Thats Ok Caro,

Dh wouldn't want the kids there, he agrees that it would be traumatic. I agree on some levels but I think it depends on the child. Evan probably would have been fine at Isla's birth because it was so quick. But not sure about Glenns. But He was also traumatised by not being able to be with me, he lost all trust in goin gto my mum. It took ages before he was ok about her coming around. After Glenn, as soon as she was mentioned he would say he didn't want her to stay.
He loves her now though, Grandma has a pool! LOL.