Doza, as the other ladies have said there is no right or wrong answer, just go with the day that holds more significance. I think you'll know in your heart the answer. We had the same dilemma, however we were unaware when Phoebe passed away, we found out on the 14th of Feb that she had passed but gave birth to her on the 17th, which is the date she came into our world and the date we put on her gravestone. I also just wanted to say that I hope last Tuesday night helped you, even if it was just a little.