Hey everyone,

As Angel just said, private messaging is a facility available only to platinum members. Pukeko - I put in a post for you in the 'introduction' forum a few days ago when you first joined, and I mentioned platinum membership, so you might want to suss that out for all the info! There is also the chat facility on the main site (you need separate membership there) which is open to all members (you don't need platinum membership for that). I'm so sorry you're having such a bad day. Sadly there are many ups and downs following what you've been through, but I'm glad you're finding this site useful and supportive. Like the other girls have said, you should also be very proud of yourself for how you handled the situation with your friend. I'm glad that you allowed yourself to express your feelings and not suppress them. I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it all better for you matey - it's such a hard road to travel and there seem to be reminders of what you have lost all over the place and it's always the ones that you least expect that hurt the most, like your reminders. I had written all my dates etc in my diary last year and I wish I hadn't because then I had to either leave them there, or go through and white them all out - either way it was going to be hard to see it IYKWIM?