Hi, ha ha, there's much mirth in my Mum's group about Robin Barker's suggestion in her book Baby Love that teething pains are a bit of a myth.

We are having similar night-waking problems with DD, 8 months. it's very hard when you're at the end of your tether. this is what SEEMS to be working for me, or at least, it's the path that I have started to follow and will keep following. but it aint for everyone.

I don't want to do controlled crying.

However, I am trying to encourage her to sleep longer than 2 hours at a time overnight. If i cd get it to 4 hours i'd be happy.

So her cot is in my room (sorry DH! But between his snoring and her waking, I'd get no sleep if I were with the both of them) ) I stay with her and pat either her bottom (if she lets me) or the cot mattress beside her, to let her know that I am there, though I'm not giving her the boob if I know she's had a feed (sometimes she'll wake up half an hour after the last feed).

I tried co-sleeping with her for a while. this was great in the first 3 months of her life, it felt right in my gut. But this time round, at 7-8 months, it just made her increase the frequency of feeds and made me even more sleep deprived. i know it works for many mums, but it's no longer right for me.

I am seeing a psychotherapist for PND. she suggested that by comforting her in other ways but not giving her the boob when she has recently been fed, but importantly, BEING there, it's widening her world. I'm not sure what that means except maybe that babies do have a surprisingly strong capacity for learning. It's hard when she'll cry for an hour or 40 minutes. I've gone back a few times after this and thought, no, this can't be right. But I know she doesn't need a feed every 2 hours EVERY night (if she's sick, that's different). and while i was prepared to do this in the newborn phase, I don't think it's a good idea for my sanity now.

I've also been advised that food is extremely important in sleep/waking, so we try to fill her tummy with a meal as soon as poss before bed, followed by a BF.

We rang my husband's aunt who is a pediatrician o/s, and she was full of all sorts of advice that just sounded wrong - make the last feed around 7pm a formula feed (no way! that's our special time!), and space feeds - whether BF, formula or solids - four hours apart. i thoguht this was lunacy, apart from jeopardising my milk supply.

anyway, the results of weaning her off boobie for that 1,30am feed that we want to cut out, have been dramatic at times and others, disappointing.

But I guess Rome wasn't built in a day, and we've only just started. last night she settled herself to sleep after a time playing in her cot, as we sat down to dinner. we were in shock because this is unprecedented. it made me think that maybe she's learning that going to sleep is something she can do for herself (we weren't deliberately leaving her alone to get that outcome - i was just hungry and knew she was reasonably happy playing on her own for a while).

but then tonight has been a nightmare prob because we had a huge day in town - lots and lots of stimulation. we'll see how it goes.

I am dying to read Elizabeth Pantley. I really enjoyed Pinky McKay when my bub was a newborn, but now I think her advice is a bit vague for older bubs ... their needs are quite different from a newborn's and I really wish her book would break down her recommendations by stages of infancy.

I have a question. When she's clearly tired and arching her back after I've put her down, she'll often jam herself right up against the short side of the cot. should I just let her settle where she settles, or should I move her into a more comfortable position?