Gender Disappointment?

[ttcno2]

Hi goodtotalk

well, as you can see, you're definitely not alone.
will you find out the gender before you have the baby?
i guess you've been through this before, so you know how it goes....you've coped with the disappointment and grief so you will cope with it again (if it works out that way of course)...i know it will be a bit different because it is your last, but probably not as different as you think. you will fall in love with your third daughter and one day you will forget that you felt so strongly about having a boy
maybe think back to how you coped last time and think about what helped - and do those things again.
keep seeing your counsellor and keep talking..
hugs to you, its hard

[Goodtotalk]

Hi ttcno2,

Thank you for your response, it really is helpful to feel heard and understood...and also reassured I will get through this if I don't have the little boy I am hoping for.
Yesterday I had some symptoms of an ectopic pregnancy so was sent along for a scan, thank God it was in the right place, I am not sure I could have coped with losing the pregnancy, the guilt I would have felt, surgery, the wonder of do you try again for a baby given my reaction this time around etc. So I am at least now sure terminating the pregnancy would not be a good idea.
Its great to have this forum and the people listening and supporting you-thank you.
To answer your question, yes, I will find out the gender of baby this time. The last two times I didn't and many said that would be better as I would fall for baby once I saw them anyway. It is a nice idea but for me It took me a month or two to connect with Samantha (even then tinged with some sadness that she was not a boy) so I feel I need to be prepared this time. My husband does not want to find out so will have to get around that. He is pretty disappointed in me that I am so focused on the sex of baby but guess he will have to understand that this is something I will need to know for my own sanity and preparation.