Funny things you said in labour

[~Gee_Whizzy~]

I remember saying "I cant do this and i want to go home" and my doula said to me, remember what the books said, you're going through transition and i said to her, Dont you DARE lie to me, i have only been labouring for 5 hrs so there is NO WAY i am going through transition yet- i then promptly continued to spew in the bag they'd given me

I also remember at this time that the middie said, well i think its time to move to the birthing suite (i had laboured in my hossy room) and i said What for?? - She said well you want to have your baby dont you? and i replied, well i am not walking to the birthing suite and the middie said, no hun you won't have to walk, ill get you a wheel chair - i laughed at her and said you WILL NOT be able to find a wheelchair in a maternity ward cause they are only for people who have broken their legs WTF??! - Anyway, by the time my OB arrived to watch me birth DD the profanity had set in and when DD was crowning - i actually sang "Mother ***ker this hurts" to the tune of happy birthday?! - My OB said he wished he'd brought his dictaphone to record it, he had never heard anything so funny - My DH said he could not believe it when he heard the lyrics coming out, he thought i'd lost the plot