Dee,
I reqally agree whole heartly with what Monnie has written throughout her posts to you. Thanks for not making me have type lots on here! LOL

Defaintly seek out the issues around sensory processing, they play such an important role in a child's development, and whether they are over or under stimulated as well.

Im not a mother yet, but am an educator. Ive been going yep. thats so and so. From working closely with a parent during a long time case, the main thing I gained is not to be tricked into being "bated" by the child.And to remove an emotional response. I have worked with children where you were told things that in your own mind, you are screaming, going what the heck is going on, this child has just said what to me and I need to remain unemotional.
With the clothes it might be that there is too much choice for your child. Some children often need less option or else its all too confusing for them. So laying out say two outfits and giving a clear timeframe and explaining what will happen after that. "Ok outfit A or Outfit B, you have 3 mins to make up your mind or else I get to choose".

The other thing is that after a while the clothes may actually be hurting her. With one child at certain times, they would feel like like had been hit if people just brushed past them, and shoes would start hurting their feet. What is your daughter like in the bath or shower? Does she ever say that the water hurts her?