Seperation Anxiety - Both of us!

[~Kim~]

ENigma, only you can do what's right for you guys.
There are a couple of options if you decide to take her Tuesday.
Drop her off and go and sit in the car for a short time (10mins or so - or until you can't bear it) then creep back inside and see if you can see through the door/window to see if she's OK. Don't let her see you though, cos if she is settled, you don't want to disrupt her again. If she's still unsettled either repeat the process or take her home.
I remeber when I was learning to walk in high heels and some one told me 'pretend you're confident, and no-one will know the difference". This is similar. Children can pick up on your stress. I don't mean be blase about it, but be cheerful and upbeat. Tell her all the wonderful things she's going to do today. Most improtantly kiss her and tell her you will come back for her shortly.
Tell her that every day you drop her off and soon she will trust you to do as you say.
It isn't selfish the way you are feeling. I truly wish I had had that choice. Children definiatley don't need daycare but if the opportunity is available there are certainly many many benefits for the child too.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

[Starfish]

Hi Enigma

I am wondering if perhaps it might be a language barrier problem. You said she went okay on her first day, but didn't want to go back the next?
You say you speak Polish at home, but does Anetka (lovely name BTW) understand English? Maybe she got scared because all the words she heard were unfamiliar and she couldn't understand what people were saying?

[enigma]

Starfish - yeah , Anetka knows no english - but she understands a lot of polish , so before we go in I tell her over and over again that theres lots of kids to play with and toys - and that im only going to the shops and ill be back soon - im sure the fact that she doesnt understand a word the carers are saying doesnt help the situation
Thats another thing , the earlier she picks up english the better , i was 5yrs old when we came to Oz and i remember how much i was teased because i couldnt speak "properly"

Kim - I think on Tuesday i might go in with her , and watch her reaction. If she is as desperate to get out as she was on Thursday , ill leave with her , but if she is just cranky .. i might try going for a short while

I think the issue is the daycare centre itself too. They keep forgetting that im sitting there , and that im a mother too - they arent exactly overjoyed to be spending time with all the kids , in fact i dont think they couldnt care less.
A little 9mth old was crying so so much when i was there.. and they just kept saying his new , he'll get used to it. It wasnt even my child but i was feeling his pain , they left him in a highchair crying on his own

The first day Anetka had a bit of a cry herself ( so they tell me ).. when we came to pick her up , she was standing above one of the carers with tears on her face , and they werent paying much attention. ..until they saw me come in ofcourse

So i think im also concerned about the way they will deal with her crying. I wouldnt want her to think no one cares

ahhh i dunno.