Trying to Conceive after Late Loss, Still Birth or Recurrent Miscarriage April '08

[Katiegirl]

Hi Everyone. I am back from Tasmania. Thank you all for your lovely thoughts and words in memory of Nathaniel. Last Wed ended up being quite a nice day - we got up early and went to the beach - the sunrise was not so great but I am still glad we did it. We then went to church for a 9am service and then straight to the airport to catch our flight. I think the day was not overly difficult was due to the fact that we had taken the time to remember Nathaniel and give ourselves the space we needed. Tasmania was lovely and it made me realise how much we needed a break from the everyday.

Today we had our 12 week scan and all was great news. The baby is measuring 12 weeks 3 days and had a good strong heartbeat. All was good and was a great relief. We now start having weekly scans with my ob until I am either sick of them or more relaxed.

Good luck to everyone else having a scan or test this week.

Jo - I will definitely be thinking of you this Saturday. I can recommend doing something special for Jack - even if it is just something little like lighting a candle - as I do believe this helped me. I still found the days leading up to the EDD difficult but I found I would have a good cry and then keep going - rather than it being the start of a deeper grief. So please take care of yourself and I hope your DH proves to be supportive.

I will write more later - thanks again to you all for being so wonderful.

[jen805]

Katiegirl--Glad to hear you're back safe from your trip, and that all went well. I think you definitely needed and deserved the break! Congrats on your 12 wk. u/s and strong I'm sure the weekly scans will help keep your sanity!

[Simba]

katie - so glad that the scan went well and that your time away was a positive experience - even if, as i'm sure it was, a very emotional time as well. i am looking forward to seeing your ticker soon... i nearly did one the other day then i chickened out! hopeless i know. i have my 12 week scan in 2 weeks so i think i will put one on. anyway all is well with me but bit tired so think i will drag myself off to bed now so hi to you all and hope that you are doing well and will do some more personals tomorrow.

[jo76]

hey everyone!
well, officially i got hit for 2 days straight with the worst nausea i have ever felt...to the point i vomited! Blah! I felt so disgustingly crappy after i last posted i am surprised i could function. The nausea has gone now thank-fully but i have the sorest throat now-so i really hope i am not getting sick or i'll be dragging myself off to the docs! I have lost a bit of weight which i am little concerned about as i don't want that to happen either. One of my friends who knows said that i always lose weight when i am pregnant at the start which i have never really noticed, perhaps due to losing Jack i am just trying to be more on top of what my body is doing!
katie - so glad you found comfort in your trip! and that all went well on nathaniels special day! I am really happy to hear about your scan! that is one of the really important ones so its a big boost for yu to have it go so well, although i am still nervous i am a little excited that i will be 8 and a bit weeks for this one on monday and then get another peek 4 weeks later for the 12week! I'll be shattered if my dates change backwards as the 8 weeks have already raced by! As for jack -i do have a candle from his service that was especially made for us through our celebrant. My other 2 kids have the same candle with their names on it also from their naming days so i will def light that. But i want to do something else so i am sitting quietly...waiting for the right inspiration to come my way. Maybe we're not meant to do anything but just go along our day...i'm not sure. I am usually so good at things like this for friends, just can't think for myself!
jen -thanks for your kind words re: jack and ultrasound!
barbara - hope you are going ok and feeling good! thinking of you!
tm - ??? really hope all is well!
take care everyone!
talk soon!

[jen805]

jo--Hope you're feeling better today! again on your scan next week!

[jo76]

hi!
just a quick note from me as today has already started my emotions off.

Tomorrow is Jacks EDD so please be thinking of him and his sweet button nose and say a prayer or light a candle, whatever you want to do to pay respect to his memory. There is a song FLY by Celine Dion, if you have a chance to listen to it, please do so as this is his song. (it was a part of his service)
Celebrate your day Jack, by playing with all the other angelbabies!
xxx

[jen805]

jo--My thoughts and prayers are with you and your sweet angel Jack today! I lit a candle and said a prayer to celebrate Jack's special day! We're all here for you!

[cindee]

love and wishes to all.
hoping im going to be pregnant soon, bit scary though.

[sryan]

Hi Cindee,

Hello and

Sorry to hear of your losses last year and I wish you all the best in TTC.

I look forward to getting to know you.

xxx Sue xxx

[jen805]

Jo--I hope you had a happy, peaceful day in remembrance of Jack yesterday. He gets a whole other day of thoughts and prayers, as it's only Sat. here right now! Will light another candle and say another prayer for him--and also for you and your family.


Simba, Katiegirl, and Anthonysmom--Hope you're all


Hammi-- It's been a while.... Hope you're doing ok, you and Hamish are also in my thoughts and prayers.


AFM...I hope you ladies don't mind me posting in this thread--have been realizing that it says :TTC after late loss, and my loss was at 8 wks (but I thought I was 13 wks). I have had 4 m/c, however, so I hope that counts towards the recurrent m/c--I just want to make sure I'm not somehow offending anyone by being here! Hope you all have a great Sunday (except for Anthonysmom--have a great Saturday!)

[Katiegirl]

Hi all. Hope you had all had a nice weekend.

Jo - I hope yesterday was okay for you, even though I am sure it was emotional. I just know that all our angels were keeping each other company and watching over us.

Jen - of course you are welcome here. This thread is for people who have had late losses, stillbirths AND recurrent miscarriages. Having 4 mcs must be so difficult, and no matter at what stage they happen. So you have not offended anyone, and are most welcome here amongst us. It is just so sad that we are all here in the first place. So please feel very welcome to join us as we are all here to support each other.

[Rozzie27]

Hi ladies,

this is my first post here. I lost my first child, a son, a week and a half ago. He was 22 weeks and died with no warning in utero.

Having started to read these forums, I see that most stillbirths occur close to full term (although there are plenty that are much earlier). My question to those who would like to answer is, for those who did experience the terrible loss, did you find a reason? At this stage it appears we will have no reason... I guess I'm interested to know because DH and I would like to start trying again soon. It hasn't been long I know, but we really want children, and this is the only way to do it! Unfortunately because I had a surgical birth we can't try till after the 2nd cycle.

I'd appreciate your advice. Whilst in a way it was comforting to know that there was nothing anyone could have done to save our son, at the same time it's terrifying that it may just as easily happen again (though statisically that's unlikley, but I'm allowed to be irrational right now!).

Rozzie

[jen805]

Rozzie. I'm so sorry to read of your loss. I pray that you find peace and comfort here with us. I wish I had an answer to your question, did your dr. ever run any tests to try to figure out why this happened? And you're not being irrational just because you're worried that it could happen again--that's natural after what you've been through! I hope your 2 cycles go by quickly so you can start trying again soon. You're in my thoughts and prayers, hun, take care of yourself!


Katiegirl--Thanks so much--I actually feel really relieved! I just didn't want to step on anyone's toes or anything, KWIM? thanks for being here (although I wish none of us had to be)!

[jen805]

Rozzie. I'm so sorry to read of your loss. I pray that you find peace and comfort here with us. I wish I had an answer to your question, did your dr. ever run any tests to try to figure out why this happened? And you're not being irrational just because you're worried that it could happen again--that's natural after what you've been through! I hope your 2 cycles go by quickly so you can start trying again soon. You're in my thoughts and prayers, hun, take care of yourself!


Katiegirl--Thanks so much--I actually feel really relieved! I just didn't want to step on anyone's toes or anything, KWIM? thanks for being here (although I wish none of us had to be)!

[Hammi]

Rozzie, I also lost my 22wks son. They did a blood test on me on the day to check for infections and found none. They also did a post-mortem on my baby but I haven't received the results yet. I have read that about 30% of stillbirths have no evident cause.

I'm due back to my hated obstetrician for a check-up next week where I'll ask more about what happened and also when we can start trying again. I understand how you feel, I desperately want to hold a baby in my arms and hear it cry and see it open its eyes.

Good luck Rozzie and feel free to vent, we all know how you feel.

Hi Jen, thanks for checking up on me. I'm doing OK. We collected Hamish's ashes last week and it's a real comfort to have him home with us. I'm also distracting myself with looking after my health and trying to be in a positive frame of mind about the future.

[jen805]

Hammi--I'm so happy to hear you feeling so positive about the future! My dad passed away from a brain tumor 5 years ago, and my step mom still keeps his ashes next to her bed. It provides her with great comfort, so I can only imagine how comforted you would feel to have him home with you. I wish you luck at your appointment, and I hope you get the green light to begin your TTC journey. Please feel free to join us in the TTC after M/C when you're ready, I would love to see you there! We're planning a mass exodus into the Pregnancy after M/C thread! Take care, hun!