Hey Widdly, the one thing I hope you remember is that you haven't asked for anything you wouldn't have done willingly yourself. Theres no reason you should have to decide anything today, though, take your time, but don't let someone else guilt you into staying any longer than you think you should. If keeping you and making you feel loved and special were high on his agenda... Well, he would have done whatever it takes.
What would you tell a friend?
You deserve joy, we all do.
Take care and good luck