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Thread: Are caesarean's that bad??

  1. #19
    Jodie259 Guest

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    Quote Originally Posted by caro View Post
    anyone would choose to have a C sect when instruments are likely to be used
    Heal time is a 6 week period like any other major Abdo surgery
    Bonding is at a risk compared to natural/vaginal
    Many many natural births use instruments (forceps & vaccuum) - and I've never heard of instruments being used during a c/s until this recent post. So by your comments... why would anyone choose to have a natural birth when instruments are likely to be used???

    Healing time could be 6 weeks - but as most mothers here have said - they heal quickly and without any complications.
    My friend had a natural birth that took her many more weeks to heal...

    The bonding risk is a complete lie. Sorry Caro, but I get upset when people say "you can't bond with your baby if you've had a c/s". People don't bond with their baby for their own emotional reasons - wether they have a c/s or natural birth. Many a natural birth mother has not bonded with their child - even for the reason of the excrutiating pain that they went through to bring the child into the world, as well as the anxiety of the pain.

    At the end of the day, Becky was asking for peoples c/s experiences. Not the opinion of someone who hasn't had one.

    I don't want to come across as rude to you... but putting the fear of god into Becky will not help her situation. She has to make a choice, and whatever choice she makes, she should (and will be) supported. Being advised is one thing, but personal opinions are another. And Becky has asked for experiences from both sides. I'm sure you told her your wonderful birthing experiences when she asked about natural birth.


  2. #20

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    OK, I think we need to get this back on track again. Jodie, yes Becky was asking for people's experiences, but she was also looking for advice too, which I'm sure could come just as easily from from someone who hasn't had a c/s.

  3. #21
    becky Guest

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    Min - I know exactly waht you mean. My son will be 21 months when Baby #2 is born, and he is such a Mummy's boy too. I could never not pick him up for 6 weeks!

    You have all been so helpful. I do think I am preferring to try natural again, but I still have quite a bit of time to think about it! Thanks heaps!

  4. #22

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    Becky, you do have a lot to consider and naturally people who have experienced one or the other will tell you how it was for them and that is great to know, but ultimately their annecdotes aren't going to be your experience when all is said and done. The fact is, you have given birth vaginally and I daresay you will be able to do it again - subsequent births are often very different to the first and chances are good that you won't need an instrument delivery or even have another bad tear.

    Take your time, research both sides of the 'argument' and then make the choice that is right for you based on what knowledge you have gained.

    Good luck with it Becky.

  5. #23

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    I've never had a c/s but I'm another with adhesions and scarring from pelvic surgery - mine are so bad that I have had to do IVF to conceive this time as the adhesions have blocked at least one of my tubes and caused some serious issues.

    So if c/s can cause adhesions - I'd avoid it!
    Last edited by Willow; April 28th, 2007 at 06:30 PM.

  6. #24

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    Becky - C/s certainly have their place in society and have saved many mothers and babies lives.

    I have experienced both a c/s and a VBAC. Myself and my husband think the same way where births are concerned - they should be as natural as possible.

    For me my c/s when I look back really wasn`t that bad but I did have emotional factors (and still do) I don`t feel like I ever birthed Matthew even though DH says I did, I was in recovery for 3 hours where I didn`t see my son or DH for that entire time I was never told where they were and vice versa, I was left there all on my lonesome. I healed well from the c/s even though I hated the recovery process and the pain.

    With my VBAC I received a 4th degree tear, my healing process took a long long time, much longer then my c/s (and I often brought this factor up) but I felt empowered that I had birthed my son (even if MIL says I didn`t - another story, another day...), I received skin on skin contact immediately after birth.

    I don`t have a say with my future births as the Dr`s say I will have to have a c/s and if and when I do I will make sure that I let them know I want both DH and bub with me in recovery for those precious few hours so I can feed my baby (Matthew went 3 hours before he was given his first b/f and was screaming by this time).

    As I said c/s do have their place and obviously for me it will be the best outcome to have my future bubs via c/s even though I would perfer VBAC, it`s just not meant to be.

    All the best Becky.

  7. #25

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    Becky,

    I too have had a c section with my first daughter and healed terribly. I did have a long labour before the surgery which Im told takes longer to heal after labouring and then an emergency c section. I really stuggled for 8 wks +

    Needless to say I am trying this time for a vaginal birth.

    I
    My skin has no elastacin and therefor needed a tummy tuck and breast reduction after Laynes birth. I am hoping this time the natural way will bring all things back together better after the birth.( we did think we were having an only child hence the ops)

    I too had to make the decision between vaginal or c section as I have a tumour on my overy that needs removal straight away after the birth. Some say it would be easier for the c section to get it over an done with, But i figure having a small cut just through my skin to remove it would be better than a c section being cut through all of them layours.

    In my experience i will try and avoid the c section at all costs.

    It is a great relief when you make your decision, so hopefully it will come to you soon, so you can get into the right head space, best of luck.

    Kelly

  8. #26

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    Thanks Caro

    Im glad you agree, most ppl say you might as well just have it done during c section, but its good to hear others can see my choice as more beneficial.

    Kelly

  9. #27
    Jodie259 Guest

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    Thanks for clarifying and expanding on your original comments Caro. Although Becky doesn't appear to have a fear of instruments, if she did; then there would be more chance of forceps & vaccuum in a natural birth.

    And when it comes to giving birth - there is no "norm".... all of the posts should indicate that everyone heals at different rates, and has different experiences (some good, some bad) regardless of what method of delivery a woman chooses. And that is the operative word - choose. In the 21st century - women are given a choice.

    And after carrying a baby for nine months in your stomach - it's unusual for a woman not to bond with it after birth. But then, some women who give birth naturally might not bond with their baby... or some women who have a c/s. Again - it's not the method of birthing - but the mother. And in your original post, you did not say "might be at risk". So thanks for clarifying that statement as that one offended me the most.

    This is not a debate - and I'm sorry to everyone that Caro & I may have difference of opinion. But I fully respect any womens choice of how they want to bring their child into the world. Becky has asked about natural birth experiences, and in this post she asked about people c/s experiences. Sure, the heading may be a bit ambigious, but the post did ask for peoples experiences rather then their natural birth experiences (which she has heard about). People were honest about their c/s experiences - the good, the bad & the ugly. So she had the opportunity to hear about their stories - not their research or their opinions. I would never consider going into a "natural birth" post and bagging someone's reasons for doing so. If I had nothing nice to say, I would say nothing at all.

    Sorry to Becky, and all others in this post who have shared their experiences. Everyone is entitled to their opinions but I was personally offended by some of those previous comments. I will not post further in this topic as I'm really not here to debate or defend or offend.

    Becky, good luck with your pregnancy, and whatever method you have to deliver your baby, rest assured that you WILL bond with your beautiful baby. You will be a great mother, and whatever method you decide to have will be wonderful as you will have bought another life into this world. And remember that whatever decision that you do make - may become out of your control anyway. People who decide on natural sometimes need to have c/s. And some who have elective c/s have natural as their babies can't wait to enter the world. Just enjoy the journey. There is no "easy" way to give birth. There can be complications which ever way you choose. But whatever happens, you will have a lifetime of joy from your child (and a whole lot a stress too! )

  10. #28

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    Ladies getting upset at one another's opinions is not helping Becky at all. Please provide your information and opinions by all means, but any unhelpful discussion or any posts which go against the spirit and the guidelines of the BellyBelly forums will be removed immediately. If you find yourself getting defensive and upset, the simple solution is to not post in this thread and perhaps not even read it if it gets you riled up. Now play nice

  11. #29

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    becky, I've had a c-section and a vaginal birth. I recovered much more quickly after the vaginal birth than after the c-section. If I were to have another baby I would probably choose to attempt a vaginal birth instead of a c-section.
    You might want to consider the toddler factor when making your choice. My first son was very upset the he couldn't sit on my tummy and that I couldn't pick him up. Because I wasn't expecting a c-section I hadn't had a chance to prepare him so it was probably a bit more difficult to deal with than if it had been a sceduled c-section.
    I'm equally bonded with both my son's and TBH I think I bonded faster with my c-section bubba than his brother.

  12. #30

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    Becky, I have not had a c-sect, but had a very bad tear after my first birth (not sure what degree, but all the way from one end to the other ) I have since had two natural births, both with tearing, but that was minimal. I found very little pushing when and after crowning occured helped a lot!

    Good luck
    Tanya

  13. #31
    tiggy Guest

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    Becky,

    I have had both a vaginal birth and 3 caesareans. Personally, I would take the vaginal birth. While a caesarean isn't so bad, in that the actual pain after the birth only lasts for a few days, the actual recovery, both physically and emotionally (for me) took longer.
    Also keep in mind that while you feel good and outwardly appear to recover well from caesarean, the 6 week period of no driving, lifting etc, is there for a reason.

    I once met a lady who had already had 1 c - section and who had not kept to her 6 week guidelines because she felt well. When she found herself pregnant she also found that she had so many adhesions from the previous section that her current pregnancy was full of strife. The doctor felt that it was due to her lifting etc following the surgery. Not sure if this is correct, so don't quote me on it but have always had that in the back of my mind, everytime I have needed caesarean.

    I guess for me, that is the one factor, I think you should consider. If this is not your last pregnancy what will be the after effects of this caesarean? Once your uterus has been cut, that will place you in a different risk group, if you want to attempt VBAC that will put alot of conditions on your birth and if you push yourself, following the caesar (as many of us do when we have other children to look after) what will be the prolonged after effects?

    I know that you have to make the decision that is right for you and I know that it is a hard one. Like many have said here, I encourage you to read and research and talk to as many people as you can, so that you can make an informed choice. Good luck and however you choose to birth your baby, I hope that it is everything you want it to be.

  14. #32

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    I just want to point out a few facts that could be helpful to becky

    1)
    Quote Originally Posted by Jodie259 View Post
    And after carrying a baby for nine months in your stomach - it's unusual for a woman not to bond with it after birth.
    As far as I am aware it is not unusual at all for a mother to not bond immediately with her child no matter what the circumstances of the birth were, and it is comments like these that can cause women to feel like they are abnormal or strange or have done something wrong when they do not bond with their babies.

    2)
    Quote Originally Posted by Jodie259 View Post
    The bonding risk is a complete lie. People don't bond with their baby for their own emotional reasons - wether they have a c/s or natural birth.
    I did not bond with Jackson for a long time and did develop PND, and some of the reasons for my feelings of inadequacy were due to having a caesarean and like Dee said feeling like I had not really given birth to my child, more like the Dr. had taken him from me. These kinds of feelings are more common in caesarean cases, therefore not a lie at all. And also the non-bonding isn't always due to the mother's own emotional reasons, it can be caused by PND which is often caused by some type of chemical and hormonal imbalance present in a great deal of mothers after the birth - in which the mother actually has no say in.

    It is wonderful that there are so many c/s success stories out there, I wish that mine was one of them, but it wasn't and I will never be able to change that, and anyone that ever asks me about it will always receive the honest to god truth, otherwise, what's the point in asking? I hope Becky if you do have a c/s that yours will be one of the successes - there is no reason why it wouldn't be.

  15. #33

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    I'll be honest and say that I HATED my cesarean. Absolutely hated it and if VBAC wasn't an option I wouldn't be having any more kids I hated it so much.

    I didn't want it in the first place (it was an "emergency" one) so that has a lot to do with my feelings about it.

    Physically I recovered well, and I've had no ongoing problems from it. I was back to normal activities (including driving) after a week.
    The operation was fine, even though it was an emergency c/s it wasn't particularly traumatic and it wasn't like DS or I were going to die any second or anything so I wasn't really scared or left with any trauma in that sense.

    But having had a vaginal birth though, in terms of the "birth experience", to me the c/section didn't even rate as one. It felt like my son was removed from me like an appendix. I didn't feel like I brought him into the world the same way as I did my first child.
    I really did hate it and I never want to have another one.
    Like you, my first vaginal birth was no walk in the park either - 36 hours, induced labour, epidural, vaccum extraction and a minor tear.....but I still prefer it any day over the emotionless, clinical, surgical delivery of my son in which I felt like I played no role at all.

    It's alot to think about, good luck with your decision.

    ETA just on the bonding issue, I do think bonding is influenced heavily by other factors besides how baby is born - I actually bonded much faster with my son - instantly actually - despite his birth being a caesarean and despite my negative feelings about that. I also did better with breastfeeding him - breastfeeding problems being another thing that often happens after c/s.
    It took me weeks to bond with my daughter and we didn't have a great time breastfeeding either and were finished by the time she was 2 months old. Bonding is very complex and alot of things come into play.
    Last edited by Tobily; April 29th, 2007 at 01:56 PM. Reason: add info

  16. #34

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    Hi Becky, welcome to BellyBelly!

    Firstly you need to ask yourself a few questions. Did you find your first birth to be a positive experience? If not is there anything you would want to change? There are many different sources that could help you if you do want to have a vaginal birth. Kelly has some amazing resources that she can recommend including multimedia and books, and sites, experts you name it to help you achieve the birth you want. As much as it is helpful to hear other peoples experiences regarding their c/s vs. their vaginal births realistically their own reasons for doing so in most cases are going to different from yours. So I'm not going to talk about my beliefs or my reasons for the births I chose (I had one emerg c/s & one vaginal birth after C/S) because I don't want to sway you in your decision but help by offering you the information you might need to reach a decision that is right for you. There are plenty of ways to help prevent tearing in birth. If you are after more information about tearing and how to prevent it there are plenty of resources. An active birth, and the position you give birth can also help prevent tearing, pushing when you are ready rather than purple pushing (which is pushing without the pushing urge) also prevents tearing. There are lots of things you can research. But ultimately you need to make the decision as to which is more preferable to you.

    I would really want to know more as to why your Dr thinks you should have a c/s as IMO a risk of tearing isn't really a big enough risk to warrant major surgery. Having said that if C/S is something you want regardless it can be a positive experience. Yes there are risks involved and it is wise to research them, but at the end of the day if you absorbed all the information you can (or want to) and find that for you in your situation a C/S sounds like the birth experience you want to have then there are ways to help ensure that you get the most positive C/S birth you can. Brooke (B456) had an awesome C/S experience. She is definitely someone to talk to if you do wish to have a C/S. Recovery time/pain for c/s is going to differ from person to person. And it also depends on the Dr you have and the form of suturing they use.

    So let us know what you want and what information you are after and I'll be happy to help.

    Goodluck!

    *hugs*
    Cailin

  17. #35

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    Hi Becky,

    I had an emergency c-sect almost 10 weeks ago. I recovered physically very well and very quickly. I found the first few days a bit painful but considering a c-sect is major abdominal surgery - I was expecting it! I unfortunately did experience a few complications during and immediately after my proceedure. I suffered excessive blood loss and only narrowly escaped a transfusion; i went into hypovolemic shock and lost consciousness (luckily that happened AFTER DD was born and had been taken to SCN!); I reacted to the drugs used in my epidural (could happen in a VBAC too). A couple of weeks after I got home I noticed a lump on my scar line which hurt like buggery - it was a hematoma and was resolved within a week. I felt well enough to go home on Day 3 but my Ob has a strict 5 day rule with her emergency c-sect so I was stuck in the hospital.

    My DD came out of the c-sect with a cut on her face just above her eye and some bruising on the same side of the face. This was from the forceps. Other than that - she did wonderfully.

    My regrets about my c-sect are emotional and situational (my milk took too long to come in because of the drugs I had, I felt like a failure because I hadn't VBAC'd, I resented that I didn't get to hold DD right away and that it was over 2 hours before I could hold her and some others).

    I did expect to cop a lot of flak for having a c-sect from people but, to be honest, I can count on one hand the number of people who have given me grief over it. Everyone else has been supportive and only a hand full of people actually know WHY I had a section.

    I'm sure you are aware a c-sect is major abdominal surgery and as with ANY type of surgery or medical intervention (which could happen with VBAC too), there are risks (which is why you're looking for people's experiences and opinions!). Your Ob should discuss these risks with you and is the best person to do so because s/he can tell you the likelihood of these risks in YOUR circumstance. You need to work out what is going to be best for you.

    Whatever you decide to do, there will be plenty of support for you here on BB.

    HTH

    MG

  18. #36
    paradise lost Guest

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    Hi Becky,

    I haven't had a c-sect so i only have anecdotals i'm afraid.

    My mum had 5 vaginal deliveries and 2 c-sections. The 1st c-section was an emergency for placenta praevia and the 2nd was elective (or rather, because they didn't allow VBAC then and she'd already had one section). She said she recovered much faster with the vaginal births (1st resulted in 2nd degree tear, no tearing to speak of for the rest, no stitches anyway) but that the c-sections weren't so bad. SHe also said the elective c-section led to MUCH faster recovery than the emergency - she thinks they were very rough as they were literally working to save her and my brothers lives by then - she had a general as there was no time for spinal. She said her scarline and just her guts generally felt badly bruised and painful for about 2 months after the emergency, but nothing like that after my birth, i was the last, the elective c-section, during which she had a spinal and watched the whole thing in the mirrors behind the bulbs in the surgical lamp. SHe said she felt fit and well a few weeks after my birth though she was a nurse so she did take it easy for the prescribed 6 weeks. My brother was nearly 4 and had been told about mummy not being able to pick him up etc. so i think it wasn't too bad.

    My cousin is a doctor and during her training she watched lots of deliveries of all kinds including on where during the incision-making to get to the baby the Ob cut a 4" long bone-deep slit in the baby's scalp/face which needed stitching immediately and through which he lost a fair bit of blood and ended up in SCBU. This IS NOT the norm, but it can happen.

    I think the instrument-damage risk is something which exists whenever instruments are used and you can maybe ask your ob to try to get the baby with his hands rather than using forceps, unless it is an emergency?

    Maybe you could look into ways to avoid tearing (as others have said, perineal massage during 3rd tri, no pushing from crowning, have the midwife support your perineum, maybe deliver on your hands and knees as this can relieve pressure from the perineum etc.) and also work out your preferences for a c-section in case you decide to have one (ie no instruments if poss etc.), then write down all your pros and cons (recovery time, risks, etc.) and see which one you're leaning towards.

    You've plenty of time to think about it at least.

    In my opinion (and that's all it is) i'd look into a vaginal birth. I know women who did NOTHING different and still tore FAR less with 2nd and subsequent babies, and there are lots of ways to avoid stitches in the hoohaa - having stitches in your uterus, muscles and belly seems the least attractive.

    Hana

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