Possible TMI ahead.

DP and I are struggling to find the time/ space for special cuddles. We both want to at times but its usually interrupted by DD (16 1/2 months old) waking and I can't DTD when she's awake- it's just too hard to wear those 2 hats at the same time.
At other times he's interested and I'm not and sometimes it's vise versa.
I often feel drained- partly side effects from antidepressant medication and from exhaustion from work and just being a very present gentle parent. I'm also struggling with often not wanting a lot of touch. Pre birth I was very touchy feely and I'm struggling to make sense of the radical change and the guilt and sometimes shame I feel at the change.
On the weekend DP and I both have a morning each to sleep in while the other looks after DD.
DP wants more time alone with me and I do too and he's comfortable with paying a babysitter to look after DD but I'm not. I don't want to do that to DD- leave her with a stranger so family is our only option as my BFF is heavily pg and unwell.

So how do you organise yourselves to DTD?
Do you or have you felt the same or similar as me? ( to be honest I feel like a bit of a freak)
Can you DTD with a child awake?
Do you like touch less after birth?
I'd love some ideas and reassurance please.
TIA