Oh nessa, kids and what they come out with!! and of course i am sure when asked she says "no i did nothing wrong!!" even when she did, and thats if the people she is telling bother to ask!!!!

This is a hard situation in this day and age, if this was said 20-30 years ago, i reckon most people response would be, "probably served you right kid" but these days with wrongful abuse so talked about it would be a "warning sign to look for" even though in this case its obviously not...

I had a similar (kind of not really) situation when i was a kid, i was about 5 or 6 and i had an accident at the rollerskating rink, i had a full on collision with another kid and ended up with two black eyes, well later that week i went to the bank or something with my dad and apperently a lady asked me if my daddy hurt me and i said "yes, he smacks me when i am naughty" or something like that, and the lady freaked coz she meant my horrible black eyes, whuch my father did NOT do, but i was just being honest, yes daddy does smack me when i am naughty!!! LOL Dad had to do a bit of explaining, but after a few minutes it was all sorted out and he was very embarrased and i dont think he took me out in public again until my black eyes went down!!!

So i dont really know what to suggest, does she understand why she gets smacked? like does DH tell her what she did wrong, and that this is the consequence etc, maybe this is time to encourage her to start telling the "whole truth" say its ok to tell people you got a smack, but you must also tell them what you did to desreve it or something along those lines. It may also help her to not be soo naughty if she has to tell people what she did to get the smack!!

Good luck!!!