Trying to Conceive after Late Loss/Recurrent Miscarriage/Stillbirth ~ March 09

[Berry1]

Hi Bec,

Our posts just crossed over. I will look into Vitex and interesting to see that you are on B6 as well. Obviously it is fine then to take both of these. Is is possible to 'overdose' on progesterone? I feel like I have just 'found the light' - lol! I hope this is the answer I need. I will also look for that book. Many thanks to you.

[mummabec]

Hi Berry, the vitex doesn't have progesterone in it... it's an old herb that more regulates your hormones than giving you any iykwim. It's also called chaste tree or chaste berry if you are looking it up.

The book also teaches you to use charting to avoid pregnancy too - hard as that is to imagine at the moment! I had to order it in at a local bookshop when I bought it last year. Actually I'm very fond of Fishpond.com.au: Online Book Store | Buy Books Online in Australia atm. It's like amazon (in that there's a lot of books available) but Australian. They might have it.

Bec xx

[Berry1]

Thanks again Bec. I will be running out to get those herbs & B6 tomorrow. Feeling very optimistic again. This is making a lot of sense to me and am I convinced this has been a problem for me. I've never heard of fishpond.com.au, thanks for the tip & advise, very grateful. X

[dd0207]

Megan sweets, I know how frustrating and discouraging it can be after falling fairly quickly then nothing.... I fell first month with Sebastian and my other 2 angels (one of them on the pill mind you) and this time after 6 months of trying to no avail, I decided to do IVF as you know. My decision was based on age and more importantly emotional stability and I am so glad I did. The pressure was just getting too much and putting a big strain on my relationship with DH as I'd make him BD almost every day from cycle day 10 to at least cycle day 25 as I never knew when I was going to O as my cycles were very irregular after losing Sebastian. DH was getting to the point where he'd say "pleeeeease don't make me have sex with you!"

I hope these herbs that Bec suggested work for you hun otherwise it probably can't hurt to go to an GYN/OB and have a little check up. It will at least put your mind at ease and you can eliminate all the "what if" questions that are probably going through your mind right now.

Hi to all, have to rush to a meeting but will be back soon x

[Berry1]

Thanks Diana. Your poor DH, I'm sure after that experience he won't be complaining for a long time IVF was obviously the right thing for you to do and look at you now, I find the whole process so amazing. I feel fairly confident that I can conceive naturally. I do believe that my cycle is just still out of whack after the loss. Given my luteal phase was 'acceptable' at 14-days last cycle for the first time is a good sign that things are starting to correct themselves naturally. I bought the B6 & Vitex today. I read that they cannot cause any harm, even if pg, so it is worth using them to assist. It is all very frustrating, but I am really praying that it helps me this cycle. It feels good to be at least doing something proactive. Fingers crossed.

[Miss.B]

Megan, I really hope those vitamins really help to put you back on track, fingers and toes crossed hun!!!!

Dee, sending you the stickiest of sticky vibes I can muster hun

Girls, have not been feeling all the best, feel a bit run down so I will try and post a little bit later. Plus I couldn't get on line yesterday so it's all too much for me ATM posting this from work.

B xxx

[helle]

Beata, I hope you're feeling better soon, chicky.

[Zachary's Mom]

Hi everyone

Sorry I have been MIA. My modem has a virus so I am struggling to log onto the internet. First time in ages I have been able to get onto a website.

Hope you are all keeping well.

I have a doctors appointment tomorrow and so far everything seems to be going fine. Just my mental state that is hard to deal with. We have tried to find out the sex of our bub at last scan but bub had umbilical cord between it's legs so they couldnt tell us.

Take care everyone.

[dd0207]

Beata, rest up as much as you can and get better soon sweets. You must be in prime health for your upcoming transfer in just a few short weeks! Not sure if the time has flown for you hun but I can't believe we are almost there. Seems like yesterday you went in for your operation - to me that is, I'm sure for you it's a different story!

Dee, fingers crossed this little embie is a super sticky one.

Theresa, nice to hear from you. WOW, almost 22 weeks! Where has the time gone?

I will be off-line for a while as I'm going in for my stitch on Friday and won't have access to a computer. Have decided to have tomorrow off and spend time for myself (grooming!).

I actually have to stay in hospital until at least Monday. Jo and Helen, your procedure was just a day surgery right? Not sure why my OB wants me to say in all weekend but said that's what he would prefer and he will scan me on Monday then decide whether I can go home.

A big hello to all our mammas and mammas to be and a huge amount of love and luck to our TTC-ers. Here's to some BFP very soon.

Love D x

[Chez67]

Hi everyone

Just popping in to say :hi: and check on my pg & TTC friends. Hope everyone is doing well.

Hope you all had a lovely Mothers Day. I managed to get through it but it was much harder than I thought. I had convinced myself just to try to be 'normal' and keep busy. But it didn't really work. DH took me out for breakfast (very sweet) but we were surrounded by mums with babies EVERYWHERE! I guess that's to be expected in hindsight. Anyway, after that we just had a quiet day hiding from the world as I shed my tears in private.

Also, I was reading Berry and Bec's conversation about cycle lengths and vitex/chaste tree. I have also heard good things about vitex. The Fertility Doctor web site has lots of info about herbs and their use. There is even a 'recipe' for conception which includes other things like Robotussin cough mixture (for CM production apparently) on the baby and bump web site (try googling 'vitex recipe' for the link or I can PM it to you) and also some info on using vitex.

I am taking evening primrose oil for the first time this cycle to try to help with CM production (I've been a little hit and miss in this department in the past) and my TCM tells me it's compatable with the herbs she has me on, I just shouldn't take it after ovulation.

Anyway, best of luck ladies with the herbal remedies. They certainly have given me much better results than anything else, including IVF!

A big hi to everyone else. Sorry for lack of personals... have to rush off to the dentist (yay!). BBL

Cheryl xo

[Joselyn]

Hi girls,

Just wanted to pop in and say hi to everyone.

Just thought I would let you girls know that I went to the doc and he found an infection which I think Diana you and I had both mentioned could have (and their could be so many reasons but...) been the reason for my early labour last year in Nov. The docs said it was due to incompetent cervix but my new Ob said he wasn't convinced. He said it could have been due to an infection or placental bleeding - (not ruling out IC ofcourse but keeping an open mind on the other possibilities). As it turned out I got tested for this last week and it came back positive. Its an infection called Ureaplasma. Its apparently very common in all women but can cause early labour/miscarriage if left undetected/untreated. Its a really simple swab test that takes a few seconds and I can honestly say that I had never been tested, let alone heard of this test before. I really wanted to pass this on to you girls so you could do your own research and have a conversation about it to your docs. I am on a course of antibiotics for 6 days and it'll be gone. So its nothing bad if you do find you have it.

Having an internal done next week to check if cervix is shortening - will keep you girls posted.

Chez I hope you got through MD ok - I think we were all in such similar positions. I was feeling very sad too since two of my girlfriends were celebrating their first MD and I was supposed to be celebrating with them I guess we're all still mothers though. Even if people can't see our little darlings...

Teags and co. hope you are doing well. Still so happy for you

Girls, I feel really lucky to have found this forum and I pray to whoever it is I think I turn to that its not too far for you now.

Much love, Jos/Jas xxx

[ferrals5]

Hi Ladies
Just popped in from another thread and thought i would add my 2 cents worth on vitex and robitussin my DH and i tried for 4 mths before i started using vitex than i saw somthing on a fertility site on robitussin for cm as i never have any (always dry until we BD) so i took it as they recommend and i noticed a change in days and then that month i got a BFP so now this is my first month of TTC again and i'm taking both so we will see what happens.

[mummabec]

Hi everyone,

Beata, hope you're feeling brighter soon.

Theresa, will you get another chance to find out the sex? Are you having another scan? Hang in there emotionally. Must be really hard

Diana, hope the stitch op goes well and that your grooming day is relaxing.

Cheryl, sorry to hear you had a hard time at mother's day breakfast. Some days I feel like babies are following me around and it's very sad. I started crying in the shopping centre today. Thanks for the tip about the evening primrose and the Robotussin. I am pretty lacking in the CM department at the moment.

Jos, glad they picked up the infection, but it must be hard having that uncertainty about why you went into labour early. Good luck with the internal.

AFM got through my first mother's day without Luca. My sister made a big fuss about it being her first Mother's Day and eventually i said 'It's a big day for me too - it's my first mother's day without one of my children'. But no one at our well attended extended family picnic wanted to talk about Luca

I've been feeling so sad lately. Have a cold which is not helping. Got some of Luca's photos reprinted today so I'm going to redo his album. I'm going to a SIDS and Kids nurturing our memories day on saturday (they provide support to people with perinatal loss from all causes in Victoria now) so I'm taking some photos to scrapbook. Was a bit sad/angry as the lady at the photo shop forgot to put borders on one packet of photos. She redid them and instead of just giving me the other ones for nothing offered to sell them to me for half price. Of course I had to buy them as I couldn't have anyone throw Luca's photos away, even though they were not how I wanted them

For those of you without living children, I came across this a little while ago:

A mother is never ?unfinished.? No matter how brief her time was with her child, the bond of love between mother and child was complete. A mother?s love for her child is unending. Dreams may shatter and circumstances may change, but a mother?s love remains strong. As a mother travels the path to healing, it is important for her to remind herself often that she is a mother forever. Her motherhood did not stop when her child died. This understanding of motherhood releases the feelings of guilt and failure and allows a mother to begin to see herself as a whole person again-a complete mother.

xx Bec.

[Miss.B]

Hi Girls,

Belly keeps crashing on me again, not happy Jan!!! Will have to make this post quick just i case I lose it....

Bec, just wanted to give you huge hugs hun. I think it's pretty awful that no one wanted to talk about Luca on your Mother's day! I can't believe how some people, and it hurts just that little bit more when it's your own family, will go to great lenghts to avoid any mention of our little babies that we've lost. I think for next time hun, and any time not just Mother's day, talk about Luca and let them know it's OK to talk about your little boy. I think that they very well might be uncomfortable and afraid to talk about him as it might make you upset and sad. Yes it will make you sad, but also very happy that they acknowledge him!!!! My psychologist told me that if people don't mention Joshua so much these days (and they don't!!) it's because they are afraid that it might upset me. I would love for them to mention him!! She said it's important to educate people.

Theresa, so excited you're up to 22 weeks already!! How time just flies. I hope you can find out the sex of your baby soon, I couldn't wait to find out about mine!!

Dee, still sending you lots of sticky vibes for your little one, please, please stick little bubba!!!!

Teagz, hi sweetie, thanks for your kind words, I'm feeling a bit better now. I think the flu shot is keeping me from catching all these nasty colds going around at work ATM. Not long to go until 22nd now!!! Good luck hun, I pray everything goes well for you.

Diana, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you for Friday . All will go very well hun, I am sure. Thanks for all your lovely words of encouragement sweets, love ya heaps xxx

Cheryl, my Mother's day was pretty hard too, I wished with all my heart that Josh was here with us Sending you many hugs and as many sticky vibes as I can muster for your next cycle, pleeeeeeeese give us some good news soon!!!!

Jas, I'm so glad they have picked up the infection so soon, I am sure all will be just fine hun. Still, like the others have said, it must shake you up a bit when these things happen!! Fingers and toes crossed for a smooth run for you now hun

Megan, hope these new herbs are doing their magic hun!!! I really feel you're onto something here, let it be the answer to your problem pleeeeeeeeese!!!!! Bring on the BFP for you sweets!!!!

Nae, hope is all well with you sweets, any more of those nasty earth tremors??

Hello to all my other lovely friends, to all those TTC many sticky vibes and baby dust, and for our lovely mummas big hugs

AFM, I spoke to my IVF nurse yesterday and I'm supposed to fill in some new forms including one which is a police check (helloooooooooo!!! I am not a crim!!!) and I'm supposed to keep track of my ovulation in the FET cycle so I figure I will practice in this month's cycle in preparation for June. Yay!!!!!

B xxxxxx

[Zachary's Mom]

Hi Ladies

dd207 - Thanks! I can't believe it is 22 weeks already either! 3 more months to go!

mummabec - Yes it is very hard emotionally. I am struggling to visualize a positive outcome. to get to the 35 week stage seems a lifetime away. We are hoping to find out the sex - next scan on the 16th June. So we will hope then!!! I know what you mean about Mother's Day. We had a big family gathering and everyone was all about their babies and kids and I was really sad. Then someone said to me - don't worry about it - yo will have your turn next year! Well - I was so angry - after all I AM a mother! Sorry to hear you are feeling sad - I have been too. That passage yo found is beautiful and brought tears to my eyes - wish other people would understand that. Take care of you.

Beata - Hi hunny! How are you? Can't wait for your BFP!!!!! Take care of yourself. Thinking of you always.

Hi to everyone else. Still trying to catch up but I wish you all the very best on your TTC journey.

[AngelLukesmum]

Hi
Just wanted to quickly wish Diana luck for her operation on Friday - a big day! And yep, when I had the stitch I only had to stay in for the day but sounds like your ob is being extra careful so that is great.
Hope it all goes well; looking back it wasn't pleasant but gee was it worth it...!
Wish me luck in getting Kaitlyn settled in bed so I can finally go to sleep!
Love to all x

[mummabec]

Theresa, I can imagine your pregnancy must seem to be going very slowly. We lost Luca at 35 weeks and 6 days so very similar to you. I'm sure I will be worried until I have my next one actually in my arms. That's horrible about someone telling you you'll have your turn next year. Honestly some just do not think.

Someone gave me a photocopy from a book the other day and it had a poem about not being afraid to make me cry. It's a bit long to type out but some of it is:

Really, tears are not a bad sign you know!
They're nature's way of helping me heal.
They relieve some of the stress of sadness.

I know you fear that asking how I'm doing brings me sadness...
but you're wrong.
The memory will always be with me,
Only a thought away.
My tears make my pain more visible to you,
but you did not give me the pain... it was already there.

... talking to you releases what I've been wanting to say aloud,
clearing space for a touch of joy in my life.
I'll cry for a minute or two...
and then I'll wipe my eyes,
and sometimes you'll even find me laughing later.

Bec xx

[Berry1]

Theresa, nice to hear from you. It feels like just yesterday that you got your BFP, nice to see you at 22-wks already. I hope bub co-operates at the next scan so you can see if its a boy or girl

Beata, I am glad you are getting things moving now. Yes that is strange about the police check?? Not long now, you have been so incredibly patient, I really pray you are rewarded with your long awaited healthy bub first go

Bec, I hope the SIDS / Kids nuturing day was theraputic for you today The scrapbook sounds like a lovely idea. Note sure what is wrong with the photoshop lady, really!

Jas, it sounds like you have a good OB there, thank goodness! Great that he/she got you tested for this infection and that it has been treated this time. Thank you for sharing this info with us, I found that that it is sites like this that inform me more than the medical industry sometime. All the best to you hun, I hope this gives you more confidence in your pg.

Cheryl, interesting that herbs etc have been really helpful to you as well. I had a look at those sites you suggested and it seems that taking B6 & Vitex together is 'common', so gives me some confidence. One thing I wanted to ask, and Bec you may be the best person to answer, I read that some suggest stopping Vitex after ovulation and others say not to stop until a BFP as it can take a while to build in your system. What have you been told?

Diana, I hope that the stitch op went well for you. I am sure it wasn't pleasant, but as Jo said, very well worth it. I hope you are recovering well

I got a call from the hosp this week to say Jasmine's autopsy results have finally come in (7-months later!). We have made an appointment to see them in 2-wks. I think it will give me final closure as to what happened and to hopefully have more confidence about my next pg, which I hope is really soon.

Hope everyone is well. We are due for some more BFP's this month girls