I have a knack of finding really good threads just before heading off to bed

Just briefly and just speaking for myself:

I was a pretty self centered as a kid. I wasn't that good at thinking of anyones else's problems except my own. The few times I felt that a bit of compassion was deserving it seemed that everyone around me thought I was being silly. Especially my parents. Then around age 7 this discordance became more noticable. It all started with the lady that lived next door, Betty. It was 1977 and in our country town there was a very strong mainstream Anglo way of life. There wasn't much diversity... and all the women shaved their arm-pits... except the lady next door. Well that made her the brunt of all scorn and jokes As a child I could see how cruel this was. The shame I felt as my mother and her best friend (a woman that lived on the other side of Betty) gleefully cut out deodorant ads from the catalogues and hand posted them into Betty's letter box made me feel ill. From that point on I kinda became sensitized to my mother's meanness and lack of compassion... like you do if you have an allergy. After a while it seemed that the only thing my mother ever said about anybody was words of criticism and contempt. Eventually I started to stick up for people. It annoyed the hell out of her! It still does.

That's the nutshell version... I'll come back and add more later... it's nearly midnight... about to turn into a pumpkin! Great thread