Renee, I didn't want DS to be in the birthing room, but things didn't go to plan. I had my MIL coming to stay from 37 weeks - unfortunately Tom decided to arrive at 36w. I have a history of quick labours so didn't have time to take Jack anywhere first. As it turned out we did the right thing taking him - the labour was 3 hours and the ob said thank goodness we hadn't taken the time to drop him off or wait for someone to come to the house. He wasn't there for the birth, as soon as I got the hospital and discovered the birth was imminent, we rang a friend to come and pick Jack up (she has a car seat). But let me tell you, a 3 hour labour is intense and Jack saw me in a lot of pain before he left. He wasn't phased at all. We just were calm with him and told him the baby in mummy's tummy was coming (he was 19months but understood). Once Tom was born DH went to pick Jack up and bring him back to meet his brother. Jack was really excited to meet Tom and showed no signs of trauma at all. In fact, I would say seeing mummy in the room before the baby came, and then again after, actually helped him to process it all.

Things don't always go to plan, often it's how you deal with it when it happens that makes the difference.