Sorry I haven't been in much girls. I find keeping up with this beloved thread a little stressful atm as i can't keep up very well and feel like my personals and responses are not well thought through. The perfectionist in me is struggling with that and my need to be sincere. So apologies for not being in here to keep up to date as i did before. I will do what I can. I don't like to forget anyone and invariably do often...argh!

TUP- So sorry hun and welcome to our little thread. I wish I could help you but my circumstances were different. I am sure there will be someone in here that can shed some light for you. The ladies here are lovely and been through some tragic experiences. I hope you find the support you need in here and some much needed answers.

Dory- I had nose bleeds too hun...only in pregnancy. It was pretty full on and a bit of a shock but normal i thought. I had about 3 and quite heavy but would stop on their own. But yeah, feels a bit weird and clogged up afterwards. I didn't like that feeling and would try to blow it out. Nice!
How lovely for you to have the week you have had, having the family around and the cats being social. I nice break and uplift for you. Now...back to resting love! It was great to hear what you have been up to and great to know you are doing ok. xoxo

Charlie B- Welcome back sweet and hope the holiday did you some good. Good luck this week for the Ob appointment. It will most definitely be hard but you will handle it well, how ever you do. I hope you find the answers you need to. xx

SusieQ- Congrats on AF turning up. Blah...that it is heavier. Mine was lighter....go figure. I am not sure if you can ever have an expectation sometimes, we are all that bit different hey. Goodluck for the plans ahead TTCing and all. xox

Teni Bear- Good luck sweety for this week. I am sure is will be devastating all over again but I know you will handle it the best you can. Will be thinking of you and sending you and Charlie B strength. xoxo

Crumpet- Good Luck and thinking of you TTCing.

Cmegles- Hope you are enjoying your little getaway...to us in Aus it sounds so fancy and exotic but to you I am sure it is like going to beach for the week. We are impressed and I am sure it is just what you need right now. Good luck hunxoxo

Angelicdragon- Hope you got to do what you planned eventually for Annabelles 8th. You have done this for so long, missed and loved your angel child. It is of comfort to know and see this, your actions and love 8 years down the track. Right now, as I reach DD's 1st year, I can not fathom what that must be like. You are a strong woman. xox (nice to meet you)

Aries- Hope you are doing ok hun.

Chez- Hope you are doing ok too. Thinking of you. xox. Been thinking of Ryan a bit lately and hoping DD and he have found each other to play. xoxo

So sorry to have missed anyone and my heart and thoughts go with you.

AFM- Just trying to take a couple of days to myself here. A little stressed and trying to get through with my anxiety playing havoc a bit. I am doing ok just a bit too much right now. A week tomorrow until DD's anniversary of her birth and official death. A week until my SIL give birth. Been up to the hospital to see a friend and her baby. My other SILs baby shower just gone on sunday. I am having to deal with a lot right now and it is constantly on my mind. I am going through a stage where i want to step out for a bit. I want a break, pause button on life etc. I tis too much.
I have also invited the pregnancy photography into my life and it has become a focus of mine. It allows me to get close but removed. Looking at them through the lens of a camera allows me to see it as art, light, shadow, composition. Editing...is another thing entirely and I have to do that in bursts. Arghhh, it is so so hard but I am driven by the fact that i never got to have this and I would hate someone else to be in my shoes and have that regret. I didn't take any nice shots before DD was born. I planned to and then she died and I felt wrong about it. I wish someone would have encouraged me more to do it and be ok with it. I wish I had those shots instead of a handleful of everyday photos, crying, putting make up on...a new outfit. So i am trying to give that to my friends and SILs. I love photos but no everyone does. It is one of those things. They can not develop any if they don't want. But they are there if they want. I have found that they have discovered their beauty all over again in pregnancy. It has lifted their confidence and allowed them to embrace the miracle that little bit more. It is amazing what it does for our confidence to see just one good shot of ourselves....even if it takes a 100 to get it.

Dory, I know you are a Brivegas girl. If you ever want me to take photos of you, please say hun. I would love to do that for you...if that is something you want. I will leave it with you. It is not for everyone.
Anyway, better be off and have a shower....i know 11am and still stinky!
Love to all and thanks for listening.