i am so sorry for your loss, and the horrible insensitivities of your doctor. you are not to blame. please allow yourself to grieve, and find yourself a supportive doctor who can help you through your pregnancy needs. as to your friends, might i suggest that you talk to them -- at least the ones you care about -- and let them know what will help you the most and how you feel. i ended up sending an email to all of my family and friends to let them know exactly how i was feeling and what they could do to help. it worked quite well for many, and the ones i lost, well, i think that was for the best. it can be difficult for folks to know what to do--for example, i couldn't be around babies and still have trouble with newborns--so let them know how to treat you. good luck, and big hugs. m