Trying to Conceive after Miscarriage or Loss ~ May 08 #2

[jen805]

KrystieLove-- No such thing as a stupid questions here--yes DSD is for my step daughter! It's definitely an odd feeling to feel so out of place, and it feels like your world has stopped moving, while everyone else just goes on with their day to day stuff. Something I always felt was like there was a slideshow that was on continuous play mode that would just keep playing in my mind. It just wouldn't stop, and I would constantly be analyzing what I could've done differently, or what I might have done wrong. Then the rush of emotions you get when you don't know what's going on with your body, and you just want everything to be over with so that you can get pg. again asap! The constant fluctuation of feeling up and down, backwards and forwards, all around--it can be all-consuming! I would definitely recommend getting the BT's done, it really helps just knowing what your body is doing, and knowing that things are moving forward. Hope you find the answers you're looking for, hun! Take care and huge

[Canary]

Hey everybody!

This thread is sooo busy that it is really hard to keep up! I have to confess that I have not read all posts as thoroghly as usual, as I'm in a hurry and about to go out. Sorry if I've missed any really important stuff!

Krystie, welcome. I am sure that you have found a warm and comfortable place to 'belong' to here. There is plenty of support and lots of ladies here who have been through similar stuff. I think that you are right about the hcg levels needing to go abck to normal before you O. Good luck with your ttc journey, I hope that things become easier to bear with time.

Thanks to plc, jen, mollycat, AJC Acria, Megsmum and Smilinatu for your GL and advice. I have absorbed what you have said and decided to take your advice!
I looked in the cupboard and found 3 HPT's! Thought I only had one! Am going to test tonight and if that is a BFN, will do FMU tomorrow.

I'll let you know the result!

[jen805]

Canary--:goodluck2: for your testing tonight! I'm you get a !!!!!!!!!

[smilanatu]

I am excited canary...keep us posted!

[plc1805]

Canary - GL honey - I'm focussing so hard on 2 lines for you sweet!!

[AJC]

Morning ladies - temp still up this morn. Hmmmmm, I might buy a pack of first response today ready for tomorrow.

I'm trying not to get my hopes up, after all I am taking b6 this month to extend my LP.

Hugs and babydust to all

[AJC]

Oooh - Canary. Good luck for you!

[mollycat]

Canary and AJC - for both of you.

Extension Update - It rained last night and we developed a leak in our loungeroom, luckily it missed the furniture and only got the carpet which I will rip up one day. Builders are here now and the roof is almost on, it still looks like it will rain sometime today, hope they can get that finished and the last wall boarded up. Then it's all inside work and I don't care if it rains.

[issy02]

Oh Canary....you have us sitting on the edge of our seats here....we are all for you babe!

smilanatu - sorry about th bfn, still might be a bit early though I think.

Jen and AJC- God you girls make me laugh....everytime I read your posts I have a giggle (not about the sad ones though, just the funny ones!) And Jen - you are particularly 'naughty' this week IYKWIM You're hilarious!

Welcome to the new ladies in here (sorry just as I started to write this I forgot the names and I dont want to click on back, cause last time I did that I lost my post ) Anyway, you have come to the right place....the ladies in here are amazing, they will brighten your day, laugh with you, cry with you and most importantly listen and support you. My TTC journey became a hell of a lot easier the day I found these ladies...GL to you all on your own TTC journeys, I hope they are short and sweet!

plc - im for you everyday....I just know everything is going to be ok, and you are going to see a little bean with a strong hb very soon, you're in my thoughts and prayers.

AFM - Im on cd7 I think, so not too long now before I the big O comes around again....think im going to start preparing myself for it....a bit of romantic touches, candles, chocolate, mood music....and maybe a 'movie' (Jen's suggestion...I think?)
Anyway, better spice it up....dont want DH to start feeling like he's a machine Although, that would never probably pass his mind, he just thinks he gets EXTRA lucky at ov time...honestly that man could bd on his death bed !

Ok thats it for now ladies....

for all

Issy

[Vanaithi]

Hello everyone!

Welcome Krystielove! Sorry for your loss.. we've all been through it and totally understand & sympathise with you & this forum is a great place for you to get support, answers if possible, or just to talk rubbish! a lot of that goes on around here!

jen: do babies come out of belly buttons too? maybe we've all been dtd at the wrong place hey!

Canary: :goodluck2: & hope you get a BFP tonight!

Everyone else: im that you all get s soon too!

Update for me: been hpting this week, 3 i think & all BFNs. I had a dream this morning that i stuck my finger down & there was blood! this is a sign that AF is coming... or i've been thinking about it too much... i think i will wait til AF comes... maybe in a week... just bought a saliva ovulation test & bulk ovulation & pg tests so should be very busy next month...

[Where there's hope]

Busy week for me, but I'm back.

JEN & PLC: A BIG thank you to for your support and positive vibes.

My week has also been one of complete paranoia. I too, have become absolutely obsessed (I too agree with the whole moving a plane flight so as not to miss "O" with DH). But my obsession is not with TTC, it is WHAT WENT WRONG when I had the silent MC weeks after the HB was seen.

It began when I pulled the plug on the whole IVF thing this week but was still given my Day 2 BT results and found that while my FSH was normal (4.2) I had a E2 of 119 which, from considerate "googling" means my egg quality may be on its way out. So I obsessed with that for a few days...

Then I started to freak out about AF - never the same between MC1 in Sept and MC2 in March. Only two or three days (not normal for me). It used to be a good 5 days. My last cycle before my last BFP was just 26 days (normally 28) So now I am obsessively self diagnosing for Ashermans or Luteal Phase Defect. For the latter I have upped my intake of B6 to 75mg and will anxiously await AF.

Meanwhile I have awoken with a sore throat on Day 19 (2 days DPO) which is very similar to what happened last time many, many days before my BFP ( +ve on Day 23). We only BD 4 days before O so should probably not conceive - my OB will be so cranky if I get a BFP and we did not wait it out this second cycle as he instructed!

This was a lot more drawn out then I intended. I really think I am going bonkers!

Sticky vibes to all of you!

[Katiegirl]

Where Is Hope - I just wanted to say that it is very normal to get paranoid and obsessive about TTCing and why MCs happen - so don't feel you are going bonkers. When I was temping I would sometimes have dreams about taking my temp that were so vivid that when I really did wake up I had trouble working out if I had already taken my temp. I also take a lots of supplements from my naturopath and I went through a stage when I would wake up suddenly in the night thinking I had forgotten to take something - and DH would have to reassure me I had (this drove him insane!). So as you can see - it gets into our sub-conscious because we so badly want answers and want solutions.

Take your time and be kind to yourself. I think we all could spend our lives trying to work out what happened with our Mcs - I know I have gone over dates trying to work out what I was doing - did I do something wrong etc etc, but I know in my rational moments that Nathaniel just wasn't meant to be with me for a long time.

As for AF - I only had it twice after my MC and D&C in Dec - but the first time it was 2-3 days and the 2nd time only about 3 days - and it was always 5 exactly. I think it is just your body repairing itself.

Big hugs to everyone on the TWW - I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

[Acria]

Canary and JC - Fingers crossed for you girls! Good luck and sending all my BPF thoughts your way, at least until the end of my cycle

Krystie - Welcome, as strange as it seems to welcome someone to a thread when they've been through something we wouldn't wish on anyone to get here. That was long-winded but what I mean is, welcome, and I am truly sorry for your loss. It is hard when you feel like you're 'in between', I went through the same sort of thoughts after my m/c last June, but the girls here are just lovely. You hang around, chat, cry, share..everything! We're all here for one another And likewise, I think getting BTs done to know where you are is probably a good idea. I didn't, but kind of wish I had because I was in such a state of confusion for a while afterwards.

Mollycat - oh no about the leak! Fingers crossed that the builders get a wriggle on and finish the roof and the wall. I don't like to wish away rain, but if it could just hold on until the roof and wall are up.. Good luck catching the egg!

Issy - lol about your DH. Mine's the opposite, he's such a sensitive soul, though denies it. it's not that he doesn't enjoy BDing, but if he's tired or a bit grumpy or has a hurt anywhere..it's a no go. So I just have to work a bit harder at those times to make sure he's decided it's worth, or more important than, the extra tiredness or whatever

Vanaithi - Try not to get too dosheartened by the BFNs, even though it is hard. I usually test early, when I know that even if I am pg, it's too early to show up, and wind up disappointed. Maybe try to hold out until AF is due or late, as hard as that is Sounds like you're ready and prepared anyway! I think the dream is maybe from thinking so much about the whole thing, I find I have dreams about things I have been thinking about/obsessing over It's not just you

WTH - my thoughts with you. After a loss, it's impossible not to start blaming ourselves and wodnering what we did, or what went wrong, even though logically we know that often it wasn't caused by anything we did or didn't do. In regards to the sore throat, well, anything's possible! When I got pregnant last year, it was by a very happy accident, days before I should have ovulated and in a very unhelpful position for conception...and I know it had to be that time because it was hectic time for us, we were moving and that was the only time we BDed in ages! So you never know

Sorry if I missed anyone! I'm going to have to start checking more frequently as I get left behind and then miss people!

As for me, I went out last night to see Christine Anu and Deni Hines with a few girls from work, it was good fun and I just drank water and lemonade, and no one even asked why I wasn't drinking my usual wine! Oh well, lol...I suppose that's good, becuase I find it very hard to lie and would have told them that we'd started TTC, and now that they don't know, it's a bit less pressure.

After the show last night, I weakened and bought two HPTs. I've had a few small..things which have got me thinking lately..wondering if maybe I got pregnant last cycle without realising. AF was a bit lighter and shorter last month, and my eyes have gone blurry, where I normally have perfect vision. Apparently pregnancy can cause the shape of your eyes to change due to fluid retention..so that was my first thought. Still, it came up BFN, of course. So I'm saving the other test until AF is due or late. I must be strong!

I think I have some EWCM starting, and at just about the right time. I'm on day 12..so I should be O'ing any day now. I'm a little freaked out though..I used to always get a pain when I was going to ovulate..and so far this month, nothing. There's been the odd twinge all through the month, but not the usual ovulation pain. Hopefully I'm still ovulating... Oh well, drag Dh into bed tonight..and tomorrow..and the next day...and hope for the best.

Lisa xx

[issy02]

Hi girls, this is just a quick post to share some info.....

I heard someone in this thread talking about maca (sp?) powder a while ago, and I just wanted to say that another lady that I chat to in this forum had been ttc for nearly 2 years i think. Then she tried maca powder in march (and DH took it as well) and she ended up with a bfp by the end of the month! She is now 14 weeks pg and doing fantastically So...even though im not sure what it is, im going to get some....TODAY!

Got nothing to lose right? Anyway, just thought Id share that with you all, it may have nothing to do with her bfp that month, but hey, you just never know

Issy

[Abbey B]

just a quick post so no time for personals sorry


Does anyone get a feeling even before they O that this month will be "the month"? I have been feeling abit like this in the last few days and its driving me insane!! I know that there is only a small chance of it actually happening but still i feel like we'll catch it..

I found a website explaining some of the things that maca powder does Issy.

Maca Powder and female fertility

Looks interesting and like you said, what have you got to lose??


GL to everyone.. Hope you get a BFP this month..

[Mel A]

Wow! I go away for 1 week and i've missed an entire closed thread, took me a while to re find you all.
Me I've been in Sydney. All work and no play. But I'm back in Melbourne and at 8 DPO. So, smack bang in the middle of the TWW.

Good signs, I had slight spotting at 2 DPO or was that 3, thats another sign i've totally lost my ability to remember stuff. Plus I sneezed today at work, and had the tight pain in my abdomen.

Not reading anything into this, but thought i'd share so you can all wait the next week with me.

to the newbies, my thoughts are with you.
to everyone else, remember to smile.

ing. Mel

[jenushka]

What a busy thread! We are definitely a chatty bunch aren't we? I'll try and get to everyone...

Mel A - I hope the signs you had are signs ... less than a week of the 2ww to go.

Abbey - I DEFINITELY get that feeling each month. I think its my poor brains way of motivating me after being let down by AF - its what keeps me going. Thanks for the link on maca powder

Acria - great to hear you are having some fertile signs, have fun bd'ing and fingers crossed you catch that eggie!

katiegirl - thanks for dropping in and keeping an eye on us! I hope evrything continues to go well...

where theres hope - sorry to hear how your mind has been treating you lately... I do know from experience that google does not play nicely when you're feeling a bit worried about something. This is a great place to get it all out ... Hope you are feeling better soon

vanaithi - i hope you get some answers soon. Good luck for whenever you decide to test again

issy - wow... o time does come around quickly. Enjoy the rest in the lead up to next week - sounds like you'll be busy! At least you have a more than co-operative dh

mollycat - sorry to hear about the leak in the house - hope the builders managed to get it all done before the rain.

AJC - oooohh, did you buy the hpts? gl for whenever you decide to test and make sure you tell us the result!

Canary - the suspense is killing me! What time is it over there? Have you tested yet?!! Fingers crossed for you hun

jen - like everyone else has said - you make me laugh! I know this is a delayed reaction but 5 times in one day??!! You go girl! The first and only time dh and I were that active in one day was 8 years ago!! I think we're still in shock. And I'll be pulling out all stops this month to catch the eggie and enjoy ourselves at the same time, so thanks for the tips on watching "movies"! Candles, massages and maybe a bit of "grooming" a la Brazil (ouch!) could be on the cards too. I'll stop there before I get even further into tmi land! You are just such a crack up, make me smile and always have a kind sincere word whenever anyone needs, so thank you

Krystielove - Welcome and . What you are going through is so incredibly difficult, but you are in the right spot now - the ladies here are so completely understanding and supportive. I hope you can get some answers with your hormone levels soon

To everyone else - I hope you are either doing ok with witchface AF/going well with the bd'ing and catching the eggie/not going too insane in the 2ww/or that you get your bfp if you are testing soon!!

AFM - I changed my flights yesterday - now flying to Syd a week after I was going to (always knew I would!!). Thank you all for your advice and opinions and for making me feel like I wasn't too obsessed, rather dedicated (thanks Jen!). DH was really good about it too, and told me he thought I should change them as well. He just keeps saying "eye on the prize" in a bit of a jokey way but am glad to see that motivated approach from him as well this cycle Other than that I'm on cd 3 (ho hum!) - am eating LOTS of sushi and smoked salmon and caramel sundaes and drinking wine and enjoying the good bits of not being utd.

Oh yes, and in case anyone else ever needs to know - my research on St John's Wort/sperm showed that it does have a strong demonstrated effect on sperm motility, viability and their ability to penetrate an egg. DH had finished on it anyway as of last weekend and it should be out of his system soon... wished we'd done the research before he started taking it...

BBC News | Health | Herbal remedies may reduce fertility

Take care and for you all...

[~ Mylitta ~]

Hi everyone

Jen - Thanks for the explanation on DSD, lol. I have two DSS (hopefully that's the correct abreviation for step-sons hehe). They are 8 and 11 at the moment and they are both wonderful. I always gotten along really well with them and since DH and I got married about 2 months ago they have started to call me "mum". I never dreamed that they would make the choice to start calling me that! It's pretty special

Canary - Thank you for the welcome and good luck with your test!

AJC - Good luck if you are testing tomorrow!

Where there's hope - I was trying to place blame on myself for a while too, but I've decided to trust my obstetrician who has assured me that there is nothing I could have done any differently. I'm sure it's the case for you too sweetie.

Acria - I knew exactly what you meant I'm just thankful that there is a place where we can all come where everyone understands each others situation and can sympathise. It really helps knowing that there are people out there that care and can hold you hand (even virtually over the internet, lol) through tough times and help you see the sunshine after the rain.
Oh, and how was Christine Anu and Deni Hines?