Mmmmm, I think it was about 3 months after the birth. I had no desire to do it before that and DD was pretty much "surgically attached" to me for the first 3 months, so we didn't really get a chance.
I had torn a little bit at the birth, needed 3 stitches. It was a labial tear. But it seems to have healed up perfectly.
I don't remember sex being painful. A little tender, maybe. But it didn't hurt as such. But DH was being a little more careful than usual. Yes, it was true for me that things were a little dry pretty much until my period returned 9 months after DD was born. I do remember being surprised that things felt quite tight down there. I guess I kinda expected it to be all stretched and loose. Even DH commented that they must have stitched me up good (stupid old joke about puting an extra stitch in...grrr).

Anyway, don't worry, it will get better. But it might take a little while. Maybe try some lube? If however it doesn't get better over time, go and see your gynaecologist. Maybe there is another reason behind it.
I hope your partner is understanding and patient.
Sasa