David,
It seems the thing that drives all of us crazy is other people. All the stupid comments we have heard like “just relax, it’ll happen”, or “maybe you’re doing it wrong”, or “I know how you feel, it took us 3 months of trying”.
My problem at the moment is my DH wants to tell everyone who asks about our TTC story, but I am the complete opposite. I told a few people and their reactions left me feeling cold. This is something DH and I have discussed at length, but never seem to agree on. He sees it as merely a hiccup in the road that needs medical intervention. I see it as all the disappointment, frustration, jealously, etc. Although we are going through the whole thing together, our individual journeys are quite different. We both sometimes need to remember that we feel differently about TTC, and neither of us have it right or wrong.
Sites like Bellybelly, and books like yours are important to help those of us going through this feel we are not alone. I don’t think we’ll ever change the other people, but we can influence the way we feel about ourselves and our situation.
Jo
Hi David
BB certainly is lucky to have you in here - congrats on the success of your book.
My TTC story is a long one spanning almost 17 years - I am very determined My frustrations through the course of that journey are probably not all that different to anyone else's I suppose.
One thing I can say now is that this journey, whether I end up holding my own child or not, has changed me forever. I have a lot more patience for one thing . Having said that though, I tend to react more swiftly if I even suspect that someone may possibly only be contemplating even thinking that they might consider ripping me off. In any way. Leave me off an email joke list and I'll think I've been ripped off. Run out of mint slice bikkies at the supermarket and I'll think I've been ripped off. I get over it though, so no counselling required. I don't think.. I have been left with an overwhelming feeling that some being out there in the universe has ripped me off - good and proper! Through no fault of my own, I have been denied something that so many women achieve without really having to give a second thought to. And, good luck to them!
I could prattle on forever but I'd like to add that I am now entering into the known egg donation area. I am already in the known sperm donation world. At 44 years of age, I have had my share of ignorant comments, faces staring back at me as if I'm talking about taking part in a sci-fi flick and a now ex (thank goodness) manager who asked "Well why are you still trying after all these years?" when I asked for time off last year to cycle.
So, if you'd like to do a follow up book - the world of Donor Conception is one that needs a better public understanding. It also carries the same set of TTC frustrations and complications but with an added level of stress!! Hope that doesn't sound like I'm on a bandwagon - I'm not. Just trying to say that TTC stress can come in so many packages these days.
My story is here Donor Conception General Chatter #1
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My frustrations through the course of that journey are probably not all that different to anyone else's I suppose.
. Having said that though, I tend to react more swiftly if I even suspect that someone may possibly only be contemplating even thinking that they might consider ripping me off. In any way. Leave me off an email joke list and I'll think I've been ripped off. Run out of mint slice bikkies at the supermarket and I'll think I've been ripped off. I get over it though, so no counselling required. I don't think.. I have been left with an overwhelming feeling that some being out there in the universe has ripped me off - good and proper! Through no fault of my own, I have been denied something that so many women achieve without really having to give a second thought to. And, good luck to them!
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