Best of luck hun, hope everything works out for you the way you want it to. I would still recommend having a chat to a counsellor just to make sure your head is totally clear and to help you confirm within yourself you're making the right decision (and, personally, I think you are but I only know the basics of your situation so you are the only person who can say what is right for you) and to establish that contact so that if you need to talk about things afterwards, or something goes wrong (eg someone finds out about the whole thing) that you know you have somewhere to go to talk about things...

Best of luck with your decisions and moving on from here, feel free to stick around BB (you mentioned you and your husband were TTC, so maybe we can be there for your journey if you decide to go ahead with that once all's said and done with this situation!), we're happy to help you talk through things and give you the support you need during such a stressful time

Again, good luck, let us know how things go