Just want to send lots of positive baby vibes to DD for tomorrow. I hope you get the BFP you long for...but if not just know that your next baby is just waiting for the perfect moment to come along. Make sure you post the results. Fingers crossed!!!
Welcome to Beata and Zachary'sMum. I am so sorry to read of the passing of your precious boys. I hope you find comfort and support here amongst these very special women. Trust that no matter what you tell us, we will all be nodding our heads and understanding. The TTC journey after losing your baby is a tough one, but also comes with its own rewards.
Welcome Beata, sorry there is a need for you to join us here . Sounds like you have had a difficult time. I am sure you are nervous about the op, but its great that it is coming up soon so you can get on with TTC again. I am sure you are in good hands.
Helen, great news about the flutters
Theresa, thinking of you. I do hope you get through Christmas ok. It is very cruel that this happened so close to you being induced. The fact that you conceived Zachary is a great sign that you will conceive again. Zachary will always be in your heart, never to be replaced, but I am sure that you will have a baby in your arms one day. All the best for TTC in 2009. A lot of us here are with you!
Thank you so much for your welcoming and reassuring message. I really am feeling so much better and more positive about the op since I realise that the sooner it's done the quicker I can try for a bub again. I am so sorry for your loss, it's still so fresh and so raw, you are in my heart and in my thoughts .
Theresa, I am so sorry for misspelling your name !
Thank you Katiegirl for welcoming me to your wonderful group. I really feel like I have found a place I fit in. I feel I am being understood, sadly by women who have gone through the same heart breaking experience ( oh how I wish we didn't have to ). Only you can truly understand, and feel my pain. I also feel your pain, and am so happy that you now have a beautiful bub to love and cherrish.
Wow!! hard to keep up with everyone's happenings at present!!!
Firstly, welcome to Theresa and Beata. You both have such sad and familiar stories, my deepest sympathies to you as you spend Christmas without your babies. Theresa, I think you may have posted your story but I can't recall, did they find a cause for Zachary's passing? 35 weeks is so tough, so close.
Beata, I hope your surgery goes well. I think we're probably in a similar position with regards to the uterus scar, I had to have a C-section but because the lower, non-muscular part of the uterus doesn't form till 28 weeks or so the scar may end up in the muscular part which makes labour more dangerous with a higher risk of uterine rupture. But aside from that and a higher risk of placenta accreta (which can be monitored and managed) you should be in prime baby-making shape soon!!!
Diana, your DH sounds like a gem, I can't picture mine googling spotting haha!! I had implantation spotting as well, both times, it's not over till it's over!!
Helen, I am with you on the BH... I have them all the time, like hourly, and got them from 16 weeks at the latest. I was quite perplexed as I was in bed and I'd wake up and my belly was all hard and all on one side, was odd, I asked the midwife and she said it was prob BH which we can get from like 8 weeks or something, and the uterus often moves around to make way for the other organs. They're super obvious now, strangely I can't remember them all first time round...
Tildy, hope you have a great time at the in-laws. And can I add, having had a north hemisphere Christmas before there are MANY advantages to having it in summer!! Such as nice weather, summer holidays at the same time, lovely seasonal fruit, veges, seafood etc...
Laney, happy birthday, hope it was as nice as it could have been... I had my b'day a few months ago and it was hard as I expected to have my baby before my 28th birthday (and I thought I'd have had one before my 27th but it took so long to fall first time round) so it's a very bittersweet thing. But it's easier once it's over I think. Hope your boy starts giving you nice strong kicks.
Hi to everyone else, wishing speedy BFPs to all the tryers.
As for me, had a bit of a meltdown yesterday... DH went to put up the Christmas tree and I said I'd rather he didn't as I was trying to avoid obvious reminders of Christmas... he asked why and I said because Christmas was supposed to be a very specific way this year (I would have a 4 month old and he would play with my sister's 5 month old), and he got upset and told me I had to talk to him because he's not a mind reader, and I said I try to talk to him about it but he doesn't really respond, and he says he's trying to not be negative and upset me and it went on from there... he seems to equate talking about Edward with being negative about this pregnancy. I told him I don't and grieving for our first child is a separate issue to our second. I don't think he really got it but anyway, I suppose it was a good vent, I had a good cry and relived everything.
Baby has taken to kicking me quite hard in the bladder and cervix, can be quite uncomfortable. But I do love feeling he/she so much. I can't quite believe I'm coming to the end of the second trimester... As I said before though I'm having HEAPS of BH, has anyone else had them every hour?
Anyway, my parents are arriving today so we're madly cleaning. I wish you all love on a day that will be bittersweet at best, hoping we can all look forward to bubs in our arms next Christmas.
I can sympathise with you Rozzie, your DH sounds a bit like mine! I said something the other day about not seeing Cooper do all the things Corey is doing, and he just kinda says he doesn't like to think about those sorts of things it's too sad/negative. I feel myself getting defensive/protective for Cooper as to me I sometimes feel that he is trying to block him out rather than remember him, but I have to remind myself it's just his way. I think as mother's we just feel so different.
Thanks very much for your well wishes, I can't wait to get that op over and done with, so I can begin to heal and look forward to ( hopefully ) a new pregnancy. My OB did mention an almost certain c section next time as the uterus may rupture otherwise. I have to say I was a bit dissapointed as I would have loved a vaginal delivery, but at the end of the day if I get a healthy bub that's what really counts.
I'm sorry you've had a blue with your DH, I actually find my fiancee is the same as he finds talking about Joshua upsetting, whereas I love talking about him as it makes me feel closer to him. I didn't want to put up a xmas tree this year as well, but he's so big on xmas that I just went with the flow. I would have been 34 weeks pregnant at Christmas so it makes me feel really sad that it's going to be so different to what I expected....
Enjoy this Christmas knowing your little bub on the way is celebrating with you too.
hgirs, men are so different aren't they ???? That will never change, we just do/deal with situations differently....
Good luck ladies with your pregnancies, enjoy every bit of it !
Hope everyone has a great Christmas and a wonderful 2009 filled with beautiful surprises ! Lots of Babydust to all TTC.
Girls, I adore you all so much for your thoughts and positive vibes but lets get the bad news over and done with. Spotting last night turned into the ugly unwelcome fat witch this morning so I knew I would get a BFN today. Needless to say, I am devastated and all day. I went to the beautician this arvo to de-hair and the first thing this stupid little girl said to me was "I love Xmas. Do you have excited kids at home waiting for Santa?? I burst into tears right on the spot and said "I have a baby boy and if he was alive, Im sure he would have been excited". She was mortified. I was sobbing so much but managed to get out "I bet you will think twice about asking that question now wont you?" I feel like such a b*tch and it really is an ok question to ask most women BUT NOT US AND NOT TODAY!! She gave me a hug, a box of tissues then didnt say another word!
My FS is on holidays but he is coming in to see me tomorrow to discuss next steps. I may try another round of IUI but I think he wants to get the big guns out and try IVF so I have a lot of thinking to do tonight.
Theresa, I am so sorry you are feeling down. Wish I could reach through the screen and give you a . I personally cant wait until this bloody "festive" period is over. It only emphasises our pain and what we are missing out on. Agggrrrrr.
Beata, I am so glad you feel at home with us and yes, chat away while you are recovering. We are always here for you.
Rozzie, sorry about your meltdown. As stated above, I think this time of year is lethal to us and some men just dont get it unfortunately. My DH is wonderful, when I was pg he googled his little heart out, read all the books and gave me the low down of where bubs and I were at each day! However, he doesn't talk about Sebastian much and chooses to focus on the future so I guess that is his way of dealing with things. How exciting for you to be feeling all those big kicks! Enjoy spending time with your parents.
Lan & Tildy, hope you are enjoying your time away.
Hey, noone answered my "What is BH"?? question. I have a feeling I should know but please dont think me dumb!
So anyway, am back on the TTC journey and am excited to be sharing it with so many of you lovelies.
Hello to everyone else and hope you are all doing well.
Last edited by dd0207; December 23rd, 2008 at 06:48 PM.
Diana, I waited all day to hear your news, just wasn't the news we wanted, I'm sorry. I am with you I can't wait till Xmas is over, we had a shocker last year, and now with all that's happened this year... But 2009 will be the year for all of us I am hoping like mad! BH - sorry I meant to answer that and forgot, Braxton Hicks! Big hugs for today, it really is hard.
Thanks Helen. I couldn't wait until DH came home so I could get online and get some hugs from you all. Noone else knows we are TTC so felt really alone today. I am soooo grateful I have you all.
We have all certainly had a hard and emotional couple of years haven't we. Here's to 2009!
Hellooo! Came back from the coast early as spending 24hrs a day everyday with my nieces and nephews was more than my little heart could bear so DH and my mum and I escaped early.
Had to get on right away to see how you guys are doing and had such a fright when I read the beginning of Diana's message about bad news. AF is a total cow but relative to the kind of bad news we've all had, she is minor and I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Not that I don't acknowledge how disappointed you are, Diana.
We are all having such a hard time. I don't know what to say that hasn't been said. I wish I could physically hug you all. Special welcoming hugs to Beata and Zachary's Mom.
Where is Jo? I'm worried. I messaged her on Facebook last week and haven't heard back. Katie, do you have any other ways of contacting her?
Paula, you always make me laugh. I hope I make you pee with excitement soon then :-)))) I'm now on CD19. No crazy phantom pregnancy signs this time. Too busy feeling sorry for myself, I think.
Thanks Lan, sorry for the fright. You are right, after what we have all been through, she is sooooo minor and I will not give her another thought. I also demand she stays away from us for the next 10 months! It is all up to you to get us a BFP before end of year!
Sorry you had to escape early. Oh it is all so hard
I have a house full of family for Xmas Eve dinner tomorrow night and I just want to call and cancel. Boo to all things Xmas related...
Oh girls you are just so funny ! ( I feel right at home )
Diana ( aka dd0207 aha ! I now know your name now ) I'm sorry hun for the set back. But you know, it's only a wee one and a small hurdle. You'll get there hun, I know 2009 will be a good year for us.
I know what you mean about xmas, I'm putting on a brave face for DF but I also find myself thinking heaps of Joshua, and it makes me sad .
PS Good on you for telling that beautician girl exactly how you felt instead of pretending everything is OK. That was nice of her to give you a hug and a box of tissues....Sending you a huge hug hun
Hammi, thanks for your welcome hun, I'm really liking this group of all you lovely girls, there is so much support here.
Beata70 - Thanks - it is so hard. I never imagined this is how our Christmas would turn out and my heart is breaking. I can't stop crying and everything is upsetting me and I am getting so angry at all these people who are celebrating when I feel like dying! I never thought life could be so unfair. I will keep praying that we all get our BFP's in 2009. Oh - and the name thing is fine - it happens all the time lol
Katiegirl - thanks for the welcome. I have felt so much better in myself with all these wonderful ladies to talk to. I known it is an awful place to be but at least I know everyone here understands what I am going through- Instead of people who "imagine" what it's like!
Berry1 - thank you so much for your kind words. I appreciate it more than you know.
Rozzie27 - I kow what yo mean about the Christmas thing. I have not put up any decorations or even aknowledged it is Christmas. I a making a sacrifice by going to DP's parents (with my parents) for Christmas dinner (and I am dreading it as there will be 14 people there and I am not in a festive mood at all). We got Zachary;s autopsy results and there was no conclusive reason for his death. All his organs were normal and they could not find a reason. I am glad he was fine but it makes it harder to accept. I keep thinking - if he was so healthy, why did he die?
dd0207 - I just want all this hooha to be over with too! I can't wait for everyone to get back to reality! I miss my Zachary so much. He would have been 5 months old tomorrow so I am not quite sure how I am going to be tomorrow. I just hope I can get through the day at work without having a meltdown. I am so sorry for your horrid experience - people just don't think (unfortunately). My thoughts and prayers are with you xxx
Hammi - welcome back and thanks for the welcome. I feel very at home here and I love the fact that I can just be myself.
Take care everyone and if I don't get a chance tomorrow - I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas and a new year that sees your dreams coming true xxx
Diana, sorry to hear AF arrived, such bad timing she has at the moment!!! I know it's probably no consolation, but it's a good sign that you're body is back in a rhythm, next month you'll be rearing to go. I think good on you for crying in front of that girl. I really think that we feel so alone because losing babies is such a social taboo and people just don't think it happens, I think it's important to be honest about it so that there is more awareness.
Theresa, that is really rough not having a cause for Zachary's loss. Again I hate to do the 'at least' bit because I know it doesn't help, but my OB told me that there is often no cause found, that there is a lot that medicine doesn't know about babies in the womb, and also that a second unexplained loss is extremely rare.
Lan, you did so well to spend some time at all with your nephews and nieces. I've stayed away deliberately, I knew I couldn't deal with it. I hope the rest of your holiday is a bit more restful and you and DH have some quality lazing time together.
Jo, hope you're OK and just too busy with your family to chat, wishing you a nice Christmas with your two earth angels and two heavenly angels.
I cannt sleep in past 6 am these days (unless I have to work, then I have to drag myself out of bed, where is the logic???). Very odd.
Hi ladies
Sorry to crash in (some of you know me from the pg area), but I just wanted to let Diana know how sorry I am to hear that horrible wench AF arrived! I have been spying on you and was hoping for good news!
Have a great xmas everyone and I hope all you lovely ladies TTC have lots of luck in 2009.
Jo x
Jo - Hi how are you going in Hospital? I do a bit of spying on you too! I really hope the bed rest is helping, not a nice place to be for Xmas, but none the less the best place to be. I feel like I have a vested interest in you! Has the cervix length got any better? Here's cheers to it getting longer or even stable and you being able to go home in a few weeks.
Merry Christmas (although most of us seem to be having a meltdown at the moment, including me!).
Helen
. Sounds like you have had a difficult time. I am sure you are nervous about the op, but its great that it is coming up soon so you can get on with TTC again. I am sure you are in good hands.
all day. I went to the beautician this arvo to de-hair and the first thing this stupid little girl said to me was "I love Xmas. Do you have excited kids at home waiting for Santa?? 
I burst into tears right on the spot and said "I have a baby boy and if he was alive, Im sure he would have been excited". She was mortified. I was sobbing so much but managed to get out "I bet you will think twice about asking that question now wont you?" I feel like such a b*tch and it really is an ok question to ask most women BUT NOT US AND NOT TODAY!! She gave me a hug, a box of tissues then didnt say another word!
Bookmarks