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Thread: TTC after Stillbirth/ Recurrent Miscarriage or Loss after the First Trimester

  1. #109

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    Oh Bailey, Im so sorry - I didnt mean to make you cry. I wonder if it is a full moon today if we all seem to be having a tough one... I was so surprised and touched when she gave it to me I dont even remember what I said, I know I said thank you but couldnt say much else cause I didnt want to cry in front of everyone (noone other than her knows) but DH said that she would have been able to tell how much it meant by my face... I hope so.



    Oh well best be off and get these puffy eyes rested Sweet dreams

  2. #110

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    Hi girls,

    Just a quickie from me. I have read all your posts but don't have time to do personals at the moment. Just going off for my 19 week scan so I'll pop in later and give you all the wonderful news.

    Also, the sweetest thing happened last night. My friend who has come from Brisbane for my scan gave me a 'mothers day present' last night. It was a ring that she had made for me with an Opal (Harry's birthstone) in it. After a lot of tears it made me realise how lucky I was to have such treasured friends and how I should just forget about the troubles with the MIL and AIL.

    Oh well, I am off to Canberra this afternoon so I have to go and drop the dogs to the kennel and then get organised for the scan.

    Big love to each and every one of you.

    Lv Spring

  3. #111
    Heybacko Guest

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    Just sending to Flower and Spring -hope to all goes well for you both today!

  4. #112

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    Thinking of you today Tommysmum - sending you as many :stickvibesboy:
    that I can muster...

    Spring woo hoo my love what a milestone today is! I hope you can post and tell us just how beautiful Lil Spring is! Drive safely to Canberra and take good care of you and Lil Spring. RElax, Enjoy!

    Mel:
    That poem was so very lovely - what a kind thing for that woman to do. The world is full of amazing people - we just need to try and focus on them and away from the folk that don't make us feel so great... It's great that you have symptoms - I had a this morning at 10dpo so I think I am out of the race. I may not be but I am not feeling very positive. Anyways off to the obs by 9am (it's a 45min drive) so I need to get out of here (I am eating muesli while I type!).

    Alex:
    Thanks for thinking of me...

    I will pop back in later. Have a great day everyone.

  5. #113

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    Hi everyone, So sorry I have been away!! So much has happened since I was last in.... Just want to send Best of luck vibes to tommysmum and Deb, and Spring today! Spring hope your scan is fantastic, Deb, hope you have a great OB visit, and fantastic prog levels, I got a BFN the day b4 AF was due, I DEF thought I was out, but no, a really stong as positive few days later, so you just may be way to early. sending as many positive vibes I can muster.
    Tommysmum, I so pray it is nothing, and you will see a healthy little bean ...

    Mel, what a truly lovely thing for this person to do! Such a lovely gesture.Our pain is so invisible, and thats the hard thing, and we try to just get on sometimes..

    I was talking to a pregnant mother this morning, due in 2 weeks, and its like I have never had anything happen to me, I have been pregnant so many times and M/C while she was trying, and it was like I had never lost one, I didnt feel important at all. I so want this one to stick, I dont want to loose another one, I dont want to be the "poor michelle, M/C again".. ya know. Thats the main reason I dont tell anyone... but very hard going through a loss on your own...thankkgoodness for BB
    I had an hcg done, and it was nice and high, but after the last M/C ihad all that too, so im afraid there is not too much to give me the great big ol confidence boost just yet. DH is going away to gold coast on thursday, so I wont get a scan until he gets back if things stay put till then anyway! I wont have time to do anything, and I would rather not know IYKWIM. Im constantly checking and so scared I will see blood, everytime I get a niggle or pain. Im just a real pain!!! So sorry for the downer post, I know Im supposed to be happy and excited, but Im just way to scared still... I was hoping it would go away by now maybe, but o well, have so may milestones to get through yet...Off to the Docs today, to see if HCG has doubled since last one, Im praying that at least that has...AAARGH
    Big Hi to all the newbies, have to go way back to catch up on you all, hope your stay will be short and very sweet
    SOME GREAT P are coming this way in this thread, I can feel it.....

  6. #114

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    Hi all,
    How is everyone, i've been away for a week then had the kids home on holidays so i haven't had the chance to get back here!

    Thanks everyone so much for the support on Storms 3 month b'day, you ladies are just so wonderful!!!!!

  7. #115

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    hellooo, we have been a chatty bunch haven't we. how fantastic is that we have a forum where we are able to do this. thank goodness for bb. i haven't had a chance to catch up just yet so this is a quickie.
    spring, deb and tommysmum hope all goes well for you today, thinking of you guys.
    mel if you want to have a chat about maybe meeting up for SIDS or anything else email me at [email protected]
    thanks for the advice on ttc, had a chat with DP last night about it, got a few things sorted. we figure Phoebe wasn't planned so we are just going to leave it to nature.

    went to lunch with a few friends on the weekend, first time we'd sat down together since Phoebe's passing. I actually found myself comforting another friend, she had a baby a month before Phoebe, it seems she is going through a bit of post natal depression. I guess she kind of feels a bit guilty, it was really quite strange. I'm still trying to work it out in my head.

  8. #116

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    Hey girls, super duper short one from me today. I was meant to leave for Canberra an hour ago.

    Lil Spring is fantastic all totally normal which I loved to hear.

    Got to scoot to... won't be back online until Thursday night.

    Big love to each and every one of you

    Luv Spring

  9. #117
    Heybacko Guest

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    Oh that's fantastic news Spring!!
    Big to you and Lil Spring

  10. #118

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    Hello guys

    Thanks for all your wishes EVERYBODY !!! All is ok - phew. After 3 hours waiting for various tests and chats with doctors i finally had my scan and there was a little blur on the screen with this little ticker pumping away - i just balled my eyes out. All the doctors knew what i was going thru (as you have to tell them your history) and i was expecting the worst scenario (i even didn't eat or drink today thinking i would need a D&C) but it has given me some confidence to see that little heart beating. The doc said all looked perfect (ovaries, sac, heartbeat, bloods - everything !) They could even see the "cyst" that the embryo burst out from as they put it (mind you i panicked when they said cyst). So far then that is positive news. Thanks for all your support and well wishes - truly appreciated....but a long way to go just yet. Also they said i am not as far as i thought (7w instead of 7+4)- but that it is still early to tell what dates they are set at yet.....

    Flowerchild - sorry to hear about your BFN this morning but it is still not too late and you of all people know that. I pray for you (i don't really pray in the religious sense but you know what i mean)

    Spring - congrats on lil spring - that is excellent news !!!

    Bailey - hope you are having a better day (those **** ones have really been hitting lately haven't they). Did you go to playgroup or did the monsoon keep you at home ?

    Mel - what a kind gesture of that lady (stranger). It is heartbreaking that someone so distant can do that for you and yet those close do nothing. I know i have tried to get in contact with a couple that have lost a baby recently in my area - would love to help out and send a card but i don't know their exact address and i am scared to impose (i would be the total stranger). But it just shows that i don't think it hurts to do something like that.

    Klee - it is strange about your friend - perhaps it is guilt and her emotions/feelings i guess are only natural - we can't change the way we feel. You are also brave being there for her (and i guess hearing all her baby stories - very hard).

    Jo - hope you are coping with the kids at home - do they go back this week ??? Should give you some peace soon.

    Chelle - what you are feeling is normal - don't want to get your hopes up and looking for signs of blood all the time. I know exactly (i think most of us do) what that is like. With all that babydust you have sent how can it not stick !!!

    Anyway must go and attend to a grumpy husband - ergh !
    Last edited by tommysmum; April 24th, 2007 at 08:12 PM.

  11. #119
    Heybacko Guest

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    More excellent news, I am SO pleased for you Tommysmum
    When I am pg again ( ), I will feel exactly as you did
    So glad your day went so well

  12. #120

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    spring and tommysmum - some wonderful news finally, so happy for you both.

  13. #121

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    I just got home and wanted to check on Tommysmum... Sending out some positive vibes and lots of love. I will pop in and out to check on you... :hugs:

    Hi again Chelle, Jo and Klee. I will come back later and do some personals.

    My progesterone was 97 WOO HOOO!!!!!!! That's a fabulous result and shows that things are going well. As my obs says my progesterone is super, my endometrium is "beautiful" and I have responed text book to the 150mgs of clomid. It's just a matter of time. She is telling me I am jumping the gun by thinking I am out of the race this month. But I just feel I am not. I will pop back soon.

  14. #122
    Heybacko Guest

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    Hey Flower, at least three of the 'ObGyn's at BB said you weren't out of the race too!!!
    We prescribe you take some of those positive vibes we are all sending back at you!!
    That's a hat-trick of good news today, things are looking up and about time too!

    Think I'll go and have some chocolate now...

  15. #123
    *Kristee* Guest

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    Hi girls,

    Sorry it has been so long since i last posted, there has just been so much happening lately and to tell you the truth i didn't want to come in here as i don't think i would have coped to well emotionall especially after a few sleepless and pillows full of tears nights.

    Deb thanks for the info re FS when i go and see Jane i will inquire about Trixie and Scott.
    Tommysmum glad to hear that your DH let out his emotions and got it all out for now that is great news!!
    I have tried explaining how losing my babies has felt and i think he understands to some degree but most of the time it feels like i am talking to a brick wall
    Bailey sorry to hear that DS was sick. It is hard when they are sick and you haven't had any sleep to look after them. Although i am glad it was nothing serious.
    Sorry to hear that AF turned up for you. TTC with wacky cycles is hard but i managed to do it with DD so it is possible!!
    Spring we must all have the best name!!! I have never come across someone with the same name as me that has been through what we have and now there are 3 of us, i am in total shock.
    Ever since you started talking about the AIL i knew there was something fishy going on!
    You handled it very well, you are such a strong woman who knows when she is right (must be the name hehehe). There is no way i think you were over reacting!!! You were quite within your rights to act the way you did.
    Mel you were not out of line at all with what you said. It was so true!! I just hate how we express emotions different it really frustrates me. My DH sounds a lot like yours, i must admit that ttc keeps me sane and i manage to cope better whilst ttc. That is why now i have decided to go on ttc.
    Sorry to hear about your fight with DH but at least now you have got it sorted. It is great that you both got your feelings out to each other and i totally understand loving him more for letting out how he is feeling to you.
    Reading your paragraph about mothers day really hit home and made me cry. I still have those emotions as well but i do have one DD i can celebrate it with. Over the years i have decided that Mothers Day is the one day in the year i just wish didn't exist. Sounds like Fathers Day is going to be a tough day as well, reading that i just want to give you both the biggest hugs.
    That movie sounds like it is right up my ally must go and see it!!

    Congrats on good news Spring, Deb and Tommysmum.

    Oh DD has just woke will be back later.
    Basically i have just beem feeling BLAH, and can't stop thinking WHY??

  16. #124

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    Tommysmum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO Y*IPPPPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! That is wonderful. I really felt for you re: not eating my love. I have done the same in the past... Rest up, eat well and know that we are all barracking for that little bean in there!

    Spring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOO HOOOOOO you keep growing so beautifully for us LIl Spring!

    I am truly sorry for not answering all of your posts. Today has been hectic. Tonight I am off to yoga so I need to get dinner on the table NOW!
    Thanks for all of your wishes today. I am not feeling negative. I just don't think its' my month. I am okay about it. I have a plan and once I have a plan I am okay (it's my anal nursey nature! )

    I just received in the main my 10 x 10miu preg tests from Lullaby so that should keep my peeonastick obsession well fed!

    Nighty night from me and I will *see* you tomorrow...

  17. #125

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    Thanks guys for your well wishes. Scary stuff today !

    So Flowerchild - 10x10 preg tests...are you saying there are 100 in there ??? If so, are you planning on having 100 more babies - geez you are keen... I don't know anything about "levels" etc but by what you have written it sounds like you still have a chance.... so if there is a chance, no matter how small, there is no reason it can't be your month....

    Kristee - sorry you have had a rough time lately. I was wondering where you had got to but had totally understood at the same time. It is a sh*t isn't it ! Just not fair and life can be so cruel - and again "why us". There has to be a positive turn for all of us and there will be - sometimes it just takes time (and what a sh*t way to play patience)...

    Heybacko - you will be pg again and maybe again after that - geez that is something to think about. I hope you are doing ok - well better than ok.

    Hello to everyone else - hope you have a nice evening. I am going to hop into my toasty bed and watch tv - i have socks on (my feet are absolutely frozen) - i am turning into an old maid. Before i go why not spread some

  18. #126

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    Hello Ladies,

    Wow, there are so many new people here, I still haven't had a chance to go through all of the posts I missed when I was away, so I don't know you all yet, but I am sorry that you are all here, but glad you found us.

    Tommysmum - I am so so so happy that everything is ok with bubs. I was just up thinking about it all last night. I felt that it would be all ok, but I also know that I would be feeling exactly the same. I am gonna give that baby a good talking to when they come out!! I didn't go to playgroup today, crappy weather and DS is still a little unwell and cranky, so I thought I would ditch it today. But I will go next week, I am very keen to catch up, plus I have DD's fairy dress to give to you.

    Spring - Glad to see that Lil Spring is being good, maybe because they know that they will be seeing daddy tonight so they have to be on best behaviour Drive safe and have a fantastic time away.

    Lynn - How are you doing? Hope you are having a nice time away. What did you think of the Sids and Kids meeting?

    Mel - Hope you aren't still crying about the gift from your workmate. I am sure that she knows how much you appreciated it. Hope you are DTD lots and lots

    Flowerchild - Yay on all the good stuff going on in your body I don't know what it all means, but it all sounds exciting. Don't give up on your self just yet, it's not over till the old witch sings (or a hundred bloody HPT's tell you otherwise) Fingers and toes are crossed for you.

    Kristee - Yes, not sure what is going on with these cycles of mine, they are mad. But it is good to hear that you managed to catch an egg with yours. I have just ordered a trucjload of OPK's to try and pinpoint my fertile days, so I don't waste too much time DTD for no reason...lol, that is terrible, poor DH, but he knows I am using him

    hi there too to Klee. Heybacko, jlk, chelle and of course Dream (where are you??)

    Well, I have had a better day today, I had a bit of a meltdown over the last two days, but of a 'why me' 'how can this happen to us' blah blah - I am sure you all know the drill. I tried to snap out of it, but then I figured, if anyone deserves a little self-pity it's us, right girls? I think a big combo of getting home from holidays (now with nothing to look forward to) a crappy all over the place cycle (as well as the false positives i got just before going away) and the realisation that I will not have a baby before chrissy now just all hit me harder than I expected. Oh well, it's all been purged now, so hopefully I will feel better now. Hope you are all well.

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