and all came back normal now specialists says I need to suffer a 4th m/c before he will investigate further.
Every month I?ll think I feel something and will get all excited only for AF to arrive arghhh so frustrating.
>Thanks

[Mel1979]

erybery - I'm so sorry hun What Hannah said is right though, slim is not impossible. Thinking of you.

coco - I had a natural m/c and my cycles pretty much went back to normal except for the last few months, I seem to have a really long cycle then a normal one! I know it is easier said than done but try not to drive yourself too crazy (although I do it to myself every month ). Hope you get your BFP.

Hannah - Choosing to take the meds takes courage and is in no way admitting defeat. Maybe by taking them it may lift your spirits and the positive energy might just help you get your BFP. Look after yourself hun

meh - Sounds like a good approach. We tried but I am not very good at not obsessing unfortunately

MO3B - I know how you feel - I am 5 days late today. I hope you get an answer soon - preferably a BFP!

babymiracles - Well I will wish you a big now! And will throw in some for good measure!

Possums - Oh, sweetie. I can't imagine what you are going through . I am glad you have found the strength to keep trying. I hope you get your forever baby soon.

Sally - How did the acupuncture go?

AFM - Well 5 days late and still no AF. Called my FS today to get a blood test done as I wanted (and needed) to know before we went to Melbourne. It was negative so this month isn't our month It was always a long shot the first month after the op. Well, I intend to go to Melbourne and shop up a storm. Going to let my hair down and do out dancing and have a few drinks too! I am not a big drinker at all but I think DH and I deserve to spoil ourselves and relax and not worry about things. I'M kind of sick of being careful about everything I do or eat or drink, it doesn't seem to be helping.

Big HELLO to everyone else. Sorry for lack of names, need to go and pack and start dinner. Will try to pop in later.

[Cherished]

Hi everyone and a big hello to coco1411, another of my lovely October belly buddies I am so happy to find you here (in a weird terrible kind of way...but I am sure you know what I mean)...

I think it is totally ok to ask for a blood test at any time especially if you have a good relationship with your dr and they wont mind reffering you... In my december cycle I was about 13 days late for my period (which never happened) and I got a blood test after being 10 days late... I felt like a bit of a looney when it came back negative because I really thought I must be pregnant... Than after that disappointment I did get pregnant in the Jan cycle and as you know was over the moon about it.... Only to be VERY disappointed again 2 days ago BUT I am totally excited about TTC again and having a healthy baby as as possible er do it's natural thing or to have the curette I am booked in for on Friday

erybery I am so so sorry for you honey, hang in there we all love you xoxo

Mel1979 I will be right there with you next month and here's hoping for a positive result for us all!

meh you don't sound loopy at all! Not sure what methods you girls have chatted about in the past but I know accupuncture balanced my hormones really well and prepared me for concieving, I am planing to go back a week or so after my op on Friday...

HannahD I really feel for your depression... although you don't know me from a bar of soap and my opinion may not be welcome but there is no defeat in getting help for 'any' problem in life and the medication does not haveto be a permanent part of your life either... But for now it could be just the thing you need

mummy_of_3_boys I thought the PMS monster was rearing it's ugly head before I got my positive pg test, so there is still hope!!!

Possums Love and good vibes to you honey... Keep trying and loving eachother along the way xo

Hope everyone else is going great

AFM I'm feeling like I'm coming down with the flu and feel sick again... I am sure come Sunday I will feel much better... I've got 5 days off work now so I will have fully recovered by the time I go back to work.

[Greenslw]

"blah"

I went to the Clinic yesterday and got BT again (I have horid veins and I'm over being pin *****ed) my HCG is still 10 not <2 which is silly but it means another test next week and another week of waiting till next FET. I'm over waiting, I know I shouldn't be so impatent but I am. This is me usually and I don't think TTC is doing me any favours. My very kind but clearly miss guided nurse said "oh if you don't have anything else on in another month give us a call and well have a plan" Anything else? What do you think my focus has been for the past 2 years?

Are all IVF clinics this dumb? or is it cos it's a public hospital? I'm really thinking of going to a private clinic. Any thoughts would be welcome.

Think steam out of ears ladies, I need to calm down.

I also spat it at work today. My college deserved a chat but not a snap. Need a holiday.

[charm]

We bought a new bed too!!!!!! LOL.... My DH just didn't get it why we needed one but I told him ours is over 150yrs old ( its and old anitques cast/ brass bed) and we need a new bed with no one elses vibes on it.

Yes the AF dance sounds like a great idea.. PLEASE EVERYONE SEND CHARM AND I SOME BIG FAT AF VIBES!!!!!
I told my mother today about the TTC thing again she laughed so hard..No less than two days ago I told her no mre wait.. he still smokes etc... and how i got the script...she just laughed and said i was hurt and emotinal and its amazing how an ultimatum can work sometimes to bring you back into reality...I am still really scared but I am not going to let it dampen my TTC thoughts or efforts...Doc seems to think things should be OK this time!.

Thanks mrzbaby you just gave me the first smile for the day gee and it's 8.00 pm sad huh but thanks and we will do that dance together and get our af.

Erybery- I am so sorry I hope and pray all works out well for you life can be so unfair.


:
I hope every body else is doing okay.As for the af after D&C today it has been 4 weeks still no af 2 weeks ago my ovaries were very sore so I am hoping they are not so far away goodnight everyone take care...

[sallyk61]

Good evening ladies.

erybery- Nothing really helps now. Thinking of you.

HannahD- its actually harder to go down this path, its a lot more confronting and you are doing it so you should be proud of how strong you are, even though it doesn't feel like it now...

Mel - Went well. Had a slightly crap day so I think the next time I will feel a bit more positive!!

My wonderful, caring mother is sending me nuts. I She keeps speaking to everybody she knows in the medical field about when I should start trying, as she obviously isn't happy with us trying start of the next cycle.
Her reason is that I was past 12weeks when I was terminated.
I wish I could just get a straight answer, I dont want to take any risks but if we wait its atleast 2 months of waiting that is IF my cycle starts in the next 2 weeks.

[RhiChiChi]

Hey all,

Only a quick visit to say hello to all and will be back for persies tomorrow. Had a bit on today and have only managed to have some down time now.

Take care, am thinking of you all

xx

[Tuesday's Child]

meh - Glad that the new diet is making a difference. Good on you for sticking to it! I hope a more relaxed approach works for you - it certainly can't hurt.

Mel - Sorry about the BT results . I hope you have a great time in Melbourne. You so deserve to let your hair down.

cherished1 - Thanks for the encouragement. I hope you feel better soon. Good on you for taking some time off. Goodluck for the op on Friday

greenslw - What a stupid thing for that nurse to have said! Vent away - its better to let it all out.

sally - I'm sorry you're mum is being frustrating at the moment. As good as a mum's intentions are, sometimes they just need to be told to butt out (nicely of course!). Deciding when to TTC again is a very personal decision.

AFM - Thanks to everyone for your support. I was just so determined to do this on my own. I thought the therapy would be enough. But when I feel low, its very difficult to challenge the thought patterns I've had all my life. Maybe the meds will allow my mood to lift enough so that I can then work on changing the way I think.

I do have a question for those who chart though. I've had 5 days of watery/EWCM (sorry if TMI) so DH and I have BDing like there's no tomorrow. Today my cervix still feels high and soft and my temps are still low, but my CM has been creamy. I've also had a few O pains today. So I'm guessing ovulation has happened or will happen very soon? Thoughts? Unfortunately, when my mood takes a dive, so does my sex drive. How on earth does one feel like a wanton sex goddess on a Tuesday night? .

[fificlaire]

Hi Ladies,

Thought i would pop in and say hi.

Havnet done a persies post in a while, i just find it so hard to keep up. I do check in every day tho to see how you are all getting on and for for you all.

I feel that i shouldnt be posting in here anymore now that i have my bub on the way, i fell that you may think that i'm rubbing it in. I feel guilty for posting. I for you all to get that special bub that you deserve and we can close this part of belly belly down and everyone move over to PAML.

Love you all ladies especially my Friday girls! Fridays arent the same if we dont catch up!
Jen, MO3B, Mollycat, Krystie; PLC and not forgetten Angel - my special girls! (notice your names are in your typing colour on fridays )

Well i think thats enough from me today.

Hope everyone is ok and a massive from me xxxxx