How do I get through this??

[nicjay]

Thank you so much everyone for all the messages of support - I have had tears in my eyes as I read them all

I am still very emotionally shattered - today has been a difficult day, my first venture out into the world where people ask you that innocent question "How are you?" I'm sure they don't want to know that I am feeling like absolute and utter cr@p But I do know that I will have to take it day by day, and that it will take some time.

I have had a few glimmers of hope though - DH and I have started to talk about conceiving another, and we are both determined not to give up. I have so many questions for my ob, and I'm impatiently waiting for my 4 week visit to go over my options for future pregnancies. Kellieem, you are not being offensive in the least asking if I have had any investigations. I have had cardiolipin antibodies, lupus and ANA testing done - all normal. But I fully intend to ask for more blood investigations as well as an internal ultrasound to check things out.

I have also had a lovely offer to chat from one of my obs secretaries - she has had 3 miscarriages I believe - and I have her number here and plan to give her a call and have a talk sometime next week, when I am hopefully feeling a bit less emotional.

On a personal note, I also want to say a big thanks to Salt and satya, my former TTC buddies. Thank you both so much for your messages. Salt - I hope you are doing OK these days, I don't see you post much here anymore, I imagine the whole TTC thing is very difficult now for you (I so know how that feels) and I hope you get some answers from your FS appointment. Satya - I hope you are doing OK now too - I was so upset to read of your relationship problems.

And to everyone else who has taken the time to reply, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. It really has made a difference to me knowing how much support is available here on BB. Hope to talk to more of you soon.