Thank you all for your support, your replies brought me to tears as it is the first time my feelings have been validated by persons who would truly understand my experience. There is so much more to this story that makes it even worse but to know that my decision is supported based on the summarised version gives me some comfort. Unfortunately my husband hasn't been very supportive and has only grudgingly agreed to change the name after I have stated that I simply am not coping and cannot sign the form - somehow I think this will come back to haunt me however I feel it is what I have to do. After all, nobody considered my feelings. Thanks again!