Hmmm, I still think we're going round in circles about our definition of 'friends' in this context, though Ryn and I have settled on what we mean about it. Plus, I do believe, in a certain metaphysical way, that DS chose us as parents, although I realise you mean 'choosing friends' in a different way. I mean 'friends' in a way that is specific to DS's and my relationship, and others think I mean 'friends' in the way they have friends. It's possible to have all sorts of friends, even ones you actively guide and teach