Thanks Trish for your kind and encouraging words. I just find that talking with you beautiful ladies helps me so much. You are the only ones that understand me, know my pain, and feel my heartache.
Today Cooper is 2 months old. I am trying to be strong and keep myself busy today. I am going to buy a frame for his birth certificate and put it on the wall for all to see because I am proud of him and want his birth to be recognised. I don't want people to forget.
I just can't believe it has been 2 months. It feels like 2 days, although like you all said early on, you learn to live with the pain. I think I am slowly learning. It still hurts so much but I am trying to manage it.
I hope that my angel is watching over me and gives me the strength to accept the results I get tomorrow................ forever in my heart and dreams, I love you Cooper.
Dear Lynn: Every day is hard I know but it is particularly hard on days like these. I know how 2 months feels like a lifetime ago and a heartbeat ago at the same time. You should be proud of Cooper's birth certficate because you gave him the gift of birth like any other mother. I hope today is a calm day for you and that as the sun rises tomorrow, no matter what the results are, you can look up at the morning sun feel the love that Cooper has for you and his Dad. :hugs: to you sweetie.
Dream: Wow what an eventful holiday! I am impressed but the snake wrangling!!! Good luck with TTC this month, I hope the acupuncture does the trick.
Baby Amore: your support group sounds wonderful. I guess all that anyone wants is to tell their story in a safe and supportive environment around people who understand every word they speak. Thanks for the kind words about being UTD. I am not really up to announcing it formally yet, want to wait for my first scan in 16 sleeps.
Well we had the most wonderful time on the Harbour last night. I was such a fantastic introduction to Sydney. I managed to avoid the continual offers of Bubbly, Red and soft cheeses by saying that I have high Blood Pressure at the moment and the Doctor has told me no alcohol or salty food. Well it is partly true so it wasn't a lie. We didn't end up getting back to the marina until 9.30pm and by the time we got home I felt more relaxed then I have in a very long time. I am a bit bummed today though, DH just left and although we are used to being apart, this is the first time since losing Harrison so I don't know how I'll be. Anyway I am keeping myself busy today, I am doing some washing, going to the gym, do the grocery shopping and then it will be time for a nanna nap.
I hope everyone, especially you Lynn are having an ok day.
Huge :hugs: to everyone
Love Spring.
PS, If anyone is interested in the Sydney Catch Up I have started a separate thread.
PPS, Has anyone heard from Flowerchild? I am starting to get worried, wasn't she due back ages ago?
Lynn - I am thinking of you today and I hope you get through it ok, Cooper will be watching over his Mummy and Daddy through today and always. My heart goes out to you today Lynn
Dream - Sounds like a wonderful holiday, now that you are home you will need a rest from all the drama!
Bec - Oh and I would be interested in a catch up between Melb gals - I'm half way between Geelong & City.
Trish - Your support group sounds wonderful, I wonder if they have one in Melbourne so I might need to look into it. Really think I need it at the moment :frown: I have seen a psychologist twice but last time (thurs) I really noticed that she watches the clock towards the end and I sort of feel hurried up, and as soon as the 45 mins is up she sort of makes moves to get out of her chair which basically says "get out"!
Spring - Your day yesterday sounds wonderful, glad you felt relaxed. Thinking of you while DH is away
Me - I won't go into it today!
I hope everyone is well.
Mel
P.S. I have been thinking about Deb lately too and wondering if she is ok, from memory I thought she was going to be back mid Jan. I hope she is alright!
Last edited by Mel1977; January 28th, 2007 at 11:18 AM.
Thanks Baby-Amore for letting me know about Flowerchild. If you are in contact with her, can you let her know that we miss her and her insightful and caring posts. When she is ready, I can't wait to hear from her again and I hope all is OK with her and her wonderful family.
Mel: That is a short post and you have me worried, I hope you are OK. I had planned to give you a call at about 5.00pm, Is that OK? If I don't hear otherwise I will call and if you don't want to talk I totally understand. It must be a horrible feeling to be worried about the time when you see you psych. You should raise it with her as it is not a good thing and she may not be that aware of how obvious she is. She is meant to be a professional and instead of giving you hints that time is about to be up she should be upfront with you and let you know. Just let her know hun, or if you are not happy, try to get a referral to someone else. I am so happy that you are organising a Melbourne group. Oh and I am putting your B'day pressy in the mail tomorrow so I hope it gets there by Wednesday. I might send it express just to be sure so keep your eye out for it.
Well so much for my grand plans of going to the gym and shopping. I lay down on the couch for a moment and woke up three hours later and only because DH rang to say he had arrived in Canberra. I must have needed it.
I am having a major case of pre-Mondayitis but I am looking forward to a night perched in front of the telly and then early to bed.
I hope Deb is ok, Trish I second what Spring said if you speak to her tell her we are all thinking of her
I am ok, I don't know why but lately I just seem to have more bad days than good. Admittely most of the people around me wouldn't have a clue cause I act like everything is fine, I see that it makes people feel uncomfortable when I have bad days and so sometimes its easier to just pretend. Everything I see or hear or think makes me teary. I have no idea what is wrong with me, I read a message my sister wrote in Nicholas' guest book yesterday afternoon and went off to have a shower so I could ball my eyes out without anyone knowing. Then last night had a great time (with a couple of drinks included), until my nephew bent down to his 3 month old sister and sang that "I love you" song from Barney (my sister bought Nicholas a Barney toy that sung that song and he was cremated with it, she said so he could always have that song to listen to... for those of you who dont know it goes - I love you, you love me, we're a happy family, with a great big hug and a kiss from me to you, won't you say you love me too) and I had to try so hard to hold back the tears. And then today when I woke up DH was already in the shower, so I balled my eyes out laying in bed and I can't even tell you why! And just the last few days in general have been crappy, Friday was ok but how odd is that considering it is the day I expected to be bad, I think I am in need of a straight jacket!
Spring - Will definitely talk to you when you call, wanna know all about how you are feeling with that little bubba growing inside And you shouldn't have bought a bday pressie, you guys have enough on your plate at the moment, but thank you all the same and its always exciting knowing something is coming
Lynn - Again, still thinking of you and hoping your day is going as well as possible :hugs:
Trish is right, Deb is back but is taking a little personal time out to sort through some issues she has atm. But I'm sure she'll be back as soon as she feels ready.
Anyway time to lock this thread & start a new one over here
Registered User
Oh and I would be interested in a catch up between Melb gals - I'm half way between Geelong & City.
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