blurgh - moving sucks! glad it's not me this time around!
are there any of our little crew that haven't had to move (or not contemplating moving) since our kidlets arrived???
just want to apologise to everyone for not being particularly active and chatty in here. i have been struggling with stuff IRL, and, if i'm honest, the number of preg announcements and new bubbas in here, as wonderful as it is, is also feeling a bit like a kick in the guts for me from an emotional perspective. we are over the moon to have E, and know how truly blessed we are - and we are also content (ish) with her being an only baby as ivf isn't on the cards again - but I'm still struggling with the emotional side of things when i'm confronted with pregnancies and new babies. it's nothing against anyone - i LOVE that you are all having babies again - just feeling a bit "woe is me" about it not being us. i think it really doesn't help that things have been so emotionally charged with the type of calls i'm taking at work so far this year, and losing so many people in my life that i care about - feeling a bit too drained to be able to come in here and be supportive and stuff. Hope no-one thinks this is anything against any of you because it's not - just going into the same old self-preservation techniques i used while TTC E - if things are too much emotionally, avoid it all! not healthy, but MEH!
anyway - been having a good-ish few days emotionally this week. the damage i have done to my back hasn't healed properly, so have been seeing the chiro more this week - the bonus to this is the fact i've been seeing him for a long time, and he has picked up a mood change, and pushed me to confront what i have been feeling. he's also given C the nudge to help me with dealing with it and working out where we stand. we have both admitted that one child is enough - any more would be a bonus - and we're both secretly hoping for that bonus. he is struggling as well, so at least he is understanding where i'm at...
on the subject of my back - it's pretty much screwed up - i've strained the major muscles in my upper back and shoulders, and haven't given it a chance to heal properly, so i'm now on a "no heavy lifting for two weeks" ban - E will, most times, climb up into my lap, so the only lifting i'm doing is when she is upset and just can't do it herself. hopefully soon it will be all ok - hate feeling like i'm useless!
now on to the fun stuff - the poppet! All i can say is WOW - how much are these kidlets developing at the moment? Every day is something new. I fall in love with her all over again every single day. A new word, a new action, understanding something new - everything makes me so damn happy and proud to be her Mummy! She is amazing in every way. I am so damn impressed with the way she is growing up! She is such a lovely little personality (even when she tantrums lol - she gives us a hug afterwards to apologise) - she engages people with her personality all the time. She is a little girl we're happy to take out in public because she almost always behaves so well (very rarely she will be over tired and have "issues" lol). She is starting to get more shy around strangers, but when she realises that mummy and daddy are talking to them and it's ok, she comes out of her shell again. i'm not too worried about it - i figured healthy caution isn't a bad thing around strangers lol
we have started doing some basic work on toilet training her, but we're not going to push it. It will happen when the time is right! I've very much adopted the "it will happen when it happens" attitude to parenting. i believe E could be further developed with some of her skills if DH and I swapped roles again (i'm more academic, so reading, drawing etc) but she is doing things i wouldn't do with her (she knows how to do things in the garden that i'm clueless about - quite embarrassing really). We just need to find a balance and to encourage Daddy to do the drawing/crafty type stuff more with her - which will happen when the weather changes again. I don't mind them making the most of the outside time while they can
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