i have a 4 1/2 yr old who frequently has meltdowns as well... so i feel your pain

If you have to walk well i would just warn him 10 min before you go (with a jumper or 2 in one hand ready for him outside) and tell him if your not ready bad luck your going to school and thats it ... (so i reckon pant and shoes on first on wakening ) ...and at the exact moment be prepared for a 'controlled meltdown' and say right mr xxx we are off to school and we are going now shove him out with the other kids and lock the door and head to school. ( i did exactly this but i did have a car and ignored him which was very hard but he put his seatbelt on in record time when he new i wasnt and the engine was on) .

Just today i had a 20 meltdown thats shorter than normal over i dont know what so i do hear the pain and frustration hugs honey x